Unsent messages to ALEX

the warmth of the sun on my skin reminds me of your touch & the shadows cast on my walls at sunset remind me that love i have for you will be there everyday.

i never loved you or anything. but i still kind of miss having you around even a year after we’ve broken up.

i’m scared of how time goes so fast, i know it cause i count every single day since you walked out of my life and i still remember that night when i couldn’t be happier.

I hate you I hate that I still love you and the fact that I'm not over you is insane I hate the way you make me feel and the fact that you can still make me feel this way. The pain you but me through was unmatched and yet if I saw you smile I would fall for you all over again, but I know I can't because of everything you have done to break me down.

Summer's nights with you always was my favourite plan.
You, me and cigarette.
Now I'm lonely with my cigarette and a broken heart

you hurt me beyond repair, so i just became someone else. i’m stronger now, but i hope to never feel agony like you made me experience ever again.

I felt something with you that won’t ever leave me. I used to hate it but know how precious it is now.

Hey, I hope your doing alright. You probably moved on already but you reaching out to me is my only christmas wish. I miss you so much. Please, I'm counting on you for this one.

you changed the way I view love for the worst. I still don't know what I did to deserve being cheated on 3 times after repeatedly taking you back and forgiving you after you swore on my life you would never do it again. I loved you and I still do. I hope youre treating your new girl better than you treated me.

What happened bruh. What’d I do. Cuz clearly I did something to make you completely stop talking to me. And now you’re texting my bsf more than me. You keep texting her first, like today abt the test. You didn’t text me, but you immediately texted her and told her how u did. Why didn’t you do that with me like you used to. Please just tell me what I did. I want you. I want us to be close like we were before. I love you Alex. I love you a lot.

Our love was pure. We only touched once when i asked you to feel my cold hands and you lingered. But somehow i feel like i've never truly felt more of anyone than i did you. however i don't love you like that anymore obv and i wish it wasn't weird to reach out. I often wonder how different we might be now.

You've been there for me when no one else was and I'm forever grateful but I think it's time I let you go. You don't feel the same and I shouldn't feel this way. You deserve nothing but the best ans I know that's what you'll get. Bye.

I wish you would think about others more. I love you so much but your selfishness makes it hard to be friends with you.

Sometimes I think about what life would’ve been like if you hadn’t moved away. I like to think that you would’ve loved me back

I replay that scene from zion far too often but you’ve left a lasting mark on my life. I miss you. I wish you would come back to me.

I love you. I know its silly but you'er my sun moon and stars. maybe one day i can be lucky enough to call you my husband

you were the first person i really loved, and after all the things you've done and said I still cared about you, after like 4 months I'm still in love w u and I hope that this month things will get better

imissyou , there are so many things i want to tell you but i cant because i do not want to bother you . you make me feel some type of way when we text but then you randomly ghost me and i just wanna know why? i hope i hear from you soon . take care :)

you knew she didn't want you to touch her, but you did it anyways when you thought she was asleep. i hope you get your ass beat one day

I love you more than anyone on earth, but sometimes I want to self destruct and blow what we have to pieces. I wish I could tell you why.

sometimes the person that you wanted a part of the whole story was only meant to be a chapter, I keep reading the same one over and over again hoping for a different ending
imy

i'm sorry for pushing you away alley cat. i still love you and you're all i think about. we cant be together right now and i know that, but i hope one day youll know this is from me and remember me. i love you so much, please continue being strong for me. we'll meet in another universe. we're meant to be alex.

You're still the first person I want to tell everything to, but you don't even remember my birthday anymore.

i really wish what happened wouldn't of,but i'm sure it's for the best. i love you always. i hope you're well.

i don't think it was love but you represent a lot of firsts for me. in some way, a piece of me will always belong to you. i think i'll always feel something for you. i hope you're happy. i hope we cross paths some other time in our lives - i think you're meant for me.

I’ve been in love with you for years. Your tarot told me it was time to let go of something holding me back. This is me starting to let go

i've spent a year now trying to be perfect for you. but the more that i think about it, the more that i wish i would've moved on when i had the chance

Please stop blocking me and then unblocking me when it’s convenient for you...my heart can’t take all the heartbreaks you put me through.

