Unsent messages to CAMERON

you really really make me
happy though, i never want to let you go. you’re really a special person and i hope we can hang out soon, i miss you even though it’s only been a couple days

I was in love with you for five years and I never directly told you. I never thought that I could be good enough for you until one day I decided that I didn't need to keep fighting for something I knew I wasn't going to get. It may have been a huge waste of time, but it was something to daydream about. I like to say that I've moved on, but I do think about you on occasion. I know that I'll never forget you, even though years after we graduate I know I'll be nothing more than a distant memory for you. I look forward to our high school reunions when I hopefully can see what a loser you've become lol. Regardless of what could have happened, I still wish you the best

i knew it was always one sided, you told me not to worry about her. i’m a fool. i hope you’re happy with her

you’re very hot and sexy and cool and i really enjoy being around you and i’m very lucky to be w someone so awesome ??

you are my best friend in the whole world. no matter how many people come and go into your life i promise i will always be here like no matter what lol. i love you so much and im not really good at expressing it but i promise i do. A LOT> you're my favorite person on this planet i literally fucking hate everyone else. talking to u always makes me feel better, talking shit abt people with u is my favorite thing tbh. tbhh... YOU SMELL LIKE SHIT LOLOL., now come over so i can give u ur christmas present u fuckind weirdo. K BYE

somewhere i know i want you to see these. my last submission was angry, i was angry. im still angry, cam. in the following days ill get over you. ive put your things away in my closet. i hope she gets whatever i didnt, i hope she never cries over you and i hope she never has to beg you to care, i hope she gets as much from you as she needs and she never has to ask for it. youre never going to read either of my submissions, if im honest, and if you do youll never be sure that it was really me who sent them. im not sad that i wasnt enough for you anymore. im upset i let you make me believe that i wasnt in the first place. i hope you never let her know what that feels like.

hello handsome boy,idk if you will ever see this... but I love you I love you no matter what even if u don't believe me I only love u I hope me & u last.

i really have feelings for you. this thing was just wrong place wrong time, we could've had something real if you hadn't left me for her in the middle. maybe one day we'll find our way back to each other.

its such a shame we are both fucked in the head. we're still soulmates to me. you're the best human I know.

If you never loved me, why did you have to trick me into loving you? you took all of me with you when you left for her.

i noticed the little changes in your texts, and it kills me knowing ur not coming back this time. i’ll love you forever baby.

yeah, you hurt me, but all i wish was that you would have been willing to try instead of just giving up. i will always be in love with you

I need to constantly remind myself that you are no longer the boy I once fell in love with. He’s gone.

I still remember your favourite colour

I want to know if your taller than me yet

And I want to tell you, you were the first one I loved and I’ve loved others but no one has loved me

its been a while, since we last spoke. i wanna check in and see how youre doing, but its not my place to anymore. its been nearly 2 years, 2 whole years since i first fell in love with you.

why did you leave like nothing ever happened between us? you promised me that you wouldn't hurt me just like everyone else has. I love you and I don't want to. Please give me the parts of myself that you took back.

I can still smell the scent of your shampoo lingering on my pillow. It reminds me of the warmth of your love that I once had.

i still dont know what i did to make you stop loving me. i dont think youll ever understand how much it hurts to know that it wasnt that you couldnt do it, it was that you just didnt love me anymore. will anyone ever know you the same way i did? did i even know you? when you said you loved me, were you just lying to me? i feel so used, cameron. i poured everything i had into you, why was i not enough? why was it so hard to love me?

I wish you hadn't blocked me. I wish you were still that person. I wish you still cared. I wish I meant something to you now.

You hurt me and visa versa. I can see you've grown and changed. I have too. Hopefully we can be friends in the future.

Through all of the lies, tears and hurt - I still care and think about you. You were my first love - I honestly wish you the best and I hope you are happy.

Hi love,

We're going through some tough times right now, me especially, but I hope you know how much I love you and how much I want us to get through any hardship. Please don't give up.

i remember when u broke up with me i acted like i didn't care. like it did not faze me at all. and i kept on having that mentality until the day at the park when i saw u and we walked around and talked about life. then i remembered how safe i felt with u, how easily i could talk to u, how much i missed talking to u. now ur bitchass is all i think about lol whoops

you made feel okay. You made my scars fade. It’s 3am and You’re probably asleep, this is the time I write my poetry; all I can think is to hope you’re okay. who knew whe’d say goodnight, for the last time.

Hey , idk if you'll ever see this or if anyone will but I was in love with you STupId but it was too late before I could relise it so hey in the future let's not be strangers I wanna know you, I wanna be your friend , I wanna support you . If we are ment to be may we meet again - love elizabeth

I'm not sure I was in love with you or the idea of you, yet you still broke me and made me who I am today

i wonder if you ever did mean it when you said you loved me those few times,did you ever actually love me?did you want to?did you at least try?

i still miss you sometimes but i also know that week of us not talking was a week when i was doing the best i had been in a while

i miss you so much even though i feel like i shouldn't. it feels so wrong yet so right. i can't let go of the thought of you and what we once were. i love you but im afraid you don't anymore. i hope you can be happy and i wish you the best cam.

