gosh where do i begin? you made me feel heard and even though you took hours to reply, i really loved hearing from you. you made me laugh every time you talked and i love your dumb act and nothing will even compare to that. i wish we could’ve talked longer, and i wished i screenshotted every lovely thing you sent me. the only thing I have from you is that stupid “if you were closer i’d take you out on a date with me” thing. seriously, i wish i wasn’t sick that day so i could have a better memory of it. you aren’t my first love but you’re my first favourite guy who i genuinely cared about, and would wait forever for you to text back. hope you’re having fun watching anime you nerd, and i hope you never see dis ??

Hey, you fucked me up I didn’t realise it until now but you made me so fucking insecure so fuck you :)

You kept me going for so many years and I’m so thankful that you were in my life for the time you were.

The love you gave was so pure and good. I'm so happy you are still one of my closest friends. You deserve the world.

i love you and you're always on my mind. you're my yellow and im so glad i met you, thank you for being there for me

i could never fully remove all feelings for you. i still cant. i just knew i deserved better than what you were willing to give.

i do not like you, honestly you’ve badgered me at every turn and I am sick of it. please stop saying that ocd is not a real illness. it is and it butchers me every hour of every day. sometimes i wonder why you even talk to me? a is so sweet and I don’t know why she likes to be around you.

You were my first love, although it was a young type of love. Thank you for being my friend despite me having an obvious crush on you for four years.

you left before i even got the chance to find out whether or not we could have been something. now i feel nothing except longing for the possibilities of us.

I did truly love you, but as time has gone on, I’ve realized how amazing life has been without you. To be completely honest, you seem so full of yourself, as if your positive of who I am based on what, like 3 short conversations we’ve had since we broke up?? I bet you still think I’d coming running back if you ever gave me the chance but I wouldn’t. Your name used to bring me happiness but now all it does is annoy me. I don’t love you anymore so stop thinking everything I do and or post it’s for you, it’s not. I have two full time jobs AND I’m redoing my classes so I can get into vet school so why the hell do you think I have time to whine over a BOY. I know you went through your own shit as a kid and now you feel all high and mighty, but your not perfect matt. Get the fuck over yourself and pay attention to your girlfriend.

You want someone who is exactly like me but you don’t want me. It’s sad because I love you more than I love myself.

After all this time I still don’t understand why she was more worthy. You were the first person I wanted. I guess it was just bad timing.

for some reason i wasn’t enough, i did what i could but u didn’t want me. i understand this now and i’m not angry anymore sometimes i miss u but only the thought of you, not what u put me through

Te extraño demasiado. Eres malo para mí, pero sigo teniendo en mi mente pensamientos que no me dejan en paz y creo que son el único lugar en los que puedo ser feliz contigo. Te volviste completamente una mierda de persona y solo vez a tu conveniencia. Nunca te importé y así seguirá siendo hasta el día en el que madures y te des cuenta de todo lo que siento.

i..i miss the way it felt whenever you held me. the way your hands felt on my skin, the way you'd press your soft lips on my forehead. i miss us, i hope she makes you happy..i still love you, i never broke my promise.

Te extraño demasiado. Eres malo para mí, pero sigo teniendo en mi mente pensamientos que no me dejan en paz y creo que son el único lugar en los que puedo ser feliz contigo. Te volviste completamente una mierda de persona y solo ves a tu conveniencia. Nunca te importé y así seguirá siendo hasta el día en el que madures y te des cuenta de todo lo que siento.

Me enteré que fuiste a una fiesta y te encontraste con tu ex. No somos nada y no te puedo reclamar por eso.
Escribo esto para dejarte en claro que me duele el hecho de que yo -siendo “tu mejor amiga" - hayas puesto una excusa y ni siquiera llegaste a la mía. Te esperé y simplemente dejaste esto como si nada hubiera pasado. Me duele aunque no lo creas porque tenía la esperanza de verte cara a cara y abrazarte después de tanto tiempo.

¿Recuerdas cuando jugabamos a concurso de miradas?
Y saber que cuando veía los tuyos me ponía nerviosa y roja como un tomate. Unas tremendas ganas de gritar lo que sentía en ese momento por ti se acumulaban en mi cabeza.
No es fácil ser feliz teniendo ese tipo de recuerdos en mi cabeza. Extraño esos momentos y tal vez ni siquiera te caigo bien, pero yo te quiero y mucho.
Espero que algún día reacciones y te percates de todo lo que he hecho por ti, hasta los más mínimos detalles.