I'm so afraid you won't trust me again. I'm so afraid I'll never get the chance to love you. I'm afraid you'll decide not to date me again and that you just want to stay friends. All I want is a future with you and to show you I'm trustworthy with your heart. I hate that I broke it in the past. I hate that I put you through that pain. I hate that I didn't give us another chance. I will wait on you. I will do whatever it takes. I have no intention of ever leaving you again. And I'll do what I have to do to prove that to you. We can go at your pace. We can start off as friends. I just want you in my life. I hope you'll want me in yours.

i know we've never been super close but thank you for always protecting me. you deserve better than what mom and dad gave you. i love you

You were the reason I know what love is. You broke me, and that wound will never be healed but at least I know what love means right?

you were my first love. i really did love you more than anything. you will forever mean everything to me

i honestly love you and i dont know why more then you can imagine I just cant let go I dont understand it

idk if that message was from you but i feel like it was. or maybe i just hope that you’re still thinking of me and i’m just seeing what i want. you used to say i did that a lot. i left because i was scared. last year you came back and you didn’t want me anymore. and i was afraid that it would happen again. and then you were gone for longer and i was so afraid and i couldn’t just talk to you about it like a normal person because you know how i am. and when i called you that day to tell you i couldn’t anymore. why didn’t you tell me i was wrong and ask me not to go. i wanted to be wrong so bad i couldn’t hang up the phone cuz i was waiting for you to tell me i was being ridiculous. why can’t you call me now and tell me i was wrong. i’m still waiting even though i told you i wouldn’t anymore. ps the new taylor swift album is rly good you should give it a listen

idk if that message was from you but i feel like it was. or maybe i just hope that you’re still thinking of me and i’m just seeing what i want. you used to say i did that a lot. i left because i was scared. last year you came back and you didn’t want me anymore. and i was afraid that it would happen again. and then you were gone for longer and i was so afraid and i couldn’t just talk to you about it like a normal person because you know how i am. and when i called you that day to tell you i couldn’t anymore. why didn’t you tell me i was wrong and ask me not to go. i wanted to be wrong so bad i couldn’t hang up the phone cuz i was waiting for you to tell me i was being ridiculous. why can’t you call me now and tell me i was wrong. i’m still waiting even though i told you i wouldn’t anymore. ps the new taylor swift album is rly good you should give it a listen

I’m sorry I was fucked up when we met, I wasn’t the right person. I love you, thank you for being my first love.

i pushed you away and i miss you, i hated the thought of you at first, and i’m sure you hate me now, but now all i want is for you to message me.

you never knew how i fell for you, we were close but the amount of pain you caused me allowed me to block you with no hesitation and now you're dating my first love. don't hurt him, that is all i ask.

its weird to think im the only one who was so invested you said I'm taking this too seriously really? you didn't care? why didn't you unfollow me straight away why not why are you so hard to love.

All i remember is u were my first kiss, and then u moved to Australia, and I still follow u. I haven’t really thought about u until they mentioned ur name and then I looked at ur insta. Hope ur well

Realmente me gustaba, por qué hizo eso? pudo simplemente decirme la verdad desde que empezó y evitarme que saliera lastimada de esa manera :)
Espero que después de estos años, esté siendo feliz.

romance isn't for us but your friendship is unreal. why was it difficult for you to call me beautiful?

Alex,
Ich kannte dich schon von früher, aber wir mochten uns nicht so gerne. Einige Jahre später jedoch haben wir zueinander gefunden. Wir haben angefangen jeden Tag zu schreiben und das fast jede freie Sekunde. Wir wollten uns unbedingt treffen, doch es gab die Ausgangssperre wegen corona. Ich habe mich bei dir geoutet und du dich dann bei mir auch. Dann hat es bei mir Klick gemacht. Ich liebe dich und das schon seit einer ganzen Weile. Als die Ausgangssperre endlich behoben wurde, konnten wir uns endlich treffen. Zu der Zeit war ich der glücklichste Mensch auf der Welt. Du hast mich zu einem besseren Menschen gemacht. Ich wurde selbstbewusster und du hast mich supported. Ich hatte das Gefühl du liebst mich auch... Aber im Gegenteil. Du hast dich so verändert, nachdem ich dir das gesagt habe. Ich hab alles zerstört. Es ist meine Schuld !

I wish you tried harder. I wish you wanted me as I wanted you. I wish you saw the potential in you that I saw.

You really messed me up, I cant get the thought of you out of my head. But im second choice and always will be even though I cant accept it

when you left, i understood the unique person who loves me completly and will do it ever is myself. Thank you love of my life.

I don't know why I still think abt you. I don't like that I do. I hated you. But I still wish we were on better terms.

I miss you. Like always. Tonight though I’m thinking about how I wish you had come visit me. I wish you’d have met my family. I wish I could’ve had my perfect weekend with you. If you come back it’s going to be hard to trust you. But what would really help is if you came to visit me. That would show me that you’re in it for the long term this time. I miss you poohbear.

i cared more about you then i did myself. i will always love you until the day that i die even if you don't feel the same.

You ruined me. I'm afraid of men because of you. I can't open up emotionally because you corrupted that too. Not to mnetion you ruined my only safe place, my home. Screw you