Unsent messages to ELIJAH

im now over you.. im so proud of myself thank you for letting me find myself. its not us against the world its me against the world and you :)) ur nasty for fucking that girl btw cheaters arent cute.

To be honest you were the first person I actually loved. And it's hard seeing you from time to time because we are ex´s and it's lowkey kinda weird but it's cool because we don´t talk which is good because I feel like that would be really weird. I just don´t have your snap or anything anymore so idk how you are supposed to read this but it's cool. Now that we aren't close anymore and don´t talk I think it was for the better because we used to be super goofy and we dated for two years!! That's crazy. you were my longest relationship which is kinda cool even tho we were like 10. But I think I was a lot happier with you which is good. I'm not doing the best rn. I found someone who I really like but I don´t think they like me? Which is okay because I'm used to it. LOL. But I hope you are doing well and everything :). I miss talking to you but it was lowkey for the best. MK

I like you so much, it's hard to just stop liking you. I'm so confused too because I have no clue how you feel about me.

I always thought “turning page” was what I felt like around you , now that I think about it does have a sad ring doesn’t it?

Hiiii, you were there for me during such a hard time so thank you for everything. I still love you and always will.

9 years to finally tell you how I feel about you. And it took you 15 minutes to tell me to forget about you.

Addressed to Andrea but to Elijah hui from Bridie scarce. You were my first boyfriend and I was still a teenager, never thought my 1st relationship was gonna be THAT hard and that toxic. You had demons to fight and I was too young to deal with that..

watching you be taken to jail for what you did to me will hurt worse than what you did. but not as much as knowing i still love you.
15/3 my first

You broke my perception of love at the age of 15. I can’t forgive you for that. you broke me before i was finished being built. you were my first i would of done anything by you i still will

i wish that you would truly understand how i feel. i try to talk to you but you just say that i am fine. like yeah lol i am fine actually thank you SO MUCH for that lol. i’m trying not to kms here because i am slowly losing you to her and i can’t have and or let that happen because at this point you are all i have left after losing him and you are the only thingy keeping me here today. yet i just do not have enough of the energy that i need to keep our friendship going. i am trying my best but i just want you to understand. i love you. i just want things to go back to how they used to be. when you were nice r to me and actually cared about me. i love you.

it’s been awhile now and i still miss you, i don’t think i’ll ever stop loving you. you were the absolute world to me you made me the happiest i ever felt, i hope i made you happy too. if i could go back i would and i would have realized how much of a shitty friend i became but i hope you can forgive me bc we were so young and i was so dumb. maybe one day we’ll be friends again but until then i love you brown like coffee haha
xoxo Bridie bunny A

im so sorry. i think it’s been about five months since you left me and i havent wanted to talk about you or even think about you until now. i’m terrible right now. they say it gets worse until it gets better and i hope that’s true. i have a lot of dreams about us sometimes. it’s always the same; you tell me you still love me and hug me, we hang out and laugh, then i wake up. i wake up and sometimes i don’t let it get to me, but other times i cant help it. i wish you wouldve stayed longer and given me a chance. i miss you, but at the same time i have so much hatred for you because you liked another girl while you were with me. everyday, you told me you loved me while you went to sleep dreaming about her. it crushes me and at times i just wanna hurt you, but i know i did the last few months we were together. i wish you would come back so i could apologize and fix things, but the truth is im not a part of your life or mind anymore. im practically nonexistent to you and i guess that’s something i’ll have to accept. if you see this, which you most likely won’t, please just come back.

i want to see you happy again and the only way for that to happen is if you get back together with her.she makes you happy. you said you loved her and thought she was the one. youll forever choose her. so now i am just silently watching in the background trying to help you get her back while breaking my heart a little every time. i just want you to be happy again.

been looking through our texts for about 2 hours. it hurts so much. seeing texts saying id crumble without you. saying that id be dead before i hurt you. not sure what hurts more, seeing me hitting 3 week milestones multiple times or you saying you love me and that i was perfect, and that we were healthy. saying there was zero toxicity and that we were perfect. i miss that phase. i love you. thank you for those memories love. i am sorry for what we did. we shouldn’t smoke together again that was so horrible i am so afraid someone is going to find out. i love you dear.

this is my second one to you but only because i wanted to make it clear how much you mean to me and how much i never want to lose that but like things happen and i mean if you don’t want to be in my life then that’s fine anyways i’ll leave you for now❤️?

hi... if you’re reading this i miss you very much and you’re only 11 minutes away??‍♀️i know it’s nothing i did but i still hurt sometimes ya know and i want to be there to help you through whatever it is?

Thank you for making me feel more loveable, and special. I wish those moments could’ve lasted longer, and I could’ve helped you when you were struggling. I wonder if you truly meant everything you said and if you felt as strongly as I did. I hope you know everything I did was genuine and I wish I was enough to stop you from hurting.

how do i start? you are so fucking important to me, i don’t understand why i like you or how but i just do. i just wanted to spend the rest of my life with you. everything you do is so perfect to me, even when you mess up. i just want to spend every moment with you but i probably won’t get to because i’ll never tell you any of this... i love you :)

you may not remember the day you moved my hair out of my eyes while we napped, but i do. i think about it all the time; you mean so much to me...

you, my dear. are perfect. don’t let anyone else to u that. please keep ur head up. i love you. i wanna spend the rest of my life with you and i still haven’t gotten the guts to let ya know but please hold on for me ❤️

I wish you noticed that we haven't talked this entire time. The silence is excruciatingly painful, but it's getting better. Smile for me, Eli. I don't think we'll ever talk to each other again, but I'm glad we were friends in this life.

