Unsent messages to MICHAEL

I wasn’t good enough for you. She is. She is skinner, prettier, smarter. You choose her over me. I was your „second”. You only wanted nudes from me. I was only body for you. You were soo nice and you told me that you like me sm, i remember all things you said to me THAT night.. You told me that you care about me. Once, you helped me when i had my first panic attack.. do you remember that? Broo i told you bout my trauma, and you still left. It was all a fcking lie. You choose her and you will always chose her. She is heather. I heard what you told her about me.. she told me. I cried myself to sleep every night after this. Im not mad.. okay maybe sometimes i am. i told you how much i hate myself. I hate myself every day more (because of my trauma) and you still left and did what you did... bro.. i trusted you. If you show something to your friends, i will k1ll myself and you know that.. im so scared that something will flow up. I wrote a su1cidal letter few weeks ago and you are there... im not going to do this idk, but you know. I miss you so much. Now its 1am and i need to go to sleep, but i cant. I cant stop thinking about you. Idk if you know that but i wrote a song for you about how much you hurted me. something. But i didnt finish it. Goodnight michael. Have fun with her:))

you moved on after two weeks and that completely broke me because if you could move on that fast then i must not have meant anything to you.

fuck you. you gave me hope and let me imagine our future together, knowing it wouldn't happen. you never cared, you never loved me. i was young and intoxicated by the idea of you. you are the biggest mistake i ever made and you will always be my biggest regret.

i miss you and it sucks. i wish i could see u and talk u again but u probably don’t want that. why did u have to say that? i wish we ended on good terms bc then maybe u could have celebrated my birthday with me and i could have celebrated ur birthday. i can’t go to any of our places wo thinking about our memories and it sucks bc i just want to be talking to u again. i want to tell u about my day and i want to hear about urs. i know that i have to let u go and maybe a couple of years from now i’ll see u again and we can reconnect but for now i have to get over u and trust me that’s the last thing i want. bye. i hope u have a great life and i hope u r as happy as u can be.

I can't believe you couldn't tell I liked you. How obvious does a girl need to be in elementary school, blockhead?!

You meant the world to me. You still do, but we both know it's too late for us. I love you MJ. Forever and always.

it wasn’t in god’s plan for us to end up together, but know that i think of you every single day, despite of all these years

from Raina.
I love you. and i am so sorry for everything. for the pain you have been feeling. i wish i could take it away. you showed me another side of the world without even leaving. please i know this might be selfish of me, but do not leave. you are the Finch to my violet. you saved me in ways you do not even know. i need you. i need you to do dumb teenage things with me. i need you to help me. you give me motivation to live the life i have always wanted and i want you to do it with me so please do it with me. please do not leave me. ill never forgive myself for things i have done that hurt you. and i am sorry.

I miss the old us so much. I wish you never hurt me so we didn't have to keep hurting each other. I'm not happy anymore but I'll still love you forever.

i’m so sorry i wasn’t ready for you. you deserve way more than what i was giving you. it hurts me too

i understand. i didnt sleep yet, i cant stop crying, i fucked up. i do not know what to do anymore and im sorry.

i'm sorry I hurt you, but I did it before u hurted me first I just wasn't ready I wish you saw me in a different way.

Maybe I fell too hard too fast, but years later I still care for you deeper than I have anyone else. I really miss you. It sucks. I miss how close we were. I hope you're doing OK though, and know more about who you are.

i feel so lonely man i dont know what to do. i know i have people i can lean on but jesus i cant help but feel the way i do, really. i know it will be okay, i guarantee it will be. but it still hurts.

•I want u SO bad, but I’ll never forget the way your eyes were shining when u told me u two got together. I’ve never seen u so happy.. It hurts like hell, but rn I just hope she’ll treat u right. U deserve the world.

God its been over a year since we spoke. I can’t forget or forgive, but I miss you so much. I don’t even know if you still love me.

I left because you sexually harassed me for a year and gaslighted me and your friends. I got tired of pretending that type of behaviour was okay. Also stop sending these cringe anonymous messages

Hello b, love you lots. You'll probably never see this because you have better things to do than this... your name is also so common lol. I googled my name on this and nothing showed up :((( You are currently in the shower as I'm typing this but I am so happy you are here. I'm grateful that your surgery went well. I'm scared for what the future holds us as it seems that we'll have to be physically apart due to work, school etc (basically future things). I wonder when we'll want to settle and whether we'll agree to the same lifestyle... I foresee myself having a crisis about my future really soon but I'm glad I'm still spending my life with you xxxxxx

Ur popularity mattered more than me at my worst. Even though we hadn’t even spoken in months your birthday came around I messaged you hb bcz I still care. Months later and you haven’t even opened it

I know you say you don’t remember everything we said to each other but I hope you are just saying that so your friends never find out :( I miss u

sometimes you hurt me but that’s okay, i know i overthink a lot but i really love you, you’re my yellow :)

i wanted to drive at night with you, fit in your world. i was excited that i found my person to dance in the rain with. but now i've moved on. please be safe on the road.

