Unsent messages to JOE

you told me we wouldn’t work because of the distance but somehow no matter how far away you are you make me feel things that no one else ever has. i love you.

If one of us decided to make the first move we would definitely be something right now. But instead you fell back to her and i feel used and empty.

I feel closer and more attatched to you every time we talk, but i also get more scared. how do i lose feelings for you?

your mom told me that anytime you bring a new girl into the house, she is gonna have a hard time reaching her standards because of me

I didn’t know hearing what you said to other girls could hurt so much . I still loved and love you though , I really thought I was the only one you liked.

I still think of when we first met the telling our friends about each other and the love for us . I miss you

Thank you, for everything. I might not be able to have you right now, but i’ll keep fighting for you.

we never spoke, we had different friendship groups and we never crossed paths, we had mutual friends who you had lessons with however we never became friends until recently and now after being friends for a while i don't think i could ever tell you how i feel. i've been told to stay away from you from all of my friends because well.. people have said things. but idc things happen, the past is the past. when i talk to you i feel like i'm breathing fresh air, like you saved me from drowning and i can't thank you enough. i felt so bad about myself before we became friends and now you've made me feel better about myself and honestly i feel so much happier.
you did something which caused me to lose trust in you. and then when i asked you abt it you lied. you lied to me. i let it go but i always feel like that memory is engraved in the back of my mind. but i can't stop being friends with you. you mean to much to me. honestly, i don't mind you big dummy.. i rlly like you and i don't think i will ever overcome my fear to tell you.
thank you for everything joe. thank you from being my friend and allowing me to talk and have no fear of judgment.

Your such a bad person but that doesn’t stop me from loving you. Your one of the only people who actually gives me happiness and it sucks I hate you but I love you

why did you decide that i was the one to blame, when deep down you knew it was you? i guess you just didn’t want to admit you were the issue.

Kinda miss u, kinda don’t. My heart still drops when I see your name pop onto my phone, I just wish shit could of been different for us❤️

i used to like you but then you changed you became a jerk like you were before and i didnt see it until i came to my realization (:

You hurt me without thinking twice. But when I think about hurting you, I can’t do it.That’s the difference between us.

we were best friends in primary. what happened? u used to have fun and talk to me, and now, u dont even look at me, when im always looking over to you, watching u laugh with ur girlfriend. i think im in love with u and i hate myself for it. you've made me look for u in a crowd of a thousand when u wouldnt even look at me if i was standing right in front of u.

As I scroll through countless memories, I remind myself of a dead past long gone. When you cared about my broken song

Blue-the color of your stupid lunchbox I wore on my head with pride. Blue-How I felt when you said you liked her. Even when I loved you I tried to get you with her for your happiness. Because I never want you to feel blue. Blue-my favorite color forever and always. All because of you

i’m sorry we fell out of love and for how i treated you, but you will always be my soul mate & i’ll always look back on when we were together as the good old days. you’ll always be my peaches x

hey man i just snapped you again even though you left me on delivered its kinda fun having the adrenal rush through me and i just wanted to say that i really hope that you see these that i write for you just to help you they are all in this color and are addressed to "joe" but yeah please just talk to me love ya
love ashley

hey joe its me again i just wanted to let you know that i know you dont like me and thats whatever i have kinda accepted it yk but i had a really bad today and yesterday and you leaving me on delivered really hurts i dont expect you to understand what its like but it really hurts i seriously j want to talk to you like please man just talk to me it felt like we were getting closer but then you completely pulled away it really hurts i will probably end up talking to you so we dont just stay in this place but you will probably j ignore what i said idek y you do that its really annoying i dont even know why i have feelings for you you listen to jucie world like man come on ttyl love ya

im starting to question if im lesbian. i know im not straight, but im stating to think im lesbian. wanna know why i havent labeled myself as lesbian yet? i love you, and youre male. thats why

Thanks for helping me, and thank you for hurting me. This way I didn’t stick with you for poison that I craved. It’s been 2 months since I got over those hurt feelings. Thank you not for the help, but for the chance of realization I was given from this...

Fuck you. if you disliked me so much and thought i was too young, why did you try so desperatley to talk to me? whyd you ask me for nudes? whyd you respond to all my texts so fast? whyd you contact me after we had a bg fight? what the hell is wrong with you fucking idiot? I still love you.