After 8 years, you chose my best friend over me, and I will never forgive you. You can't just walk into my life when you want. you selfish little prick.

I am not mad that you don't want me, I'm mad that you sometimes act as you do, and you take advantage of the soft spot that I have for you because you know I will always come back to you.

i knew it. i knew from the start that something was gonna go wrong, it was too good to be true. i hate you.

hey matthew. i really loved you. you fucking piece of shit, you had to ruin it and cheat on me. fuck you.

my 5th grade self would be so excited that we are finally dating. from being my first crush to hopefully my last. when i say it. I’m gonna mean it. I’d wait for you forever

I see the way you interact with her and I can't help but feel stupid thinking I was someone special in your life. Don't worry, not long from now I'll learn to let go of what we used to have. Nevertheless, thank you.

Thankyou for being the only guy who ever liked more than just the idea of me. I'm so sorry I hurt you.

It really hurt me. When you showed up to the show with Ashley and pretended like you didn’t see me. That really fucking hurt. It hurt even worse when I still gave you a chance after that. All you ended up doing was hurting me. And even so, I can’t bring myself to hate you.

we never ended up grabbing food and now i don’t think we’ll ever see each other or talk again and that makes me sad

I just wanna be friends again, we were able to laugh and everything was light-hearted. Treat her well.

Its been two years and I still think about you. You were a piece of shit. But I still hope you find happiness

You were my first love and you leaving me hurt me so bad. You just seemed to move on and forget about me so easily that it hurts. I hope you live an amazing life bc you taught me lesson of closet people to you are the ones who hurt you the most. I love you and miss you but ik that my feelings for you will slowly get less and less. You will always hold a special place in my heart. Goodbye Matthew
Live the world to your fullest

I let you back into my life after you broke me down and you somehow still manage to break me again. And yet I still wish you happiness

I do wonder whether those I love you’s you said had any meaning...safe to say they meant the world to me even if I didn’t say it back

I guess it's best to let you move on at this point. I guess you're doing way better and I should be happy for you if you are. Thank you for being my something good, bud. I'm sorry I couldn't be the same for you. Never forget that you always deserve the best, alright?

i miss you so much but i don't wanna disrupt your peace as well. maybe one day i'll learn to stop missing you.

It wasn't "school". It was because you had to tell all your close friends about whatever was going on between us. It wasn't their relationship, it was ours. I couldn't even go shopping without the girl cashing me out asking me about us. I didn't even know her! It was also the fact that you were talking to another girl at the same time. It was because you'd get so jealous and possessive even though we weren't exclusive or anything. I hope you're different now. I'd feel sorry for any other girl you refuse to listen to.

You will always have a place in my heart. You were the first guy I truly trusted and what hurts is that I can't hate you because you never did anything wrong.

I think the reason we didn't work out is because you're scared of commitment to a relationship. I wish we did.

I love you so much it's unhuman, I want you with me forever even though I doubt you will stay. I will always love you no matter what

and yet i still don’t send these in the fear that you may still see them because you always know if it’s me or not

Hey,I was into for like 1 year and a half but things went wrong when you and my BFF started dating. It still hurts this but I hope you have found the one for u!❤️

i just don’t understand why i won’t let myself be with you
your all i need and more but i just can’t...why am i like this
i’m sorry i never meant to break your heart i know lockdown is so tough for you
i’m only a call away

Hey,I was into for like 1 year and a half but things went wrong when you and my BFF started dating. It still hurts this but I hope you have found the one for u!❤️

you helped me get out of a rough time and now ur mental health is so bad but u won’t let me help u i just want to know why can i just help u like how u did.

I think you're my twin flame lol. Sucks you live in nj. We're young, but I feel something I've never felt before. Its new. idk

If you had the opportunity to get with other people, would you take it? Because I keep rejecting everyone. I don't want to give up on us even if we don't know what it is. I also don't want to look like a fool

You’re my best friend and that’s exactly why I can’t tell you how I feel. If I do I might lose you forever, and I can’t risk that

even thought i don’t like you at all anymore, the thought of you lingers in my brain 24/7 and i don’t know how to make it stop.

i’m sorry i fucked up but how could you break up with me on the day you told me you would choose me over anyone and try your best to make it work? how could you just not care anymore. i want you back, i’m sorry.

no, we're never going to see each other again so I hope you liked my tits because you're never seeing them again

You made me realise that i didnt need you to survive and that your a dickhead and even though your ok sometimes you think your better than everyone else but thanks for helping me i guess