I think that part of me deep down will always love you. I wish I had the courage to tell you... I guess that the idea of us is better than what could have been. Sometimes we let our person go too soon, other times it’s a step in the journey. I truly believe we will meet again; until then, I love you.

i would have died for you. i loved you more than anything on this world. the sad part is that i still do and you never really loved me

i’m afraid that our love was the greatest i will ever experience. life feels less colorful without you

i miss you more and more each day. come back. your smile lightens up the mood. please, i’m asking for one thing, come back.

when you told me you would beat me if i were a boy i wished with every bone i had that you would've just beaten me dead right then and there.

You manipulated me into doing things I didn’t want to, and I can’t break up with you because I’m attached in every way and I don’t know how.

i wish i'd had the guts to kiss you at the dance or on your birthday or even just to ask you out.
it sounds weird but i hope that on those nights i was stupid enough that maybe you could tell how i felt just by looking at me.

honestly after everything you've done to me.. all i want to know is why. then again you never gave me a full answer to anything. I've even unblocked you..

I will never get tired of supporting you, helping you, and loving you, but I can't always be there. You have to know when to do what you need to do.

i've always wondered why you used me for so long. or did you love me and just fell out of love? thank you for teaching me that love hurts. i'll never forget it.

Part of me hopes you get clean so you can be happy, the other part hopes your addiction takes you to hell.

I felt as if I could never get close enough to you. I wish I could crawl inside your heart so you could just keep me safe forever.

hellooo. yup our bond is really nice and i really treasure our friendship it's really cool and you are such a sweet and supportive friend ily. i really appreciate what we have and how i can tell u anythinh god bless u. ok goodnight

dear michael,
you were my first love and maybe even my last. i saw so much in you and i put so much into you. i thought you would be my one and only and we would be together forever. just like we always promised. but nothing in my life ever turns out to be the way i think it will. you cheated on me. three different times. i tried to forgive you but you just got more and more toxic and manipulative and you stopped trying. i dont know what i ever did to deserve it. so i left. and the pull and want of you came back and i got back with you. and i just couldn't take it anymore, and i left. for real. you promised youd change but thats what you promised every single other time too. what was i supposed to believe. should i have taken another chance on you? i'll never know. it may be toxic of me but i hope you never move on, and i hope i find you in the future because i dont think i can ever stop loving you no matter how bad it seems.. i need you lol

I've always missed the times were you made fun of my height or during spanish class when you would rest your head on the desk and I would play with your hair; you looked so peaceful. I miss those times but now I have to learn to let you go because I want to see myself doing something I know will make me happy. I can't always be running back to you knowing that you didn't feel the same way about me or even thought of reaching out to me; so now I know that I can't always rely on people to always be there for me. Goodbye.

i know what you mean. i am confused and everything is a lot right now, but we never know what the future might hold for us

thank you for staying up and talking about anything with me, and waiting for me so we could watch the movie together at the same time

The fact that i still miss our night drives after you broke my heart so many times is hurting more every day

what if everyone hates me because of this. i hate me for this. and i know zach would and know you are not feeling great about this. im so sorry im like this

yes. and that makes me horrible, i started liking you again once me and zach broke up and you were here for me and we talked 24/7 i feel horrible i am so sorry i am such a bad person

i know that it is wrong for me so wrong so wrong to do what i am doing but i broke up with you because i was scared of not having time for you and committing. then i got with your best friend and that was horrible and throughout our relationship even though it was nice i always had you in the back of my mind and that is what brought me down because feelings for you still were somewhere inside of me and i know that that is so wrong i know it is so wrong and i am so sorry im a horrible person i know i am

sometimes i wonder what it would be like if we would fall in love. but i will never have that chance again will i

hi bitchass i miss you and our friendship. german was always so fun. i regret everything we did over snap and i still don't understand why out of all people you pressured me. just know i woulda gave u anything j bc i have so much love for you. maybe its j me i know you have a bunch of girls on ur ass but just know if you ever need me you know where to go.

I miss you. I hope you are doing well, friend. I still listen to the Her’s and the Drums. Thank you. I hope we can talk again.

i searched their name on here and i just know all the lovely confessions are from you. i search my name- nothing. i meant nothing.

what if we could be something. what if we could have a great love. what if we jumped instead of looking off the cliff wondering what could be.

i wish i could look into ur pretty eyes knowing u love me. i wish i could see ur gorgeous smile knowing it’s bc of me.

pretty pink huh? anyways i gave you five chances took you back every time when YOU broke up with me good luck finding someone like me i can guarantee you no one is as stupid as i am. i loved you if we hadn't broke up we'd be at like a year, oh and another thing i was never controlling or toxic you were just kind of a cheater and liar, i will believe myself over you any day i said it before and i will say it again. i have had literal proof that girls liked you and ive even had people say it soo.. kinda sad even then i was still being treated like shit when i needed "a reason" for you to remove them but apparently my feelings weren't reason enough, yeah i found my self worth and i've already found people better then you so good luck finding someone who can replace me.