Hey love bug! I’m sorry for being such a bitch. Although sorry won’t cut it, I wish I could be there for you. I hope you live out a happy life and find someone to really love. x

"i know we'd be much happier together"
you left? if you know that, why would you leave me when I needed you most? my life went completely upside down and the only person I wanted to talk to was you and you wouldn't even answer a question about my math homework. i said i would've fallen for you in the airport but the fact of the matter was is that i already did by the time you told me it wouldn't work. i cried for almost two months straight. you saw me struggling with life, with heartbreak, with feeling absolutely alone, and you never once asked if i was okay. every part of me wants you to just text me and say you miss me. i want you so badly to say you messed up, that you shouldn't have left, and that you wanna make it work. but i know you'd leave again. i know id fuck things up again. id be too scared that you'd leave and id push you away. id ask a million times a day if you still cared about me and id remind you that if you wanna leave, you can. because if I'm prepared for it, unlike last time, it wont hurt as bad. i miss you. there are some nights where ill just look at our old texts and cry because i was stupid enough to care about someone i had never met before that fast. I know you've moved on. I've seen it. When I saw the picture of you and her, my stomach dropped and I felt like time had stopped. I wish you weren't so hard to get over. I wish you didn't leave my heart in such agony, such distress. Yet here I am, three months later, still trying to feel the way i felt with you, with someone else. It hasn't worked yet, in case you were wondering. i wish i could turn time backward. i wish i would've just bought a plane ticket before you ended things. I wish i didn't catch covid. I wish i wasn't so far away. I wish you would've given me a chance because every day since then I've wondered why I wasn't worth it because I would've spent every paycheck I had on coming to see you. its stupid and cliche and little by little, i am getting over it. maybe i was too damaged for you, but i hope i meet someone who will take the risk and decide that maybe, just maybe, I'm worth the flight.

so i dont know what to say other than you broke me, it took a little less than two years to realize you are not worth the tears, you hurt me more than anyone can. but the thing is i forgive you, i dont forgive you to make you feel better, but for me to move on, because if i dont i know i'll never let you go. i love you forever and always

I’ll never get over you, and I hope that one day I’ll be able to stop looking at my phone every 5minuted hoping for your text.

i have been missing you a lot recently...please just text me again. i was happy to have my friend back:(

I'm sorry I hurt you but I hope one day you'll understand I did it for your benefit and because I love you x

idk how to tell you that i like you when you live on the other side of the world, idek if you feel the same way anymore, you made me feel like you cared and that you liked me too, until you just stopped showing that

Hey, um I hope that ur doing alright. Cant wait to see you in 10 days. Hope that what I want to happen will happen. See ya then

It hurt breaking your heart. I wish I hadn’t fallen out of love. But I can no longer hear it in the silence. I’m sorry

thank you for teaching me what heartbreak felt like. i wish i never ruined our friendship. i miss you.

I just wish you understood. Please come back I miss you more than anything. I’m sorry it got ruined for us so many times. I’m sorry, I love you.

i can’t believe i trusted when you told me you would always be honest with me. you would always communicate.

I’m trying not to fall for you. I don’t think my friends approve but maybe it’s too late and maybe I love you already.

i know you’re not going to see this, but i would give everything just to go back to summer. it’s all different now. i miss the old you, i miss the old us. i feel like you’re nothing but a shadow anymore i just want to re connect i guess. i’m sorry if it’s my fault.

even when i know i’m just an afterthought, i still have hope that you might want me like you once said you did

i still think of you when i wake up and before i go to bed. i will never not love you, and sometimes i think i’ll miss you forever.

I'm sorry. I wish this could have ended differently. It's taking all of me to not call you right now and take you back. I have to let go, though. I deserve more than to be half loved. Thank you for everything.

You said yellow was a nice color. That was the last good conversation we had. The rest were fights. I miss you so much Connor, but I need to let you go. You were my yellow, I hope I was yours.

I know you don’t love me back. And I know I’ve messed up a lot, but I’d do anything for you to be happy. I miss what we had.

Even after all you’ve done my heart still wants you...I wish it didn’t but maybe in another life you’ll be my yellow

I know I have a hard time expressing myself, but I just want you to know that I care about you, more than you think. I know you know I have commitment issues, and I'm thankful you still try to work everything out with me. I'll love you forever. And that's the problem.

Hey. I just wanted to let you know I'm okay. I miss you so much. I am truly sorry for everything that happened between us. I'm sorry we drifted. I'm sorry we are not friends anymore. I am sorry we don't text or facetime anymore. I am so so so sorry. I love you. I'm like truly in live with you boy. It is so hard not seeing or talking to you every day anymore. It's hard. Like really hard. I cry so much because I just miss seeing your face and I miss your voice. I miss how you would smile when I walked into class. I miss how I would sit on the lab tables and you would go in between my legs and look into my eyes. I miss goofing off with you in class and Friday nights. I'm like in love with you and I just can't let you go. But you can't see how bad it hurts me. It kills me. I just want to see you one last time and tell you how I truly feel about you. I can't take this anymore. I'm giving up without you being here to tell me everything is okay. I miss being held in your arms. The long hugs. The talks we have had. I have known you for years. We were best friends but I fucked it up. I fucked us up. It's my fault. I unblocked you. But I just can't add you back. It is so hard to and I don't know why. It is so hard to let you go because I don't wanna let you go. I get angry when you get a gf. When I shouldn't. i am obsessed with you and everything about you. I just miss you and I want everything to go back to the way it was before anything happened.

