Unsent messages to GABRIEL

I want to take this moment to tell you that I regret very much for letting you go from my side, when at the time you were by my side to support me, to give me words of encouragement when I need it most, it was what I value most about you and what they did to you more special for me, because that is what is really valued in a person. I know that you may never read this but I want to wish you the best in the new relationship that you are going to start and believe me that everything that you gave me at some point will be rewarded in the best way, just thank you and sorry for not value everything you did and gave for me, now that you are no longer here is when I realize that in moments like these in which I feel sunk by myself and that I can no longer feel that everything was my fault and I lost you in my hands, but I just want you to be very happy and I hope that soon there is an opportunity to talk to you again, that you are very happy ... I write this note in black because it reminds me a lot of you, take care.

I know you already know but I love. I don’t understand why you like making me suffer. I don’t know if your just friendly or ashamed to be who you really are. Why would you answer me with cute messages and invite me to dates? If your gay: I know it’s hard even thinking about being gay, specially in our country, but why do you have to torture me? You know you can trust me. And if your straight: Why do you have to torture me by being so kind, friendly, cute, caring? Specially since I already told you I liked you. Please say something. Please be direct. Please make it stop, because I can’t just turn it off.

I may have not been your first and you might not be my last but I wish your heart never grows cold for me , I love you

Fuck you, I cant believe you. 2 years and not a single word my way, even though you knew how much I cared. I tried and im done. I missed out on what could have been the best things in my life because i thought i was enough for you. now i know im not and im done with you. for good.

i am really scared that you're cheating on me, i know you're probably not but sometimes i feel like you try and make me jealous by talking about/to other girls and i might just be overthinking it but i really like you and i dont wanna go through something like my last relationship.

I hope we'll meet again in the future and finish our chapter because it doesn't feel like it should've ended like this

I hope its me you think of at night, with her hands in your hair. Because its you i think of when my hands are in his hair. You broke me

i know that you're going to crawl back to me because it was me all this time. but i won't care because i know my worth and you obvisously don't. what a fool.

To my first love, and my first heartbreak, I wish things were different. I wish you still wanted me to be yours. I will forever have you in my heart even tho I ended things. I chose red because that’s your favorite color and it reminds me of you. One day, hopefully, you come back and I can be happy again.

you’re hurting me. i don’t think you know it but you are, i told you about how i have had problems in the past and i feel like you just don’t wanna listen.

youre not my first love but you showed me everything in life ever since you came in everything has been so colorful and full of light even though i should let go because you blame everything on me i still hold on because the stars sparkle a little brighter ever since you came into my life. i know i have trouble saying this but i love you and i always will no matter what.

You still love me?
I mean, really try to make our thing work so hard I lost myself, I'm always going to have a love, take care of yourself

I don't feel the butterflies in my stomach that you caused me anymore
p.s: this is not for my first love, but it's something I needed to say

i love you dude. but you don't put in any fucking effort to talk to me. don't ask me out do just talk to me twice a week

every little thing reminds me of you, I cant talk about you with my friends which makes it even harder. i hope i find someone like you again in my life

if i could turn back in time and fix my mistake, then we would probably still be looking at the stars together.

you are one of the best ppl I’ve ever met, u saved me when he left.Don’t let anyone treat u less then u are, you’re extraordinary.

don’t get me wrong i love you so much but i am getting a little too attached to you and if you start to treat me like shit and manipulate me and gaslight me i won’t leave you because i like you too much and it will destroy my mental health even more and right now it’s so bad and i feel like you just try to make me feel worse sometimes like today when that little incident happened i literally threw up from anxiety and it didn’t really seem like you cared, idk. but i love you and if you start to lose feelings for me or if you just don’t want to be with me in general please tell me because if you don’t tell me and then just lead me on it will make me even more upset. i love you.

no one is like you. i try to find you in every guy i come across now. you’ll always have a spot in my heart. until we meet again

hey :) ur probably never going to c this but i j wanted to say i love you. i never stopped loving you i just started loving someone else. i cant go back in time but ill always care and i j wanted to let that out

Tu étais mon premier amour, depuis j'ai l'impression que je n'ai plus jamais aimé quelqu'un autant que toi..

Tu m'as détruite et sauvée la vie en même temps. Je ne pourrais pas imaginer finir ma vie avec une autre personne. 4 ans que je n'arrive pas a passer à autre chose.

bro i think i fell in love w/ u. im sorry for that. i swore id never fall again, but that changed fast. and now, ur w someone.

hey mango. notice how this is in ur fav colour lol i just wanna say that you helped me feel actually happy. u gave me butterflies. ik ur gonna forget me but im always here for u

I miss you too much, I wanna be with you now, you changed me, you made me my best version, and I will be always thanked to you; because you showed me how the love is.

fuck i really like you, like i really really really like you, theres so much stuff i wish i could tell you but i just cant, because i dont know how to say it, and i am sorry that i am hard to deal with sometimes, like i am genuinely sorry because i complain to you about my childhood and everything bad that happens because i dont have any one else to talk too. i am still trying to get over that one boy, i dont like him at all but im just trying to get over what he did to me, he ruined me, the story is really long and he really just fucked me up and i hate him so much because i feel like im never gonna be normal again so i guess you could say im still healing?? idk. please dont give up on me because im really trying to figure this out, i know im still young but what he did really fucked up my mental health, i gave him two chances and he ruined both, and i know im stupid and i shouldnt have given him another chance but i thought he changed and im so stupid and i just want you to know that none of this is your fault and i am sorry if i am overwhelming you and if im ever being too much just tell me and ill stop, i love you so much.

