Unsent messages to E

do you feel the same way? i feel so jealous and i know i shouldnt but i feel like im not special anymore

hey, its been so long since we spoke, I mean not really but its been really long since I've opened up, even the tiniest bit. you know how much I hate opening up but for some unknown reason you make me wanna pour my whole fucking heart out, you make me wanna open up about everything, but at the same time you make me feel like i can never ever open up. I miss you, even if you were never really mine...

if you ever told me how much you were in love with me i would have said yes. we lost our chance. i miss you so so much

Do you remember the place you wanted to visit, but we we’re too young? because... we’re old enough now..
can i take you there or is that too wierd?

i’ve known you for years and we always end up talking again, but you completely broke me and used me so why do i still think of you?

i always thought u would find somebody closer, i guess it came true. I still sit at my phone hoping u message me.

You are the most incredibly person I’ve ever met
and all this time apart it’ve been something I don’t want ever to be in again
Don’t let me go never

I love talking to you but at the same time, you make me feel like I am little by your side, like you can't see me completely and you underestimate me.

After everything.. EVERYTHING u did me like that. I miss you.. wait no i don't really miss you i just miss our times together and how u used to be. She completely changed you and it hurts everyday there is not 1 day that i don't think about how we used to be. It hurts me to see you. I just keep getting flashbacks of everything. U ruined so much tbh i hate you i hate you for ruining so many things.

listen I love you so much! but if u don't love me anymore just let me know it isn't that hard dude :/

please don’t leave me, i seriously don’t know what i would do without you. i don’t see a future without you.

Hey i just wanted to tell you how much i like you like i never liked someone the waay i liked you i feel like you would never want me me i'm not one of the pretty girls you follow i'm not close to pretty i'm not even skinny i have marks on my body i have fat here and there i wish i could change that but i cant i tried and nothing worked i fell like shit yeas i might move over there and i all ready told you how i feel you said you wished you could have waled with me do you? you said one day we would be together and be happy but you i overthink way to much to a point were i think my hole life over and over again i wish i can change that i wish i could be there to give you what i want to give you i wish i can give you all of me i wish i could be there when your not feeling like your self i want to be there for you when no one is there for you but i cant we live one hour away i wish i could be there every sec of the day i wish i can hug you cuddle you but i know where never going to happen i just wish you can give me a change but you might not even give me a ch nge at the end of the day but it's fine i hope she makes you happy who ever you end up with just know I REALLY LOVE YOUU AND NEVER WILL STOP TOO

I used to laaalaaa luvvv youuuu now I want you happy in another relationship so you let me be ??? YOURE FUN I GUESS tehe

I lied. I lied every single day, I make up lies I live lies. Is this a lie? Probably although you know.

Neglect you moron as I should of sooner. Many of the multiple men in my life live up to the standards that you don’t.
Say my sentences again, it is so fucking hot.

we could have worked it out if you realized there was a problem. im so angry at you for what you did to me. you ripped away my happiness and stomped on it. why cant you realize that you need help in order to get better. i just fucking miss you man. we could have been happy.

i have your shirt hanging in my closet. the smell of you is fading from it. this is the color of the shirt. i miss you. please come back.

i still put my phone on airplane mode and text you all the things i’d want to say, but i can never bring myself to send it.

J’étais amoureuse mais je ne pouvais pas le voir. L’autre fois j’ai failli tout te dire. Je voulais tout te dire. Le pire c’est que si tu savais que j’aime les filles, je te dégoûterai. Je pense que tu l’as toujours su au fond.

Do you still play with your hair when you are nervous? Do you still have the smile you'd give me when you saw me?

i miss you, i wish i told you the words i wanted to say, i’m so in love with you, the fact i can’t love anyone like i love you is crazy to me, i really hope we’re soulmates and we’ll come back to each other.

i loved you. i loved you much and you made feel the happiest i’d been in a long time in only three days. sorry for not being brave enough.

I know that I ended things 3 years ago, but I want you to know that you are my person and always will be

You knew my fear of losing you, yet you made it a priority to let me go. Thank you for teaching me to love myself. I love you

You taught me what it feels like to have a person as my second home. I forgive you and I will let go of the resentment.

i miss you more than anything. i miss your smile, your jokes and your presence. i was always scared i was going to lose you like i did in the spring. why did you ever do that? we were best friends and she was someone who didn't accept you for who you are. you have changed so much because of her. please be safe, you still mean the world to me.

i still think youre perfect. i didnt realize i liked you at the time but you made me realize i was gay

i miss our friendship so so much. but even if we tried, we can’t become friends again. too much of me is hurting

Its like you're the sun to my moon; being around you brings out my light side, and the best in me. We're friends, but you will never know how much more you mean to me.

