Hola, a pasado tanto tiempo desde que nos vimos por ultima vez y me gustaría saber como estas? Estas bien?
Que has hecho?
Necesito hablar contigo, necesito un abrazo tuyo de esos en los que me asegura que nada malo va a pasar, te necesito a ti.
Te quiero J.

sweetie
To this day I still love you as if it were the first day. I miss you but I don't dare to tell you.

You push me away. I just wanna help. You say things that break me, but still don`t want my help. I just whish there was something I could do. I can`t move on until you are happy, and it`s runing me.

if you were to text me right now i would still get butterflies even though you put me through so much pain

I miss you but i know that you dont miss me. I wish things were different with us. You will always have a special place in my heart

i miss everything we did. you are so special to me and there is not a day i haven’t thought about you. i really hope that wasn’t the end of it all.

I know you will always love her, and I will never be her. but I have to be okay with that because being second best is better than being without you.

wow... como explicarte que sigo amándote?
digo... eres mi "mejor amigo" pero la preferiste a ella. Y te extraño mucho...

I’ve moved on. At least that’s what i like to tell myself. Everything reminds me of you. The time we had... and what we could’ve been. You were the best one out of all of them, my first love. Oh I knew you were too good to be true, but I got carried away. Being with you was like walking on cloud nine. I thought about how we would have a love that’s patient, slow but sure, a love that’s worth it. But, I don’t belong in that genre. You know in movies where... the main male protagonist have this undying love for a certain girl, where he would do anything to be with her and she doesn’t even have to do anything. Well, that’s not me, and i’m used to that. But you made me feel like that girl. I knew it wasn’t real. I knew it the moment I saw you look at her as if she’s the only girl in the world, the way you talk about her as if she’s all you think about.. and all I could do was let it happen, what could I do anyways? Tell you about what I felt? and If I did, would you have listened? You wouldn’t. Because I wasn’t important to you— not as much as her. I was a background character in your life. A childhood friend. Nothing more than that. All I did was listen, listen, and listen to you talk about her and during those times I was imagining a future with you. She is so beautiful, and so strong that it feels wrong to hate her. I was stupid, wasn’t I? Yeah, haha.

I love you ever since i met you when you use to make jokes about me and stuff we were so young and didn't really know what love was we were only 12 and i know you don't remember and most likely don't care but you in my opinion were something special i don't know why but you were just always something special to me you were nice to me and only me which made me feel good about myself but then we became toxic you lied and you cheated on me and i always went back because i always thought you were different each and every time. I somehow fell in love with you within the months you were cheating on me and breaking up with me over stuff i had no control over now it's been a year since me and you were dating and i miss you everyday i might've told you i didn't have feelings for you but i lied especially now that i have been thinking of you and having dreams of you i know it's crazy to say this but i want you back in my life because yes we were toxic but you made me feel good at times i miss you,i miss us falling asleep on the phone, you making sure i was okay,you checking up on me yes you made feel insecure at times but you also built up my confidence you might've hurt me a lot but you also made me feel good still love you and need you in my life

you shattered my heart but i’d still do anything for you. i guess i won the i love you more game after all.

its been months and i cant remember what it feels like to not miss you,i hate the fact that i cant hate you for that

I really, really, wanted it to be you. It still can be if you change your mind. I hope you change your mind.

I love you. i am completely madly in love with u i mean i’m know ur favorite song and what you want to be when we grow up. i’m jealous when ur with other girls type in love with you

When you said that you loved me I meant it when I said it back. You said it was just a drunk text and you didn’t mean it.

I really miss you, and every night it takes every ounce of me not to text you. Half the time I cant sleep

I still miss you and i think i always will. I'll never Fall out of love with you. I'm still waiting for you to come back.

Wish we could go back to watching our favourite programs and eating our favourite foods at 1am. Miss you

Wish we could go back to watching our favourite programs and eating our favourite foods at 1am. Miss you

yeah maybe soon ill let go of our memories, ig i just made too many mistakes for our friendship to come back

You dont understand how much I miss you. I want you back so badly but I cant do that to myself. You moved on so fast. You acted as if we were nothing. It hurts so much to know that you can tell me that you “love me” but not mean shit. I wish you the worst.

I know it’s past time to move on, but I still hoped you would have at least tried something to prove you cared about me. Miss you I guess, really want to talk to you

You know, my friends warned me about you. They saw all the flaws that i was too blinded by your charm to see. It felt like a magnet was pulling me to you. You would pull me to you, now you pull away from me. I know you never loved me, but you were MY first love. It’s kind of funny, i would dress up everyday hoping you’d notice- you didn’t. I would give you little presents hoping you would notice- you didn’t. I made all the signs clear as 20/20 vision PRAYING you’d notice- you didn’t. Maybe i’m naive. The funny thing is that even after all the shit you put me through I’m still madly in love with you.

i know how much you hurt me. i can’t trust you. but every time i’m with you i forget everything because i’m in love with you and i shouldn’t be.