I had a dream that we ran away together. In the dream I held your head in my lap and played with you hair while you cried. And I finally kissed you. It felt so real.

Elijah, i love you so much. i wish i could tell you how much you mean to me, but clearly we aren’t on the same page. i hope whoever you find truly makes you feel happy and loved.

i miss you and i hate that i do. do you every think of me in that way? i miss the way you weren’t allowed to kiss me.

Eli, I don't think I have it in me anymore to reach out to you, or at least not for a while. Besides, you seem a bit busy with your life now, and I was never good at telling you the truth. Everything just feels so numb now. It's hard to keep it all up. Either way, just keep yourself happy for me, please. Find those real friends you've wanted. I hope they treat you better than I ever could.

i really wish you knew that i wanna be in a relationship with you, i don’t want anybody else, i can’t see my future with anybody but you, i just can’t continue being in a relationship with someone that texts me every other hour, you have to understand that texting is our only communication, i wish there was something we could do that fix that but i don’t think there is, even tho we aren’t together i’m grateful we’re bestfriends, i wouldn’t wanna lose you for good, i wanna keep you around as long and i can, cause the truth is you’re my whole heart, throughout time you’ve become apart of me, and you’ll always be my first love.

Three times you cheated, I tried forgiving you each time but each time u took a bigger piece of what makes me, ME. I made so many sacrifices and spent so much time trying to figure out what was the matter with me. You hurt me and I'll never be the same.

i loved you but you had feelings for her. i thought you at least liked me because i saw the way you looked at me and the way you held my hand tightly, or the way you would hug me tightly and not let go. but i guess i was wrong because when we were together i could see that she was at the back of your mind. i could see that you only used me to make her jealous. it was all an act wasn't it?

When I was going to say I had a crush on you for 4 years. You really had to move to Australia before I could say anything #bruh

you were the first guy that showed me that I'm so much more than just my body I fell for you so quickly and my heart shattered when you had to leave....even tho we were together for such a short time you managed to fix my expectations on love and I am forever grateful that I got to meet you

The day you told me my friends asked you to play with my feelings, I was set free. Thank you for saving me.

you are my stepbrother but still told me u wanted to touch me and had thoughts i was honest and told the truth about what happened but nobody believes me.

I should have told you how in love with you I was, how much your smile brightened up my day. I should have told you how the butterflies in my stomach fluttered around just because of you and how my fingers trembled when you held me. I miss you.

I wish I was better for you, I loved you the way you deserve bc you deserve the world.. you’re the best person I ever met and losing you was the worst thing ever

I broke your heart, but you broke mine first in the slowest, most painful way possible. You crushed it.

I'm still shocked over the beautiful blue rose.

I'll hold that along with you for the rest of my life.

i just wish you’d see how much i love you n care about you. im honestly only holding on rn for you. please just give me the same energy back. n stop blocking me cause of your gf. our connection is so fucking strong and she keeps trying to destroy it. and for what? she barely cares about you. please open your eyes bub. you deserve better.

I am finally over you, thank god, because I deserved so much better than you, maybe I didn't know it at that time but I absolutely did. It took you leaving me to realize that, so thank you for letting me grow and become a happier person. You broke me and had too much power over me for too long, now it is all gone.

This website is stupid and someones impersonating me. You know that if I have something to say I'll say it to your face and I'd never not once beg for your attention. Have a wonderful day bee, the weathers too nice to worry about me.

Thank you for loving me and making me love myself. You are perfect in every way. You never fail to amaze me. I love you endlessly.

Fuck you for breaking me. YOU BEGGED FOR THIS CHANCE and what it was nothing to you. Put my pride aside and went with my heart should’ve trusted my gut. I genuinely thought you loved me. You know my whole family why? How could you do that to me. I hate you. I want nothing to do with you ever again in my life. After years I’m finally over you. Goodbye

Why’d you beg me for a 2nd chance just to play me worst that the last guy. I told you what I’ve been through fuck you.

Brown..haha like coffee. I miss our talks, I'm sorry. please unblock me and talk to me. I don't want the guys in my DMS, I want you.

I'm so glad she moved away you were so toxic and she deserved better. She was too scared to leave you

I can feel us growing distant again and I hate it. I wish you would just tell me how you feel and get it over with so I don't have to keep guessing.

I wish I hang out with you one last time before you go, just the two of us like old times, because I know once you leave, I'm not going to see you anymore. I wish you nothing but the best. Take care of yourself Eli. Have fun up there.

“If the shoe fits” but really it all started a week after your fake relationship soo, if the shoe fits, right.

you are my least favorite person to exist and i wish you the worst but please take care of my baby rex

I always felt like I treated you too masculine when we were together. Turns out I was treating you too feminine. I'm sorry. I've always seen you as masculine but I didn't know you saw yourself that way too.

why can’t you see that i’m helplessly in love with you? when i remember what she did to me you’re the first person i go to. i’m sorry. you deserve better than to have me as a friend