Im still mad that you didn't love me. But I'm not mad at you I'm mad at the world for making me feel it by myself.

in honor of ur fav color ofc, i love you and i hope you feel the same way back. i think about u every single second of the days passing by and i wonder what you think of me. i'm sitting here listening to supermodel by sza and typing this hoping one day we can be together and yeah. you definitely caused me a ton of pain in middle school and you wouldn't think as kids in middle school, people can actually feel real pain but i felt. im glad we back and i miss u every second and i hate it but i love it at the same time. it't annoying that i love you but i guess my feelings just love you a ton

hiii i love u and i miss u a lot & i'm wishing we had matching lego necklaces and milkshake cow pillowpets

I’m sorry that the me you created in your mind didn’t live up to the me I was in real life. I really did tried

I’m sorry that the me you created in your mind didn’t live up to the me I was in real life. I really did tried

I know that what I did wasn't the best option, but you were becoming someone that I didn't want in my life

i loved you and you played me. i always wished i was the one you would think and talk about all the time but it was always her.

You broke me a long time ago but not a day goes by when I don’t think of you and what we could have been. I miss what we used to be.

it’s been a little over a year and i still can’t stop thinking about you. no matter what happens with other people i’ll always look for you in them. i miss you so much. i’ll always wonder what i did wrong. i wish i could just forget you but i hope you’re doing well.

I love you so fucking much, I'm missing you every second you're not around.
But for you I'm just a friend, right?

You recently came out as bi and said you have liked more girls than guys and I’m scared you had or have a crush on me but I don’t know how to ask or if I do I’m sorry

you will always be in the back of my thoughts and even though you aren’t mine, you have a soft spot in my heart

i learn to miss u more everyday. but im also learning to let go and just forget, bc if i forget maybe ill think it never happened, we never kissed, we never talked, we never shared our life stories, and maybe i never loved you. but i cant forget no matter how hard i try u r always on my mind. it been 7 months since we cut off no other relationships work with me, bc ur always in my head. and seeing u everyday doesnt make it better bc i see u happy with someone who loves u the way i do.

i think its normal for me to love people more than they could ever love me. that never stopped me though

You rlly fucked my entire perception of myself up and I don’t know how to get myself back, but I’m glad you did. I’m finally over you but I dread the thought of another girl having to meet you

Fuiste mi primer amor, no fue correspondido y acabaste saliendo con mi mejor amiga (que no sabía que me gustabas). Caí en depresión, veros los dos juntos me partía el alma pero me alegraba ver a mi amiga feliz. Decidí sobreponer su felicidad sobre la mía. Pero seguía amándote. Aunque doliera. Aunque sabía que no te gustaba, y no te caía bien. Aunque sabía que no me soportabas. Dolía, pero mi corazón seguía allí.

i cant stop thinking about u. ur the only thing thats ever on my mind. i miss seeing ur face every day. i hope ur well

I just want to hold you. I just want you to fall asleep in my arms. Even though we’ve both never said it, I’m sure you feel the same way.

Eres la persona a la que más he querido y odiado a la vez. Aún así tu me has enseñado lo que es querer

I hate to know that whenever you have a girlfriend we will stop talking and you will push me aside, but I will always love you and I will try to be your friend

tonight you broke me more than i ever thought i could be broken. maybe it wasn't just that one thing you said to be around... an hour and 15 minutes ago, but everything's been building up. i am SO sorry what i have to do for me is going to hurt me. you probably wont be hurt though so that's all that matters. YOU'RE all that matters. literally as long as you're happy... im not happy but i feel better. i know everyone says that but now i know it's true.
there's a lump in the back of my throat and im trying not to cry writing this. my phone is beside me and it hasn't lit up in and hour and 20 minutes. it's only 11:00pm there. what're you up to? because i know you're awake. i just wish you would be awake with me. you know i stay up for you? sure. we both f-ed up our sleep schedule over the summer and were like "awe"... but i still f it up. for you. lol. wtf ever. im done.
bye bebe. i love you. still.