Unsent messages to CHARLIE

I like you a lot, and Im pretty sure you feel the same way but thats somethint I’ll never be completely sure about, ik we dont have much chance to talk anymore like we used to, I do still think about you.

Even though you hurt me like i have never been hurt before, i will always have love for you. We were never meant to be but thank you for the good times. You taught me how to love and im thankful for that.

i realised that you never actually wanted me. all you wanted was the idea of me. you don’t care about me enough to continue things and i know that if another girl liked you you’d be gone in a second. it was never going to work. you never matched my energy. i’d say something i felt really emotional and heartfelt and most times i would get an “ah” or a one sentence reply. we’re not the same kind of people and it hurts that i can never change you to be the person i wanted you to be. i just have to let you go and it sucks. i realised that you never really cared about me emotionally and were always looking out for yourself. but it’s fine. you’re a sweet guy . i wish you nothing but the best. lots of love

at the time I thought you were cool but now I’m more mature I realise you manipulated me and you pressured me into doing loads of things I wish I hadn’t done. I hate you for lying to me and breaking my trust. Do you know how hard it is to trust people now. I see you with ur new girlfriend one after the other in quick succession. I hate myself for being one of those. I hate you because I know what you’ll do to them and I feel bad for them because they were once me

you fucked me up so badly. i loved you so fucking much. you where the only person who made me feel special. and you left. and when you left it felt like you took a part of me with you and i’ve never gotten it back. i don’t know if i ever will

You hurt me so much but I can’t get you off my mind. It’s been about a year and you’re still my main thought every day and it’s so fucking sad and the fact you said you would kill me if you could hurts me immensely. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck. You. You hurt me so much, you made me believe I could never fall in love again, and I can’t. Right people wrong time.

I could write for hours about how much you hurt me, and yet how much I would still want to be with you. It wouldn’t fit on one of these.

i love you, i have for months , it will never be the same as it was but i often dream of us together like we were before , but you are happy with her

I idolized you more then anything but you taught me how to be my own person and to stand my ground,you helped me more then anyone and I know I didn't say this much but I love you

I really just want to be with you right now. I can't stop thinking about just laying with you and talking for hours on end

i wish u were still in my life . u did everything for me and i miss u more then anything . i hope u still love me like i love u

I listen to the song you wrote me all the time. It hurts so much to know that you don’t mean those words anymore

i dont know how you feel. i dont understand you. i want to know you charlie. but i dont know if you want to know me.

I like you so much and I am so grateful that I met you. But the thought of losing you is so scary to me. I overthink so much and I hate myself for it. I just want to allow myself to be happy with you. You literally asked me to be your girlfriend two days ago and instead of being happy as I should be, I have stumbled into a blur of doubt and worry and overthinking. I just want be happy. I want to be better. I want to be better for myself. I want to be better for you. Believe me I am trying, like really trying. I know you won't ever see this and that's okay. I hope that I get to a place where you don't need to. A place where I don't worry about everything, where I am not anxious and I am genuinely happy through and through. And I really hope you are still there with me.

I loved u ngl, I told u stuff bout me that I haven’t told other ppl and had full trust in u, nw your gone I feel empty inside u where one of the only things I lived for nw I’m all alone and I miss u n want u back. X

I know you had a tinder account while we were together and I have the proof in my phone.. revenge is a bitch

you broke me, and ruined me with the one thing i trusted you with. and you knew that. if only i would have the courage to tell everyone else

You make me feel so special and then just drop me. I think about you so much and it’s truly exhausting. I tried so hard to be “ just friends with you “ but I can’t do it and know you can’t either.. I see the way you look at me , no one looks at someone like that and it doenst mean anything. I think if you love somebody let them go and if they really love you they’ll come back , and you DID come back but now your fucking confusing me and it makes me so unhappy. Please I know deep down you do and I know that somewhere somehow you know we are meant to be.

i dont think we'll ever be able to recreate what we had. you have a new girlfriend and yes shes prettier but i know she cant make you laugh like i could. i kind of miss getting into fights with you and breaking up a million times. one time i was so close to calling you and asking you to come over but ill never tell you that.

at this point i’m starting to wonder if time or fate is really on our side. i’d like to believe it is. i’d like to think that every birthday candle, lost eyelash, or 11:11 is the universe bringing us one step closer together. it’s been so long that i’m starting to doubt it.

i miss you. text me. i want to talk to you again. i dont know what i want. maybe i love you. but you dont care and i should know it.

i thought it was real. i really thought you liked me. but it was too good to be true. i know its not my fault but it feels like ive done something wrong. like youre bored of me. i gave you all the good music and then you left. i dont know if you were just 'using me' for my music or if you felt something too. i dont think you ever liked me, not like i liked you. i dont know if im annoying you or if i should message you. i think i really like you. but you dont feel the same way. you couldnt give a shit charlie. and it hurts because i really thought we would be something. but we probably wont be. not now, maybe not ever. i dont know, i dont want to believe it. you confuse me, you send such mixed signals and we probably wouldnt be good together. but i want to try. if only we could. if only.

my sweet love; i have loved you, and i understand you don’t love me. but we all want things we cannot have.

i still feel the same way i did about you however many years ago. the only problem is that i know you feel the same way you felt about me.

you ruined my favourite song, my favourite place and my heart. I will still love you forever no matter what it was just a matter of i loved you more than you loved me. maybe we can try again later on in life when we’re both ready. i love you R x

You were there for me and I won’t ever forget you, I love you and it hurts me to admit that to anyone. I wish you could be mine but I can’t lose you to a relationship

My first kiss memory will always have you calling me a bitch right before it, and I will never forgive you.

