Unsent messages to JUSTIN

i’m so sorry. i feel terrible about what i said. i miss what we used to have before you hated me. i’m so so sorry. i know it’s been years. i wish it wasn’t too late for us.

my twin flame. my favourite soul tie. my heart only yearns for your love. even if you don’t love me back.

idk why you left me, i still think ab you all the time... but i don't really mis you ig. still wish you the best tho, even after what you did to me...

I miss the old you. The 13 year old you that I got ice cream and listened to music with. I barely recognize you all these years later

you're manipulative, and you constantly yell at me for being myself until i broke down and cried. you are a sadist, masochist, and a fcking sociopath. i've known you for forever. prob why i never left or why i stayed while you ruined my mentality. even though u put me through so much shit I'm still here.

as much laughs, fun times and good moments we had, ur toxicity and negative energy was too much. as we grew older, u made me feel like shit all the time and u just were never satisfied with anything i did. im so grateful ur out of my life now, i wish u nothing but the best in future. hopefully one day we can catch up and enjoy life like we did before.

loving you feels like being stabbed each time i stay. but i shall never get angry with the knife. i'll sigh ,and pull it out calmly. ready for it to happen again.

out of all 273,000 words in the dictionary no combination can even begin to explain how you made me feel i’m so in love with you and i hope one day you realise that.

how come you moved on so fast when im still stuck on you. I feel used by you and was always the
second choice.

Whatsa dude. You don't know how much I liked you or how much I hated the fact that you lied to me so many times. I'm glad you are gone and I can move on and work on myself... Although I'll never be able to forget you.

I don’t like sending pictures but I know it’s the only way you will ever still want me and it sucks because I know I’ll continue to do it I love you so much why don’t you want me anymore

you're just another stupid boy and ill get over you like i always do but i just wish you would appreciate me. im too good for you anyways

hi, i'm going to let myself go through it for a min. the truth is that when we first met, i felt something that i have never felt before. the min we started talking, i just felt so at peace. it's not the looks that i fell for, it's the way u carried yourself through the morals & values u had going on for yourself that made me fell in love with u. it's crazy to see that just for a second, everything just made sense. ik we were never together but every single time i got a chance to talk to u or even have u around just made me feel worth it. every moment with u was worth it. the fact that i cared so much about u scared me & to be completely honest with u, i often distance myself from u because i didn't know if u felt the same way as me & it was just so hard for me to tell u how i really felt. then there was that day where i knew i completely lost u. from our conversations being shorter to u no longer wanting anything to do with me. yes u said u appreciated me but u no longer valued me and it honestly fucking sucks. i know u said u needed time to figure some things out & for me to give u that space & the time apart, i never failed to check up on u because u were the only one that crossed my mind & i just wanted to be there for u. i hate this. i hate how we just drifted apart. slowing losing someone u really cared about but i want to say i'm sorry for pushing u too hard. i'm sorry for trying to bring out your vulnerable side because u have never dealt with it before. losing u has got to be so hard but i'm ok. things aren't going to change or go back to the way it was anymore, as much as it breaks me.. a part of me would always love u for the right & wrong reasons. as much as i don't say it, i appreciate every single piece of effort u put into me and it never went unnoticed. it's hard to lose somebody u love but i cannot keep losing myself trying to understand what was already in front of me. i wish u nothing but the best & to the next girl who walks into your life, i hope she understands u & loves u as much as i did because i lost that chance to do so & she has it now. pls be gentle with u because your guard continues to stay up and be patient with him. pls take care of him. without further notice, i'm letting this go. i loved u. i truly did.

i want you to be happy even if that means i’m no longer in your life. i love you, and be safe please.

i want you to be happy even if that means i’m not longer in your life. i love you, and be safe please.

I never felt uncomfortable to talk to you. Every time i talked to you it made me happier. I would wake up happy and go to sleep happy knowing you were in my life.

My heart skips a beat every time I re-read our old messages. Can we just rewind and start all over again?

u felt like a movie, u were the only guy who truly cared for me and i even know that u brought so much happiness and we were so good i wish u didn’t leave i will still always remember u in another demention i know we’re taller

i hope we can end up like the stories of two lost lovers meeting each other again and everything falling back into place.

even though you don’t love me i’ve never felt that way about anyone and i don’t think i will ever feel that way again

you still show up in my dreams sometimes. i hope you're doing okay. and if you're not, that you still have a home in me.

i'm sorry i come off mean and cold. even i don't understand why i say the things i say to you but i don't think you understand that i care for you more than i've cared about most people and if you ever needed anything i would be there in a heartbeat without hesitation every time. the way i care about you, it's not even in a romantic way. you're just one of my favorite people i've ever met. and i think that's why i'm cruel. because i think i'm scared of caring about anyone that much because it's never been reciprocated and i'd rather push you away than let you in and lose you...

you were meant to be a light, but all you did was bring darkness back into my life. I was in pain, and you made that worse. But thank you for letting me be myself for the first time around a boy. You will never get that from someone again.