I miss you so much. I wanna be with you, i wanna talk to you, i just want you to remember i exist. I'll never forget you dude. i wish i could but i just cant.

I know we’re just friends now. But I’m still in love with you. I know your going through a hard time, but your gonna get through it, I promise you that. No matter what I’ll always stick around because you was the first one I truly ever loved & I'm sorry I’m not what you wanted or needed. It breaks my heart im not yours anymore. Please come back. :(

I know the things you did. You are not as innocent as you present yourself and I fear for those after me.

URGHHH. I just don't understand. I just wanna know what u think of me, how do u feel abt me. I need to know pls. I need to my heart to rest.

I like u a lot and i know u don’t like me back, and i know u know i like u. Just wanted to say that i’m still waiting for you to make a move.

you hurt me but I still find myself wanting you so I'm going to have to force this idea of you out my head

i waited 9 months for you to come back, and now that you have im not sure it’ll ever work out. i’m scared that i’ve just caused myself more pain. maybe it would’ve been better if you had never come back.

u were my first love and truthfully i don't think i'll stop loving you. and im okay with that bc u deserve it

I hated the way you made me feel. The way you I would get nervous yet so happy with your presence and talking to you...but then you messed it up. now when I look at you I think of all the mistakes we both made and wish it worked out for the best. If only we were a right person wrong time situation..

i love everything abt u. I love ur eye bags, ur laugh, the way u look at me even when someone else is speaking. i love that even though u think astrology is bs, u'll listen to everything i have to say abt it and still be interested.

i’ve loved you for a while now , you don’t know it though , i sit next to you in maths and stare at your gorgeous eyes and adorable dimples , i hope one days you’ll see me the same way i see you ?

you were the first time i fell head over heels and now you found her, take care of yourself and don't ever let her take you for granted

Ugh! I’m so goddamn in love with it actually makes me feel sick, but you know with butterflies moral of the story unrequited love is a cruel bitch :)

everything just felt so right with you, almost effortless. i miss you, i wish it had worked out differently for us.

also i forgot to add that i had a dream that we almost had a three way with this other red head i wish that did happen and it wasnt just in my dreams lol idek why i remembered that dream i never remember them it must have some significance
love ashley

I don’t know why but the universe needs me to tell you that you need to check on her. give her a hug and ask if she’s ok. I promise she isn’t and all she wants is for someone to ask

I kept typing and deleting my message until I realised I will never be able to fully say what I mean to you

I would give the world to have you back in my arms and to be able to tell you how much I love you still

I wish you could realize the love that I gave you was true and that I wasn’t like any of the other girls

i know you might not feel the same but being in love with you has been the best experience of my life.

i can’t like you. i’m not allowed to like you but i kinda do. but we can’t. my life and friendships
will be over.

hey joe its me again i did remove the sparkle from your name but i had a dream about you. The dream was kinds scary it was an audrey dream... i really just wish that we can at least be friends yk. idk what i can do to makes things work but if you are going to put any effort then that will be the end; i dont need you. but i really wish you had/ have an actual chance to rail me. i am just really confused like you texted me first and started to snap me first but i feel like you truly couldnt give less fucks ab me and i hurts it really does. it sucks because i feel like i can tell the kind of person you are and would really wish to be friends and more but you dont give the effort so its not going to happen. love you xo babe

I thought you could be the one but it’s been over 100 days and your still not ready for a relationship after leading me on for all those days idk if I can do it anymore.

It’s been a year and my heart still hurts the same as it did the night I threw the necklace on the floor. I still love you Joe but I wish I didn’t. God I wish I didn’t. Keeping you blocked is the only shot I have at letting us go. I’m glad you’ve found someone who makes you happy. I’m sorry we didn’t work, I wish we would’ve been better for each other. I know you aren’t the one for me, I just wish you were.

thank you for showing me what love isnt. Thank you teaching me that i need to know my worth. Im with the guy of my dreams now thank you for showing me what a man should not treat me like.

Thank you for being kind to me and for giving me strength. You’ve moved on but I still wish you well.

i wish you could see the pain in my eyes the way that i see the pain in your eyes. i love u but im hurting rn.

i was so happy when you wanted me back. but i had to push you away so you could feel what i did when you left