Unsent messages to B

Sometimes I think about how close we were and it breaks my heart all over again. We could’ve been so happy. I hope one day your ready to be loved by someone.

you were the right person at the wrong time. but there’s no such thing so i guess you were the wrong person.

i never really appreciated you till you were gone. maybe if i had been less stubborn things could have been different

I want to let you back in but I’m so scared. Why do I let you do this to me? You’re forever trapped in my mind.

The fact you make me miserable has me realising nothing ever really changed. Still take pride in making me look stupid and talking shit behind my back.

I'm proud of you for finally putting yourself first. I hope you understand I was only doing the same. It was hard to watch you fall out of love with me when you didn't even know you were.

It hurts me so much trying to love myself now that you completely destroyed me. I wish you knew you gaslighted me. I wish you could feel guilty. But if i tell you i will be become the same as you

We don’t even talk anymore but I still wear the ring you gave me and sleep with your shirt. Letting go is killing me;

i rlly wish i could hate u. u gave me so many fucking issues. i still miss u, and im better and healthier now, but i dont fucking know why i still miss u, and just sometimes i miss all of the issues too.

You are not a good friend. You treat people like shit and wonder why people don't want to be around you.

It’s been a year and a half now. By March it will be two years. I still care about you...do you still care too?

omg how was i so stupid to trust you. i don’t really get because you were never good for me and never will be but ofc i’d still want you. pls don’t come back i can’t i wish you hadn’t the last thing i needed was to go through something like this again.

i tried my best to not fall in love but the universe wanted us to:) but i guess it didnt want us to stay together.

being with you was the happiest time of my life, playing minecraft and just laughing having fun. i miss it. i miss your smile and your sense of humor. where did it go. i've got nobody to turn to anymore. you've changed. why did you have to leave me. go have fun with her.

You were the only one that made me happy. You were the only one who kept me going. now you're gone.. i just don't know what to do. everyday is the same. someday you might see this. I miss you bitch

You took up a significant amount of my heart, but if you told me right now that you wanted me... I don’t know if I would go back to you- And that’s on self growth!

yeah. i'm still thinking about you. i have a feeling you're over me, i don't know if i'll get to that point. you make my heart feel so full. it's been so long since we were together, i'm aware. but whenever you talk to me i remember the same feeling i had when you came up to me years before. i remember seeing from afar. i told my friend about you. look now, i'm still telling a friend about you. you make me smile. you don't say much, but i love when you do. even your silence is comforting. i hope to see you again. i keep thinking about how different it would be now. we've both changed so much. i want to hold your hand again. did you know that you're my best kiss? to this day, never had a better one. even if they were better, no one was ever you. everything seems to come back to you? i don't know why. maybe it's you're the first... my first love, my first kiss. god those eyes, i could look at them forever. i could look at you forever. it pains me how insecure you are; how can you not see how perfect you are? i feel like we could be good together, again. it wasn't our right time before. we were young, dumb, cringe, etc. now we are older. we're still growing, maturing, learning; but now we know that we don't know everything. we could be healthy and happy. imagine how easy that could be. me and you. i can't think of a good reply back to you. i want to kiss you. i wanna play with your dumb curly hair. i want to be your boyfriend again. i want us back, you said you missed it too. did that mean you wanted me too? even after all this time; could the spark still be there, my love? i wish i could stop thinking about you. please be thinking about me. thank you for shaping me, loving me, thank you for everything. i hope to be more than just a friend of yours again one day. you are magnificent. -you know who i am, trust your gut.

It’s Thanksgiving. I’ve been hoping to hear from you all day. I’d give anything for another chance to connect.

Well you were my first ever love, the person who i envyd to be with my rest of life, the one who actually was there for me when nobody was there, you were my giraffe and i was your'e mimilita. Til this day i love you very much but i still cant say it.. i know you wont see this but just know ill wait for you my turning page:,)

i'd cross oceans for you but it seemed like you won't even cross a puddle for me.
i love you but i'm sorry

I’ve accepted that I’ll never get the open and honest conversation I’ve always hoped we’d have one day. I’ve accepted the unanswered questions and words left unsaid. Maybe in another lifetime.

i know it hurts. it hurts me too. i dont know what i was missing but i guess it was past fixing. i dont think its possible to care too much i think thats called giving up. dont give up on the people that love you the most. time heals though, remember that. tomorrow wont hurt as much as today did. and for the record im back doing the one thing you made me promise you not to ever do again. i dont know if you ever actually understood what i was trying to tell you but things stop mattering when someone which such a big effect on your life leaves you, theres no need for trying to be saved if you dont care anymore.

i miss u so much. Why did you leave me at my worst? We were all for nothing. Despite that, I thank you for making me so happy. seriously thank you and i will always wish you the best.

