Unsent messages to JACKSON

thank you for the laughs, the memories, the nights singing bruno mars. who said losing love hurts more then a friendship. you once were the person who said you could tell me anything, and now we're just strangers.

Jackson, you were the first one who wanted me for me. Not my body or anything other than my personality. You wanted me to be myself. You were the one who showed me what love felt like. I think I loved you but I don't know for sure. I regret not sending that text to you a day before, a week before, hell even a month before. I'm sorry I did that to you, I'm sorry I gave up on you. On us. I missed my chance on what may have been the best thing that has happened in my life. I did everything to get me and you off my mind. Didn't work, I even made a playlist for you. You're my best friend. I know we've drifted but you are the one person I can trust who I know will listen to me. You're happy now, with her. And I'm happy for you. I may be jealous sometimes, jealous of her for getting to have you all to herself but my life is fulfilled knowing you're happy. I still listen to our song and smile every time. I still dream about you. I still think about you Jackson and I don't know if it's gonna last forever. I want you, but I don't want to ake you from anyone. I just want to apologize for getting scared, for commitment issues coming between us. I'm sorry for not texting you. I'm sorry for letting you go, but you're happy. And that makes me happy. Goodbye Jackson, I'm going to miss you with everything in my heart. Thank you, thank you for everything.

i can never stop thinking about you and i want to text you so bad and tell you how i feel but i know you don’t feel the same.i hope one day you’ll see me the way you see you.

i like you a lot but i can never tell you that because i know you don’t feel the same way and that hurts. i see you every day at school and hope you’ll see me the way i see you but you never do but i hope one that you can.

you helped build me back together by loving me and then later betrayed and left be more broke then before

i know we only know each other through the internet but you’ve became so important to me and i wish i could tell you how much you really mean to me.

hey i know we haven't talked in a while but i hope you're doing okay and that one day we will meet again at the right time!

i’m sorry. i have to learn to love myself before i can love anyone else and i hope you understand that.

When you came to my game i knew at that point you were the one. But here we are, you have a new girl. It hurt at first, but i'm happy you found someone who makes you happier than i ever did. -Your forever best friend. I love you

You were my first love. I'm sorry we didn't work out, but i'm not sorry for not being enough for you. I needed someone who loved me for ME. I will always have this weird love for you since you were the first, but you moved on. So i should too. I miss staring into your eyes and listening to frank ocean together, but its time to let go.
-Your forever best friend. I love you

I haven't seen you in a year but i still remember the last time i saw you at that foot ballgame. i still remember the shirt you were wearing. what you said as you best friend scored a goal, your smile as she walked by, the smell of your cologne as i walked by and passed you for split second, i miss you, you destroyed me, you drained my psychically and emotionally. i thought you were really gonna be the one i ended up with but things change i guess. Even after all you've done to me if you would turn you head back at me in the slightest angle i would find myself falling again. I miss you.
love, t

hi j this is obviously hk i just wanted to check up on you. i hope you´re doing well. call me when you get this.

It’s the way you shut me out while I tried to reach through those doors you locked. It’s how you left me with no explanation that hurts so much. And it’s the fact that I feel it was me who did something, but I know it’s. You did this and My mind refused to accept that. Why? I don’t know. A part of me hates you and thats the shit part. Best friends for 4years and you tossed it away without a goodbye or reason told.

when you left me i learned how to survive on my own. which i so desperately needed. when you left i learned how to make myself happy. i learned how to wake up and be generally okay with the life i was living. i learned who i was. i’m the life of the party. i’m an extrovert who loves all types of people. i learned how to love and how not to. i learned that i don’t need anybody to sing me to sleep or distract me when i’m sad. i learned how to cope with the harsh realities of life. and for that i’m forever thankful.

We were nothing. But we were everything. You were all the colors in the rainbow and all the beautiful places in the world. You never think of me as more than a friend, but I think about the way I smile when I see your name and get distracted when I see your face. I will forever hope that somewhere we will fall together but I know we are only meant to fall apart. It’s okay though. I love you.

It took you only 4 days to give up on me. And here I am after having a crush on you since summer school last year, still thinking of you 9 months after we kissed. Pathetic! Please give me some kind of explanation. What you did really hurts.

hey, jackson. i know life is hard. i wish i could be there for you. it was hard seeing you fall in love with emma while i was in love with you. i wish i had just a chance. i’ve loved you for two years now and my heart still aches at the sound of your name. i feel like we’ve drifted a lot but i guess it’s whatever.. i wish you knew that i would do just about anything for you. sometimes i stare at my ceiling and think about our memories. it hurts so much but i hope you’re happy even if it’s not with me. even just being in your presence is enough. i wish you knew. i’m too scared to tell you. i tried bringing up homecoming because i want to go so bad with you but you asked me how to ask emma. and it hurt.. a lot. i tried to laugh it off but it’s too strong. i love you. maybe i’ll be yours in another life.

i know there are better things out there for me but I can't seem to let u go. my heart skips a beat when u call.

ik your dating lily now, but i wish you weren’t. even though i might have said not now that didn’t mean not ever. it hurts a lot.

I never thought I would love you because you were my best friend and you never thought of me that way, then one day you saw her and never looked back to see me becoming just memories in the back of your head.