Odió pensarte en todo momento, odio que no salgas de mi mente, odió que no pueda olvidarte, odió mentir al decir que te supere, odió que apesar de todo el daño que me hiciste aún te amo.

i wait for you to message me and tell me that you don’t want to lose me but you never do and i’m losing hope

you keep hurting me. i dont know if you realize it but you are. you must know what youre doing when you text me for hours on end and sometimes even days, and when you asked me to hang out that one time.. ive never done something like that before, youre the only guy ive done this stuff with, but youre making it so hard. i felt like i could be myself around you and i really thought you felt the same way. i was so sure of it so many times, but then you go back to never texting me, unadding me on things.. why? i dont get it and i dont get you. you would open up to me about things and i really thought that meant something and more importantly i thought that maybe i could make things more bearable for you. but no, i cant, because you dont really care about me like i thought you did. i dont even think you really cared for me as a friend and i was just part of your little mind games. the most frustrating part is that i realize all this but the moment you reach out to me i would respond so quickly. i hate that im like that.

i don't think im in love with you anymore but I'm afraid i loved you so much when i did that it'll never go away

remember when you said forever? you're now the reason i'm scared to let people in.
it still hurts. a lot.

I know I've got to move on but I can't because that means I've got to remember what I'm moving on from.

Hey... it’s 7am rn. I didn’t get any sleep and stayed up all night thinking about you and you know what? I’m gonna treat this thing like my diary. To be honest, I don’t feel like I like you anymore. I think I don’t. I know we’re long gone but I still had feelings for you when we drifted apart. It took me months. All those months I cried at fuckin... 3am, couldn’t focus at school, work, and just kept wishing that you care enough to think about me too... but I know you don’t, and that’s fine. That’s the reason why we stopped meeting each other anyway, I just wish you had told me what you felt beforehand, I had so much hope for the both of us. Everything.. Just please tell me all those times we had together meant something to you. I know you didn’t love me but you atleast cared about me, right? ...Well, I guess this is moving on. It’s much lonelier than I had imagined. You know, losing someone so important to you feels like you lost a part of yourself. Everyday, when we still had each other, all I thought about was you. Everyday. We talk almost everyday before bed and right after waking up, I’d ask you about your day and you’d tell me all the interesting bits of your day. I’d listen, listen, listen, and just listen. But you won’t listen to me. Nor were you ever interested about how my day was. Now that you’re gone it’s just kind of like... back to square one, you know? I had to figure out how to do things that I used to do when you were by my side. I had to completely reset my routine, every morning i’d think “you’re gone, you’re gone, you’re gone, how will I spend this day without you? Without your hugs and kisses? without hearing your voice? Without you by my side? Who was I before I met you? Do I want to become the person I was before you?”. One thing for sure is, I don’t cry about you anymore. I don’t know why, it just stopped and I can’t exactly figure out why, but I still think of you, holding you and embracing you, but god fucking dammit you’re gone! And you wanted that! You left me in the dark when we promised we’ll always have each other. It’s so fucking stupid. All those times are so fucking stupid. I feel so fucking stupid for thinking that I meant something to you.

I really want to say that you are really my life and one day i hope I will met you even tho Is impossible.. I just wanna say i love you

Sometimes I regret that I never dated you, but I really think we're better off as friends. (you were J when I loved you, so that's why I didn't put your new name)

Hey, te quiero agradecer por todo lo que hiciste por mi, el dia de hoy te dejo libre, regresa con ella, se que eres mas feliz con ella que conmigo, se que la amas, por la forma en la que brillan tus ojos, lamento todo lo que te hice pasar, no olvides mi promesa siempre estaré aqui por si me necesitas, exito en todo, no me olvides nunca, adios

we dont really talk much anymore, we met during quarantine. i enjoyed the time we spent together. thank u for that. im sorry i suck at keeping contact, i really wish i could but its just so hard. i love u a lot. im not sure if its romantic. i dont think it is. but you mean a lot to me, so thank u for making quarantine not so bad. :)

i loved you more than anyone else but its ok you picked her she was skinnier and better than me ill never be good enough for you but ill always love you with my hole heart

i loved you with my hole heart . i fucked everything up when i could have done better . you promised me you wouldn't pick her and you did . i understand she is skinnier and way prettier than me . ill always love you more than anyone in my life you mean the world to me even though i might not mean it to you

Was that all I was to you? A mistake? Was that all our friendship was to you? And here I am reminiscing the days when we I was still beside you. The way my worries started to melt away when I was with you. This is stupid. I'm stupid.

I just want you to know that I’ll never care how far you push me away because when I told you that I would stay I meant it

I tried my hardest to love you, you hurt me, again... and again, it reached a point where I could never love you again, and that's okay.

you and her together hurts more than the initial blow of you leaving, knowing she’s the reason why is another kind of pain.

you always made me feel like i wasn’t good enough, the way it ended proved that, but also showed me that it was because i was more than enough.

I have liked you for a really long time. Like really long. Every other person I talked to was compared to you. I finally got to be with you and I realized your not all my mind had told me you were. You are just a person. I have this weight lifted off of me. I can love now without always thinking of you. Thank you.

Why did you have to lie? Did allowing me to develop feelings for you and you playing along help your conscience because of the pity you felt for me. To be honest, I know we were young but that doesn't mean it didn't hurt.

Maybe it was not what you wanted, but you took a part of me that I can never get back. Come to me, please

I'm sorry I wasn't strong enough to hold the two of us out of the water. I miss you, more than you know.

you’re the only person i’ve ever known with this exact eye colour. i miss them and i’m scared i’ll never see them again

Haberte roto el corazón es algo que aún me duele, casi tres años después. Lo siento muchísimo, pero no iba a ser feliz contigo y tuve que mirar por mí. Siento no haber sabido hacerlo mejor, no te merecías sufrir, fuiste muy buena persona conmigo.

why do you have to be such a player? you’re so beautiful, i see the stars in your eyes when you laugh. i wanna see them more.

I will love you until the day I die. You have a part of me forever. I will look for you in every boy I meet, wishing we could’ve made it work.