Unsent messages to JACOB

FUCK YOU. I hate you so much. You ruined me and my perception of friendship and love. I never feel good enough for anyone anymore. Fuck you and fuck our friends. You made me think i was the bad guy. You ruined me. Are you happy?

i want to forget you but i can't, you are my oxygen. this colour is super ugly but it's an inside joke deal with is

you were my first and I didn't know what I was doing. I was manipulative and kind of horrible, and I just want to apologize. I know I can't make it up to you but I can say im sorry

hi stinky. if you're seeing this i just wanted to say that i love you so much. thank you for coming back and helping me find myself. theres been a few bumps in the road but we're good now. i think we needed some time apart to appreciate what we have. its you, and it always has been. ever since freshman year in algebra. you have to be the one.

dawg i'm not gonna lie you dropping me for her hurt and i miss how much we used to talk but ur also an annoying ass but u also make me laugh sometimes so

As much as we moved on, grew and are still friends, there won’t be a time where I wished you fought for us.

You’re the reason why I’m here living and I’m scared you are gonna leave me for someone better one day.

I’ve been waiting for something to happen, I’ve been waiting for you to call and tell me you still love me. And that is never going to come, so I write you here and feel stupid instead.

I still remember the way you crossed your eyes to make me stop crying in second grade :) hope ur doing good

I always saw those videos that said how ppl in a relationship can become strangers just like that and i never believed it until it happened to us.

That vibe I have when I’m around you.. I’ve never felt it with anyone else & that scares the shit out of me.

I loved you so much and after we dated I’ve always felt like i’m never gonna be enough or i won’t ever be able to make anyone happy. i hated you after we finally ended our relationship but i got over you & i don’t hate you as much as i used to.

When you broke up with me it split my heart in two, it wasn’t even a year. Why did it hurt so much? Why does it still hurt?

Sometimes I stay awake wondering if I made the right choice by leaving you. I thought I did before I heard your voice when I said it. It wasn't a good idea. I'm sorry, I love you.

Lamento no haberte dicho lo mucho que me gustabas, aunque ya pasaron años, sigo pensando en ti. Gracias por haberte fijado en mi cuando estaba en mi peor momento, me hiciste sentir querida y deseada, enserio lo siento por no haberme dado cuenta que estaba enamorada de ti, también me hubiera gustado que tal vez tu me hayas dicho que me querías o al menos algo parecido, ahora me quedaré por siempre con la duda de si de verdad te gustaba, a veces pienso que si, otras que no, pero de todas formas lo que pasamos aún me hace suspirar y pensar en esos momentos una y otra vez. Ojalá algún día nos veamos de nuevo, solamente para ver que tal estamos y como fueron nuestras vidas, solo quiero eso, nada más, porque te estoy olvidando de a poco y quiero seguir haciéndolo. Estoy agradecida de haberte conocido Jacob, pero ya es tiempo de aceptar que lo que podría haber sido una relación, lamentable ya no pasó.

De: Esa chica que está en proceso de olvidarte

Why did u do that? Said that u love me and that u wont stop till I fall for u, but when I did u just left with no explanation. You broke me. Fuck boys whos names start with J

I won’t ever grow the confidence to tell you how I fell, I love you even if I can’t tell you or myself that. I miss you everyday and miss our growing talks. Mahal kita.

hey. i wish we were on better terms but i guess thats okay. i hope you're doing well and are happy. i will always care for you i wish you knew that. i would never talk badly about you no matter what you would do but you still think i did. on new years eve i sent you a snap saying hey. i was going to tell you i didn't say anything about you but you never opened it. you left me on delivered for 2 days and then blocked me. ngl that hurt. im sorry i ever told you i liked you. everything was so much better before i said something. i mean atleast we were friends. now were nothing. and that hurts me more than you will ever know. i thought of you as a close friend. i told you stuff i've never told anyone and now were like strangers. actually worse than strangers. atleast strangers have a possibility of knowing each other. i don't think that will ever happen again between us. i genuinely hope you're doing well and have a great life. goodbye forever.

I’m so confused why are you texting me I love it but I’m just confused if you want us again or if your just being friendly

3 years I waited for you to be ready, then you kiss me on new years but still don't want anything, why am I not enough for you?

hey. i love you, i love you so much. but i wish you talked to me more. whenever i say i love you, you don’t respond. you leave me on opened when i try to talk about something serious. and just say “ok” when i attempt to talk to you. i’m sorry if i’ve done anything. we’ve been together for almost 7 months now but you’re acting like you don’t even know me. i hope things get better though, dummy. i love you.

after everything i just became nothing to you, you ghosted me like we never were anything. why? i did so much for you, i did everything

i wish i left once i realized you loved her. instead i just convinced myself it was all in my head. it hurts so much to see you two together.