I still think about you and what we would be like after 6 years together... if I hadn’t been so stupid I would know. I’m sorry.

why did you leave me? what happened? im so confused and i just want to talk to you. please come back i miss you. :()

Despite the fact that you live 6000km away from me, I’m sure you are my soulmate. I hope we talk again soon. Te extraño

Despite you live 6000km away from me, I’m sure you are my soulmate. I hope we talk again soon. Te extraño

Despite you live 6000km away from me, I’m sure you are my soulmate. I hope we talk again soon. Te extraño

Ugh I can't believe I keep catching feelings for you, it's been years, and you're just playing me, but you make me feel warm

You deserve the world, I honestly don’t know how I got so lucky to even meet you. You’re special and deserve only the best, don’t let anyone ever give you any less.

jack i fall for you everyday more and more. when i look into your blue ocean eyes i fall for you. when you smile with that perfect smile i fall for you. but when you hold me you make me feel safe. last night when you didn’t wanna play soccer, i came over to you and was like “let’s go” and you took your hand and put it on my back. you held on and for some reason, that made me feel so safe. i’ve loved you since 6th grade jack. you never realized until now. so i’m sorry that i’m not ready for a relationship rn but i’m too scared to lose you. i love you too much to lose you. you promised me that no matter how far we drift you’ll make sure that we’re make it back. your exact words were “i’m never going anywhere without you”. i hope your promise stays until i’m ready

I don't think I was in love with you, but when I think of love its your face that pops up in my head.

i know that your my best friend but i’ve loved you for so long it hurts. i wish i could tell you but if i did, what would happen?

You were the first person I really let my guard down for but as soon as things got too good, you abandoned me.

i hope someday we can actually be together. i don’t know if you realize how much i like you. i hope you feel the same

God.. I am in love with you. I wish I never left the first time. But now that I have you back.. I will never leave again.. I love you jackson

not a single day goes by that i don’t think about you. even though we ended it 7 months ago, I remember each memory like it was yesterday. i would’ve done anything for you, but you never did anything for me. hope ur doing well

you broke me and i still miss you everyday. i still pray to God about you every night and i know your not missing me..

i love you. not romantically, but platonically, or wherever the place in the middle of the two is. i would do anything for you. i want to know everything about you. i want you to trust me and want to be around me. i want so much more than what we have. i know you probably don’t want that, and it’s okay. i just hope one day i’ll tell you how i feel.

I just don't know why I have never been good enough for you or for us to be together. I wish I could change that.

you broke me. high school was hell because of you but a piece of me will always love you. and i just don’t know why.

Your never gonna see this but I’m gonna write it anyway. You were my first love. Maybe just my first attachment idk. I left you because I saw you weren’t happy and I hated to see you like that. I knew you couldn’t get better if I was in your life. I let you go to grow yourself in hopes that we could reconnect in the future. You got with a new girl 4 days later. I’m over it now but I’m ngl that hurt me a lot. The things you said to me were things I never thought I’d ever hear you say. And you let me apologize for being hurt by those things. You were manipulative and cold and just needed someone to fill the void inside you that you didn’t want to fill yourself. I genuinely have no hate or anger towards you anymore. I’m completely indifferent about the situation. I wish you the absolute best in life and I hope you can fix your issues and grow yourself. You just don’t deserve a place in my life anymore. Your always have a place in my heart though. Goodbye Jackson.

I really like you and i see us working out in the future (: I hope you feel the same. Even already I feel like i can be myself around you. ?

Jackson it hurt that you never reciprocated the feelings, but at least I know I made you laugh at some point in your life.

you were worth everything. maybe one day when we are older, we will finally get it right. i love you.

i regret everything that i did with you, yet i wouldn’t change anything because of how much i miss you. but also fuck you.

i thought you were different, i though this one would work out. but instead you turn on me, i fell for you smile, your laugh and the way your face lit up when i just started giggling. i miss talking to you so much, this is my fault for messing things up. none of this is your fault and i hope you don't feel bad at all, i want to tell you so many things. i want to tell you i miss you. but deep down i know i'm doing the right thing, no matter what i did. you never changed and that will always be something i will think about. i hope this world shows you nothing but the beauty of it because that's what you deserve. you may have not treated me the way i wanted, or at least given me a little sense of respect. but i guess this is where we leave all those conversations. i miss you, but this is where it ends for us. so long jackson

Im sorry I messed it up - I was just insecure and overwhelmed. Id do anything to go back to those days

I wish I would've listened to everyone. I should've listened to you when you said people never change. I hate you so much but I miss you.

you finally made me feel alive. I was so happy. why'd you have to leave. I told you everyone that comes in my life leaves and you told me you never would. you lier

I trusted you so much. I wasted a whole two months on you to be thrown away so quickly in one night. I told you I was fine but I wasn't at all. I cried 4 days straight and even to Gianna. you know I never cry. you made me feel horrible. I want to forgive you so bad but I can't.

I really thought you were gonna be different and the universe told me you would be good for me. and I fucking miss you so much and I know you don't miss me. I don't understand how you could throw us away so quickly.

I wasnt ready for you. my brothers hated you and they knew that you would hurt me. i wish i listened.