i wish you knew how happy u make. U probably dont realize it but im so grateful to have you. U are the only reason why i wanna wake up in the mornin n go to school so thank u. I really want this to work. But i still have so much to work on mentally. and i really dont want to bring you down with me. u probably dont care as much as i do for u. and i get it. i wanted to make it work so bad not thinkin bout u im sorry

you liked me...what happened? did i do something wrong? im sorry if i treated u badly, they forced me i didn't mean to...i hope we'll be something oneday

Hi cutie.
You aren't in this world anymore.
But know that we miss you.
You deserved better. Really better. You were young and peaceful. Sorry.
Sorry for lost time.
Li

You said I deserve better, but if anything, I think you're the one who does. I'm sorry, and I miss you.

why did you talk to me that night? why didn't u talk to me when u were sober? that night ruin my life. thank you.

Hey, I know we don't know each other that long and we're friends, but I think I'm in love with you. I've never felt that way, but you love someone else which is ok, I don't blame you for this. I just thinks it's my fault, as always. I wanted to tell you that I love you and you matter to me. You're a great person and I wish you only best witch the other ones. It really hurts me but if you're happy I have to be happy too. Just know that you are important and even if it's shitty you have to keep going, no matter what will happen. Promise me you will keep going.
I'll always love you.
I

I love you. i loved you for two years now but never had the confidence to tell u. im too self insecure. ur too good for me and id never really be good enough.

I pretend I dont care about anything and that nothing affects me but i do and it does a lot. i wait for it all to hit me at once at which point i cant bring myself to do much even text u (which is my favorite thing to do :) ) I guess what im getting at is im sorry im so distant sometimes. im just so so scared of making u hate me. i realize by doing this im pushing u away and im so fucking sorry i so badly wish i wasnt. please dont let me make u go i need u so much u make everything feel better. we talk so much less now but i still lighten up when i see ur username pop up.

you know i like you more than i hate you. i wish you could tell me how you actually feel. idk if you like me but i hope you do. you told me you liked me and you loved me. you kept kissing me and you kept hugging me/pulling me in, every time i would move away you would tell me to stop and get closer to you. but you were drunk so i’m not sure if you like me or even love me.

I did love you and that’s what scared me. It also scared me that someone could love me again as much as you did. I’m sorry

I dreamt of you, and it felt so real, so at home... I miss you but I'll never contact you ever again. And that should be fine

Hi, I just know that we don't talk anymore and i'm so sorry for all the damage i did to you,i'm really happy that you are okay now and thank you for the moments we spend togheter, I hope some day you forgive me, i love u. ps: I still remender our song, but now its just a song and there is no pain in it.

Did you stop talking to me because of how I act? I would literally change everything about me for you.

Why are you ignoring me? You put the biggest smile on my face and now you're acting like you don't know me?

i love you. i still do. even i don't want to. i know you more than i know myself. for eight years. i did everything for you. you were my everything. my every word. my favorite song. i did everything for you but you didn't even say i 'like' you. but i told you that i love you every single day. i know it is hard for you. but i never taught that you hated me. i am sorry to your ego. but i think i should take a time for myself. because you wanted to. even you said forever, it is not infinitive. at least i hope. you are bad for me. you are the worst. you are the reason i hate myself. but i would never hate you. even i am not a single taught in your mind. fuck you. i cannot stop thinking of you. your hate is amountless. i didn't know it was for me, too.

i wish you knew how safe you make me feel. when i’m with you i feel like i’m in a bed of clouds and nothing can hurt me.

thank you for calling me everyday while i was in the hospital. i’m sorry i couldn’t show enough love.

you say you like me back but then stay with her. why? i've lingered in your head 3 years rent free. doesn't that mean something to you?

u say u like me too but then stay with her. why? don't u think me lingering in ur head for 3 years means something?

I want to tell you I love you, but I don’t want to scare you away. A piece of my heart will always be devoted to you.

I don’t think you were my first love but you made me feel some emotions that I never felt before. I know that you probably only used me and didn’t feel half the things I felt for you. But I still thank you for making me learn new things and the biggest lesson i learned from you is to never see the good in people.

you made growing up amazing. all those memories we got. and I wouldn't want to forget it in a million years.

sometimes i wonder if things could of been different. if we coulda stayed together. then i think nahh fuck u :)

I still believe that one day I'll have something with you again, I still know that there's something out there for us, we just aren't at the stage of finding it.

oh god i cant tell if i want us again or not or what i want why does life have to be so confusing. why couldnt u have told me before that you wanted me back. why does everything have to happen this way

I feel like you’re always on the lookout for the next best thing. I’m just waiting for my expiration date.

i want to hug you till the world ends .
i wanna hear you laugh . i wanna look in your beautiful eyes and get lost in them .