i never want to lose you. please never stop talking me again. you will always be the one that got away

you moved on. i hope shes everything you need. i hope she reminds you that you're not too much. i miss u

You were my first love and i’ll never forget the time we had together. you destroyed me when i found out you never liked me. i wish you the best, but i hate you for giving me trust issues.

thank you for loving me despite me being a pain in the ass. you are the greatest thing i’ve ever loved. i can’t wait to see where we go from here connor riley

There's always another girl.
Why wasn't I enough for you even though I gave you everything?
What did i do wrong?
Why can't you give me a reason?
I just want a reason.
Why'd you lie? Especially when you knew what it would do to me.
It makes me sick every day.
YOU CHEATED BUT I'M THE ONE BEGGING YOU TO STAY.
WHY.
WHERE'S MY REASON.
JUST GIVE ME A FUCKING REASON.
I CAN'T FUCKING DO THIS ANYMORE.
But I can't stand the thought of you loving someone else the way you used to love me.
I know it's selfish but I'm tired of getting hurt.
It always ends the same for me.
Hurt.
Over and over and over and over again.
How do I make it stop?
I can't take this.
Why can't I just stay happy.
Why can't I just be loved.
I say I'm sorry even though I did nothing wrong.
But still, I'm sorry
..
Goodbye...

You broke me. You broke me and I can't even see your face without panicking. Why did you have to fuck with my whole life? I really thought I loved you.

I will never ever forget you. Thank you for being my best friend and my twin flame. I’m sorry it ended the way that it did.

I don’t respect you. I just see you as a joke, a little spineless bitch to play around with while I’m with my friends. Sucks you didn’t answer so I couldn’t laugh in your face and tell you how much of a pussy you are. Nobody takes you seriously. You are my biggest regret to this day. I know a lot more than you think I do.

You are the type of person that people's mothers warn them not to get affiliated with. They are right.

We both know we had something. Why didn't we just go for it? You know how I felt. I thought I knew how you felt, too.

i wish i could tell you how special i think you are. maybe one day you’ll feel the same. you bring so much light to the world.

I have been in love with you for years. Time goes by and I realized how much I messed up. I never meant to hurt you. I never meant to make you feel bad. I’m sorry, I get jealous whenever you talk about someone new..I brush it off and I miss you..

i miss you before you hurt me. i cant help but look back at us then and cry. you know I'm better without you, and i know you're nothing without me.

I don't know how to feel about our relationship or how it went. All I know right now is that I feel like the world has intentionally brought us apart and together so many times it's dizzying. I hope that you learn respect.

i picked black because ur wanna-be eboy ass wore it 24/7. but it was ur birthday a few days ago and i was too scared to text u so i guess ill just do this. even though u will never see this, happy late birthday c

You're on my mind constantly. I don't know how you actually feel about me, and it hurts me. I know you could do much better, but I just wish you would love me like I love you. I wish I never met you.

I hate the fact that I can’t stop thinking about you and it’s not even the real you just what’s in my head

you make me happy without ever realizing, you make me feel special and loved like I have never before.

During the start of our relationship I thought of breaking up with you so many times. I don't know why i never actually went through with it but I'm glad i didn't. I've been with you for over a year now and i hope it continues on for more. I love you.

im sorry if this message is jumbled up or a bit squashed together. i just wanted to express how ive been feeling since we last spoke.
i finally think i am over you. i have spent four years trying to get over something that was never even an actual relationship.
you have probably scarred me from any type of relationship for the rest of my life without even knowing.
youre still living happily, talking to girls and getting into new relationships and friendships without even thinking about me.
you have made me put up a huge fucking wall around myself that i dont let anyone break down.
all my trust issues stem from you.
i couldnt even talk to another boy without you poisoning my mind and making me feel GUILT. what tf did i have to be guilty for?
youre the biggest manipulator i have ever met; your solution to stop me from s'lf h'rm'ng was by threatening that you would do it too if you found out i had!! what kind of sick minded person does that to somebody? you would say that you would k'll yours'lf if i ever committed su'c'de myself or if i ever left you, thats fucked up. when i finally grew some balls and told you i couldnt be friends with you anymore cause youre toxic, you said you would k'll yours'lf and that i couldnt leave.
i hope you know the huge impact youve left on my life that will stay with me forever but i am now ready to let other people in.
i feel happier that ive finally let you go and i hope you live a happy life, even though you caused pain in mine for four long years.
goodbye, connor.

I still feel confused some nights about how I feel, if how we started and ended was the right way to go?

hey. I don't know if you still think about me but I still think about u. I don't understand what I did wrong. I thought u liked me back but I guess u didn't. I know u don't want anything to do with me but I can't move on. please lets try to work this out

You’ve made life very difficult for me. Although I’ve known you for the time I have, you always have to impact what I do without having to do anything, I’m taking that power back and leaving you behind.

Sometimes I like to think it was just the end of the chapter and not the story but deep down I know that it was our end. I miss you bub

hey, i wonder how flower vase, gus and ellie are. i miss you. you promised me you were committed. but ig you found someone better

i dont think you understand that i want you back. i know its been a long time but i cant stand seeing u w/o running up and kissing u:/

why’d you leave and never come back when you promised you would and this wasn’t forever.
i love u connor.

I truly believe you were my person, but I guess I just wasn’t yours. It’s so hard letting go of someone you thought would be in your life forever and who you loved more than anything. Be safe, I will love you forever, but it’s time for me to let go.