I cant believe you were so stupid and stayed with her when u knew u liked me it hurts but i hope shes good for u

there's not words for us. we were just us. perfect doesn't describe us we just were who we were around each other everything would go away. I don't think I meant as much to u but we will find each other one day in a supermarket and end up eating stupid pizza on a park bench

i’m literally in love with you & i always will be. i don’t know if you’ll ever feel the same way.

The moment you told me you chose someone else my heart broke. I miss looking at my phone and smiling because of you. I miss hearing your voice right before I fell asleep. I wish I had more time. I wish I wasn't stubborn and had trusted you when you told me you were waiting for me and still loved me. It's crazy that I would have been getting ready to see you soon, that you were going to be close to you again. I wish I could feel you hug me one more time. I think about you everyday and I hope you're doing well and that you're so happy, wherever you are. I've spent months with you on my mind and I have finally come to terms with the fact that you're really gone and that I will probably never talk to you again even though I still love you. Goodbye Cam.

fuck u i hate u you had no right to do that no is no ur scum and i hate u i wish i never spent all that time wasted on you

never in my life have i hated someone and loved someone so much at the same time as i do you. what’ll hurt more ,keeping you around or finally letting you go?

You were the first guy I never thought would leave me... but here I am, alone again. It hurt so much more coming from you.

i dont hate you. i just hate the feeling of still loving you and not being able to get over it. i didnt want to leave and youre still hung up on my mind all the time. i know i cant take back the pain ive caused you to go through and i dont know how to express how sorry i am even though its probably pointless because it cant fix anything now.’ive wanted to reach out to you so many times but ive just always felt too ashamed and scared of rejection. idk. a part of me keeps wanting to think we might still have a chance but in reality i guess i just have to let you go if it’s how its meant to be. cam, thank you for everything. you made me feel like i was on top of the world. i know how much you cared about me and i never wanted to hurt you at all. i wanted to protect you by letting you go bc no one wanted us together but instead that fucked up everything more, especially the connection between us. i regret nothing more than being such a shitty ex all these years. i dont deserve you and thats the truth. goodbye.

cameron
ever since that day I met you I wanted to know you so bad, but I was too scared. until summer of 2020 came and we hanged out in my city. I love you but you don't love me back. I wish I could have you but you like others.

I constantly didn’t feel good enough. I fell in love with my imaginary version of you. I asked myself, why is it so hard? You’re not around anymore. It hurts.

i know i should probs be over you by now but theres too much love. come back home please. i need you to make me laugh and smile again x

You were my first love and probably always will be if im being honest. I just wish i could tell u everything i found beautiful abt you, everything stupid abt u, everything sweet abt u, everything perfect abt u. I wish i wasnt as upset as i am but I want us to become friends again ever since we became distance I miss all the fun things we did together even if i screamed ur ears off tubing. Someday i hope to hug u one last time. I guess i just want to laugh with u again :)

You literally take my breath away I know it’s cringe but I’m being dead serious I just wanna fucking hug you. Whenever we speak to each other just once I feel like I’m about to explode and I just wanna run my hands through your ginger hair. The only reason I throw pencils at you in maths is because I wanna get your attention and just have fun with you. You literally are my world even though you try to avoid me I really love you

You were my first love, and you will be the one I won’t ever get over, even though I can’t imagine myself being with you again, somehow I still always think of you.

well, what can I say? you made me feel so many ways and emotions. mostly pain but its whatever. kinda just want to say thank you for showing me the signs of hatred and love. you taught me so many things so I appreciate it bud. but no fr thank you for making me happy while it lasted. but most importantly fuck you, fuck you for killing me inside. you broke me in a million pieces. you never even apologised for cheating but I apologised for being sad over it. it took me over four months to get over your stupid ass, I'm finally learning to love myself. currently with a good man, who treats me well. moving on was really hard but it was one of the best things I ever did. I don't hate you and I know I should but were human, you just couldn't handle a bad bitch :) enjoy your life you piece of shit.

:P heya cam, idk which name you might put so im submitting multiple... i think youre super cool and underappreciated by everyone just because we're so used to you being the most chill, kind, dry-humour-funny (which is the best) kinda guy... please dont forget how much we care about you!

I loved you with all my heart. You have changed. A lot. I hope you find yourself again. And yes royal blue is my fav color...

thank you for making me smile. thank you for everything. you deserve someone who cares for you and makes you happy.

i love you. i’m madly in love with you. how i don’t know but i miss you so much and i just wanted you to be mine. that’s it. the bare minimum was too much to ask, now i’m left picking up the pieces.

what you did after you left cut me deeper than you do know, but i still love you after all the things you’ve done.

You hurt me a lot, I cry, I yell, I smile, I laugh because of you. But sometimes the hurt is to much more than the good, and you’ve hurt me a lot. I need to let go but I’m scared I’ll never have anyone again. I don’t love you anymore but I love the idea of you. I miss the old McDreamy