It was your graduation today. I messaged you privately for the first time in months to congratulate you. I wanted to say more than that, but I know better, that I’ll hurt my feelings all over again.

i looked at you like you were the sun to my moon , i began to worship you . i began to put you before me . no ones happiness mattered more to me then yours . but you didn’t even give me half ... i thought that when you posted my nudes i’d finally be over you . i’d finally hate you , like i should . but i didn’t ... i pitied you . most of all i pitied me because i still loved you. loving you drove me insane ... loving you made me hate myself . after you left i crawled into a deep hole . a dark one . i am just now two years later getting out of it . i forgive you for everything but most of all i still love you.

You took a part of me that i wasn’t willing to give up so soon , now you make me feel like a guilty person...

I wish you let me in more. I wish I was enough for you to text me back. I hope you’re happy. I really do.

say something please, i miss you. i keep having dreams about you like the universe is trying to tell me something.

I just want my best friend back, from falling asleep on face time, too biking random places at 5 am, and dancing and singing in the rain. I want those adventures with you. The one person I could tell anything with no shame is gone. I'll always look for you in every person I meet. I hope you're happy even if it's not with me

I tend to come on here whenever I am sad and thinking about you. I cant believe it’s been over a year since we last talked (as more than strangers). It’s so hard having to watch you from a distance. I always wish you the best and I hope you achieve your dreams. Love you kiddo :)

when we hung out my cheeks hurt so bad afterwards from smiling so much. I'm sorry I'm too much, i just get attached to people so fast and you felt so safe. i wish you would reach out but i understand. i just miss you man, i miss being able to be so comfortable around someone. i wish you'd say sorry, i wish i could know if you actually forgave me or if it was just to play me, i wish i knew why i can't let go. maybe one day life will bring us back together again like it did once before.

i wonder if you ever think about me the way i think about you. i wonder if we could ever be anything...

im sorry i left you for someone else. he ended up tearing me apart. i feel selfish for only realizing how great you were when it was convenient to me.

i'm sorry i hurt you my freshman year of college - it was wrong of me. i'm just grateful you made me a better person afterwards.

thanks for being a lover and friend. but thats only sugarcoating it, sure you were nice, but you were toxic and you broke me completely.

We went from talking daily to not talking at all. I don’t know what hurts more, letting you go or knowing you probably never felt the same way. I just hope you’re doing ok now...

I guess I loved the way you made me feel. I loved the way your touch gave me butterflies. it was never meant to be.

Honestly, there hasn't been a single day that you haven't crossed my mind. I want to talk to you so badly and every other night I think of how much I want you to hold me. I think the reason I haven't been able to call you again is because I'm terrified that I'll hear your voice and be able to tell that all your feelings and warmth toward me are gone.

you did really hurt and play me. but i honestly thought that i missed you around 2 months ago. you gave me the attention that i needed. but now I finallyyyyy got over you and finally left every memory we had together. I found someone new who can finally talk to me and treat me right. but thank you anyways for trying but you really just brought me down a little bit.

I'm not going anywhere. Relax. Keep growing as a person & letting me love every version I get. Thanks for the journy so far, cannot wait for more memories to come❤️

it's so hard for me. i'm so sad without you. i know you're not yourself right now but i will wait for you. you were my safe spot. the one i adored. i'm so sorry. even with the people you're surrounded by that could help you, the thought of feeling alone still eats you up and i'm so sorry. my heart aches. i'm aching for the one person i would put first before anybody else. i love you. i love you. i hope your pain eases and we will cross paths to find each other again. you were my happiness. i miss you more than anything.

finally letting you go. i don’t hate you but i honestly just never want to talk to you or see you again. good luck with everything and have a nice life

I really really like you. You are going to a new school next year, so this year is really my last opputunity.

we were best friends who fell in love with each other, but we never told one another until you went back to your toxic ex. now i am left alone wondering what i've done wrong.i lost my best friend.

I avoided you because I’m scared of vulnerability. But I’m afraid rejecting you was the biggest mistake of my life.

Hi. It's me again. I don't really know what to say to you but I have finally moved on and it's time to actually let you go now. As much as I love you, you are not my person. I want to thank you for teaching me to love myself after you couldn't. As much as it hurts to look back and see how many tears I have shed for YOU because YOU didn't try hard enough to stop those tears from falling down my cheek, I still have so much love for you. I hate the way I don't hate you. I hate the way I still miss you and your cuddles and the way you say my name. I hate the way after something good happens, you're the only person I wanna tell. You broke me to the point where I had to distract myself from ever thinking about you. I see all the memories from a year ago from when I first developed genuine feelings for the boy who would turn into my first love. It hurts but what doesn't hurt is how I can finally stop crying over something that wasn't worth my tears. I will always love you. Thank you. I'm one lucky girl...

i know youll never see this but I love you so much more than I've ever loved anyone and I hate that bc I don't know how to cope with that. I also hate being completely in love with you because I know you'll never love me back the way I do

u weren’t even my first love. i wanted u to be. I’m still head over heals for u and u just won’t ever see me like that. I know I’m nothing you’d want and I’m not your type of girl. but really, I have such a good heart and I wanna give it too u so bad.

Yes, people may think I stole you from her when in reality you stole her from me. I always liked you, even though I wasn't as pretty back then, I'd like to think you'd find me pretty now. I know things wouldn't have worked out, but sometimes in the back of my mind, I wish that they did.

have you really moved on? i told you i have but i havent & i wish we were still together:(. (p.s i miss you "bsby")