Unsent messages to JAKE

you better be my forever. i love you always my love <3

In next life, I wouldn’t push you away.

Thank you for staying away from me and letting me find my peace

Don’t let me go. I miss you. Catch up next time you’re in town?

i love you so much, you make me the happiest, always.

I’m so madly in love with you

i love you more than you know.

i wish u loved me the way i loved u

I miss you so
Much, please come back bug x

don't think, just text meeeeeeeee

I hope you will get the diagnose youre searching for

is it too late to talk?

There is no next life.

i acc like u sm but ur impossible to read

i think you are the loveliest ever, sorry if i’m difficult <3

you have a nice heart.

I can’t wait to marry you❤️

i wanted it to be you

i know she has your heart but know you'll always have mine

I love you more than words - thank you for being in my life

Miss you

I think you’re my soulmate

I don’t miss you. I miss who you were.

When will you open your eyes?

i think a part of me wanted us to be more than friends

I’m grieving over the person I was when I loved you.

i wonder if ill ever be a person to u instead of an object

I think we would have been really great friends

im sorry i didnt tell you earlier

I will always wait for you my sweet boy <3

whyd u do me like that bro

Finally finding peace without you

I wish you loved me like you loved her.

i like you =)

i hope you still think about me sometimes, just sometimes, that’s all. i hope life is treating you right, i hope you decided to grow your out instead of cutting it all off with lol - i’m always here for you dummy

i wish you knew how much you mean to me.... its way more than words can ever describe. You are the person that makes everything feel better. you deserve the world

I often wonder how you’re doing and if you still think of me. I know you won’t ever want me back but I love you regardless.

I will never let you back in my heart as you do the same thing every time and you do it with different girls

I never got jealous of you and other girls because I knew you’d never love them the same as me. I can see it in your eyes my love.

I am just gonna leave this here. You are confusing and led me on... but we are not gonna talk about it.

I love you more than words can describe. You are my best friend and the love of my life. I will never ever leave you because leaving you would be leaving the best thing that has ever happened in my life. Sometimes it may seem like I’m being mean but its really just because I care so much about you and I just want our future together to be perfect. I love you the absolute most. You are perfect in every single way and there is no one in the world that could ever take me away from you.

i want to tell you how i feel, but im scared. ive been in love with you for 2 years now. i miss you every day.

It hurts that we’re moving in together but only as friends. I hope one day you love me as much as I love you.

Do you remember the night after we admitted we loved each other? After spending 2 weeks apart from Christmas, do you remember the first night we spent back together? Do you know how long it took for me to finally admit how i felt, to myself, not even just to you. i dont know why i keep getting sad, idk if i feel like im worthy of someone like you loving me, i never knew what it was like to feel unquestionably loved until i met you. maybe its because i've never experienced that, i dont know. something still makes me sad, and now i think ive grown up as a rose with continuous thorns in my back, i had too much rain that drowned me instead of sunshine to make me grow and now love has become such a cursed thing for me, i always truly believe it'll go wrong to the point where i think now i'm intentionally trying to make it go wrong as a self sabotage just to protect myself, but i'm hurting others along the way. when i'm with you, i feel the rawest emotions, i've never ever felt something so intense in my life. please never ever doubt that i love you, i love you with every fucking bone and muscle in my body, but my heart is just working quicker than my brain and i cannot grasp the concept that this is healthy and that i deserve this. Part of this makes me want to push you away, but because i dont want to hurt you, and that's why i've always avoided people just because i dont think i will ever get better, i dont think my perception on love will ever changed. i think i'm genuinely so unwell mentally, and i dont think my mind works normally at all. I feel every emotion 10x deeper than the usual person and i dont know why. i want you to shout at me, scream that you love me but tell me to fuck off, i want to hurt so badly, and then feel you push me against a wall and kiss me. It's not healthy i know, and i don't even know how to escape that and i really, truly don't know if that mindset of mine will ever change. Happiness makes me feel sad, and i dont think my thoughts are normal as i've only ever met one person that feels someone similar. i want to bleed, bleed, bleed and bleed. I just want this emotion to pour out of my body until i physically can't get anything else out. You've done everything for me, and i don't know what i did in a past lifetime to ever deserve you, you've done my psoriasis treatments for me, cuddled me whilst i've cried and cried for hours. you've seen my bipolar episodes and not even battered an eyelid, you really really love me, don't you?
I love you too. Always.

I loved you from the start, and will love you till the end. I only hope one day my head will accept that you love me too.

Do you really hate me? Or do you just have no justification for the way you treated me so you made me out to be the bad guy in hopes other people wouldn’t realize you treat women like shit?

I fucking suck. I'm an awful person, and I left you so suddenly. I guess I just cared more about something happening in my life than I did about how much I actually loved you. I'm sorry.

“hi hi hi” “Hi” “what’s goin on” “Nothing” “relatable, you went to lehman jackson right?” “Yep” i’ll never forget our first conversation. i was so excited that the cutest boy in the school was actually talking to me. i’m so glad we met, because i don’t know where i’d be if we didn’t. i truly believe you were a gift from God, because He knew i needed someone like you. i love you so much, i’d do anything for you. i mean that. you are perfect in my eyes, no matter how much pain you cause me. i’ll never forget the feeling i had the first time you left. it was like you took a piece of me with you. i was in so much pain and when you came back it instantly went away. i think that this purple represents my love for you because it’s a dark and sullen looking version of a happy color (the sadness), but if you stare at it for a while it’s actually quite pretty (the happiness). i hope that my heart is right about you.

I don't think that we'd ever work out, we're such a toxic mix. but I still love you, and think of when I drove down to your campus at midnight just to spend time with you, only to fuck it up in the end

I’ll never understand how you went from loving me to hurting me. I wish I could’ve been the girl you wanted...but I’m tired of trying to be her.