I’m glad you cheated on me. I came out stronger and I now know my worth. You will never love the way I can

Hii, you probably won't see this message but if you do im just gonna let you know that if you went to St Giles in Uk before then this message is for you. Honestly all your friends were mostly rude to me and you were always so nice to me, i dont even remember how we became friends but im glad that we were. I don't know how u even were friends with me because i was honestly just one of those shy girls and u were apart of the "popular" kids i guess. You were literally the first friend i made there and i didn't expect to catch feelings for you but after quarantine when we started school i realised how much i liked you lol, i saw you at school like 3 weeks ago and i think you did too because you looked at me sjsksk sorry im probably being too cringy right now. Ily even though you don't but it's okay ✨

i hate that i love you. loved you. i’m not sure but what i do know is you will always have a special place in my heart no matter the circumstance

You said you liked me but I think I was in love with you. I still am. I need you now, but I don't think you even care.

i thought it was real. but it wasnt, i dont know why you played with my emotions. was it a joke to you? you led me on, then decided something changed. i dont know what. i never will.

U were in my dream last night and I didn’t wake up sad. After everything u have done to me, I forgive u

hey, i miss you. I always wonder what we could've been. So many what ifs. In the end. I really hope something comes out of this. I hope that i didnt waste 2 years of my life being in love with you just for you to be a highschool memory. Maybe you will just be a highschool memory. But i wish there was more to our story. You ruined relationships for me. Relationships that couldve happened even. In the end. I always chose you. I dont even think im a choice for you. Which hurts. Youd be my first choice without doubt, without hesitation. I love you. I know that. But what i also know. Is that i need to get over you. So i think for now, its ok to love you. Its ok to think about you its ok to care about you. Its ok. Its ok to still love you. It just shows, that maybe you shouldve chosen me in the end. Because out of everyone, id be by your side. Always, forever, and in the next life after this. I'll always be there for you. I love you charlie. I really do. Thank you for everything.

What happen to being soul mates?
U hurt me, u broke me, u were horrible but i still want u. I was in love. U were in a daze.

I’m not over u. I can’t keep watching u be okay without me. I want u back. But there’s no chance i can get u back.

what you did to me and put me through was so unfair, yet i constantly put up with it over and over. how dare you threaten me and feed me lies when you knew would make it harder for me to escape you, you and your strange ways of loving me, holding me, kissing me. you don't deserve this.. any of me and you never did. the things i did for you even when i didn't want too, i think about constantly, it isn't fair i didn't want to hurt you, but you left me with no choice. i think about those choices daily and all it does is worry me and stress me out. why did you try and ruin me? i thought you loved me.. cause i know for a fact i loved you and never would do any of the such to you.

i never liked you or even loved you so thank god we didn't date but I hate you you got everyone to call me a whore even after there was proof your bestfriend cheated on me

Was it that easy to forget? A year Charlie, and you gave it up for a girl. I know you should've but why is it so easy for you? Why was it just something that slipped out of your mouth? All those memories we made, just down the drain for her. Thanks I guess.

I wish you hadn’t acted like it was nothing personal. I spent forever thinking maybe you felt our personalities didn’t match, but now everything I hear about your new girlfriend sounds like it’s being said about me. She and I are so similar we could be the same person...every hour the question goes round my head and I can’t sleep. Why did you pick her and not me? Why, why, why?

i miss used to waking up every morning and being excited to go to school only to see you. whether i’d even get the chance to speak to you or not it gave me the joy and happiness. i don’t miss you now, but who you were.

I loved you right from the start. I'll never forget who you were. I love you, despite who you've become.

i heard your favorite song today. i never knew the title of that song, i just knew you always played it. i was walking through a friends house. they were watching some tv show, yellowstone maybe? and the song started playing. at first i was sure but as it kept going, i became more sure. i asked them what it was called. they told me it was by whiskey meyers. i said thanks, i think they thought i was crazy. but i went home and looked up whiskey meyers and started searching for the song. eventually i found it. once i listened to it in full, i cried. it was so you. i think ill always associate stone by whiskey meyers with you. or atleast the better parts of you. its been 347 days, and you still manage to hurt me. and i still manage to forgive you, and want you to come back.

i could hate you as much as i want to but i have loved you since 7th grade and that hasnt changed since now. ive always had some feeings for you till this day. all im asking for is for you to just be by my side :)

i know our friendship is mostly jokes and no showing of emotions, but would it really hurt to tell each other that we loved each other? i love you, do you even love me?

I still think of you at times. You are the only person that made me feel like I was on top of the world. I wonder if you still think of me.

i know it’s not my place anymore, but you will forever be my always.meet you in another lifetime loser

I still think of you and what you did for me. A piece of me will always love you. You mean the world to me still.
I still miss you sometimes but no one is really that surprised.

hey, just want to let you know;you’re perfect in every way, your smiles makes my days better amd your eyes are everything but dull smh, i hope one day i can call you mine :,)

i love you but i’m so miserable. the emotional stress you put me under is fucking insane. people beg me to leave you but i can’t. you always say you’re trying you’re best but you never change. recently you’ve started to scare me. you’ve started to say things that remind me of the people i hate the most. i know you think i’m overdramatic but i am SO patient with you, maybe more so than you deserve. i pray to god that you’ll get better. i pray to god.