Thank you for teaching me how to love.
You will always be in my heart, even when you broke it to the milion and more pieces.

i loved you.
i still love you.
the only difference is i love you now for who you are, not who i wanted you to be.

the bands you introduced me to used to make me miss you. now i can smile and remember my love for you.

i loved you. I loved you when you tore me to pieces. i loved you when I begged for forgiveness for mistakes you made. I loved you while you ruined my soul, but still it's so hard to let go.

getting over you is so hard and I dont even know why. you confuse me so much. i just wish you were direct with me so i could know if you were just messing with my feelings

after everything, did we really forgive each other just to be friends? there's something different about you. sending luv and chocolate glazed donuts.

our friendship has been pretty rocky, but I still love you regardless. I don't want to hurt you, but I have and I'm sorry about it. I wish I had the courage to just dm you and tell you this but I'm just too nervous to do that :(

i miss you so much i don’t know how to do anything anymore i still check my phone looking for a text from you but i need to understand that you aren’t coming back this time and i need the closure but that’s not going to happen and just thinking about it makes me feel sick i love you and i wish i showed it better when we were together. hopefully your happy now and doing better . i love you.

hey, i wanted to let you know that i’m not over you. i pretend like i am because it would seem weird if i wasn’t. we’ve talked a couple times, but the way you looked at me made me fall. everything about you was perfect, from your shy nature to your muted green eyes. when you looked at me, you looked into my soul, you smiled and looked at me then at the ground. when you laughed, always reserved, you’d look at me to see if i was laughing as well, the gaze through your eyelashes that i loved so much. i’m going to miss you and i don’t know if i’ll find anyone like you again.

i will always love you forever but if i was to much for you that means you wasn’t enough for me an your a dick for leaving me like that

I miss you. Kinda pathetic right?, You left randomly. You didnt even try telling me what i did wrong. But i get why u left. I love you.

I hate that I still think about you, but you don't. I hate that I haven't moved on, but you have. I know that I deserve better, but I don't want better. I still want you. You don't, though. You never did. I will never get back the time and parts of myself that I gave to you.

I feel like I’m over you but I’m not in a sense. I hate that I met you because I can’t find you in other people.

You treated me like another one of your addictions... no one knows who you are... not your family not even yourself! But I know... you’re the man every female is warned about. The one that doesn’t care for consent. The one that doesn’t care if their being used. You used me. Like you use your daddy’s money and your mommy for dealing with emotions bc you can’t even do that. You hide behind daddy’s white job at the courthouse but one day everyone will know the real you. Sooner or later the truth comes out.

Fuck you. I thought you were better than this. I convinced myself you were. I lost friends over defending you. Now everytime we talk you make me feel like shit.

You chose your friends over me and it still hurts. After you got tired of me you chose one of my closest friends. I hate how stupid I was.

We haven’t spoke in months but you’re still on my mind 24/7 and I hate it. I miss hearing your voice and seeing your name pop up on my phone every morning

even though you just want me for sex i would never leave you. and no matter what i never will no matter how much it hurts me.

being apart from you is the hardest thing i’ve ever experienced, but i’ve grown so much. i will always have love for you and care about you, but i’m finally accepting that our chapter is closed and i’m letting go. much love forever

we would be so good together. i have always had this feeling that we would work and that we should just be together. You never really leave my mind, I always find myself coming back to you.

I know your feelings are real, just like you know mine were. I just wish you had given me a real chance... and now it’s too late. Maybe someday down the road... things will align again

i know u just wanna be friends, and i wouldn’t want to mess that up, but i swear i fall for you more everyday and idek why... i wish you wanted more

I still look at our old messages wondering where I went wrong. I still love you stoopid. I always will.

I wish I knew how you felt about me. I can't tell if you care or not. Sometimes I think it's obvious but I can never be sure. I really like you and I hope one day you make it clear whether you like me back.

im sorry for stringing you along like some game. im at a point of confusion in my life that i don’t know how to work out. and i know i shouldn’t be trudging you along with it, but i selfishly don’t have the guts to let you go. i missed you so much last time, it pained me. but im scared. scared to commit to a new thing, something ive never experienced and going outside of my comfort zone. i wish i could tell you in a way without sounding like a selfish twat. im sorry.

i’m in love with you and it kills me that you’re with her now. you couldn’t even go a month to wait and show me that you really wanted to be with me, you just had to go and be with her. you made to promises to me, you’d never leave and you wouldn’t cheat anymore. you broke both those. we started this year being together and i’m ending it still trying to get over you and hating myself bc i cant. you’re ending it living with your new gf and being happy. how could you do what you did and love me? everyone said that you were gonna send me a last text “for closure” well, you haven’t. but i’m still waiting for some reason. go be happy with her just don’t hurt her like you hurt me.

your not gonna see this like every but i just wanted you to know that i miss you. so so much. my heart hurts knowing your not coming back and i will forever blame myself for that, you didn’t deserve to go through what you did. rest easy angel x