Eu não sei como eu falo sobre o meu primeiro amor, fui muito feliz eu adimito, mas o final foi o pior,voce foi o meu primeiro amor, mas pensar nisso acaba comigo, porque eu fui a pior namorada do mundo, foi meu primeiro namoro e eu acho que nunca mais iriei achar alguém pq ninguém me aguenta,vc foi a unica pessoal a qual eu contei tudo sobre mim, e eu nao sei se irei me abrir novamente assim com alguém, voce sabe todos os meus defeitos, todas as coisas que eu nunca contei a ninguem, e agora meu coração doi pq eu terei que seguir sozinha gurdando meus sentimentos novamente, eu nunca vou amar alguem como eu amei voce, vc foi incrivel, eu nao conisgo entender ainda pq voce fingiu gostar de mim nos ultimos meses, eu estou morendo pq eu amei voce ate o fim, acabei o relacionamento, pq eu ja sabia a verdade, eu so queria que voce tivesse me amado de verdade, como no começo, eu nao tenho raiva de vc por isso, eu nao sinto nada alem de tristeza e uma grande vontade de voltra no tempo, onde eu errei , eu queria que vc tivesse me tido, estou te superando aos poucos, doeu de mais te ver feliz na festa, pq eu estava quebrada por dentro, eu desabei la pq eu nao sei ainda controlar meus momentos, queria te pedir desculpa pq vc aguentou meus surtos de depressão e etc, eu acho que isso acabou com vc, eu sei, me desculpa por nao ter sido perfeita, eu queria poder ter sido melhor querido, me desculpe por todos os momentos que eu estive la, e eu sei que nos brigamos a um tempo atras mesmo depois do nosso termino, eu entendo pq vc me chamou de insensivel,vc esta tao feliz, eu vejo, que bom, eu estou andando sabe, sobrevivendo, tem sido dificil eu adimito, mas estou tentando, por mim, mas sabe eu sinto falta do seu cheiro e do seu abraço,eu queria vc aqui, pq eu estou so, ninguem me apoia como vc, ninguem sabe pelo que eu passei como vc, desculpa, de verdade, vc nunca vai ler isso eu sei, eu to com vontade de te entregar todos os beijos que eu nao te dei, obrigado por ter cuidado de mim, vc foi o unico que soube como me acolher , obrigado por tudo de verdade, vc e unico e vai encontar alguem incrivel

You see it’s hard telling u that I have a slightly crush on u ,ur a good friend and I feel like we seen eachother at the mall this month and I wish we could b more than friends one day but I don’t think that well happen since ur older than me .I love u chinito lol

It's been years since we've talked but I can't forget you. I'm sure we're taller in another dimension

It's unfair. To give your all to somebody and for it to not be enough. I hope you still have that purple bear keychain that I got from Asia for you. I gotta let you go now. I always say this but please take care of yourself. I know you don't care about me, but I care a lot about you... And I might for a while. But this too shall pass.

Love, 3.

It probably looks like I'm living my life and I'm happy, but everything is just a distraction from you.

i hope you see this. but i want to tell you that i really appreciate you, i’m definitely a little overwhelmed because i’ve never caught feelings for someone so fast and with you it’s like i almost instantly liked you, i don’t really know how to explain it, you just get me. god you’re just so perfect, everything about you, your smile, your eyes, your hair, your personality, your voice, everything. i truly appreciate you for coming into my life because i was not in a good place mentally before you, and then once we started to talk i got better, i’m still not fully on track, and i’m sorry that it’s hard for me to open up with you about my feelings, just give me time okay? i love you

First, I want to say thank you for making me happy while you could. Second, I wish you the best and I truly did love you.

Ojalá fuera todo diferente, ojalá te dieras cuenta, algún día verás que no te van a querer tanto como yo...

Hey, Its been like 3 months since we last talked. I miss you, and i know i shouldn’t because you seem so happy ever since i stopped talking to you and im not going to try coming back to your life and ruining ur smile. But i want to thank you for everything you have done to make me happy, You were there when I was going through a rough time, You were always the reason i smiled everyday. You honestly changed my life and it really sucked that the last time we talked was my birthday, i really did went through a lot for these past 3 months and i’m still here thinking you’ll come back.

I love you, I'm sorry for ruining things. I know you have issues attaching and I feel so alone without you. I would do anything for one more kiss

I know I’m always the 2nd choice to everyone and I’m sry I didn’t say something when I had the chance to tell u I liked u.

if you knew how much you meant to me, in that class, but i clearly knew you woundn't be the one to stare back

me lastimaste y jamas te deje de amar por que haz sido de las unicas personas a las que he amado con el corazon

I'll never feel how I felt about you towards another person. Thank you for teaching me what love is, I hope life is beautiful.

where do i even begin. i met u just a few months ago and you've become the most important part of my day. i love you more and more everyday and i cant wait to see you. i couldnt ever put into words how much i love you. i may not be your first love but you r mine . you've shown what real love is . you've shown me how to love myself. i wouldn't even be alive if it wasn't for you. you saved my life and i couldn't even thank you enough. u make me laugh and smile sm . telling people it's only been a few months and everything we've been through together and thinking abt living the rest of my life with you sounds insane but at the same time i've never been so sure abt something in my life. i want to be in your arm and watch the stars with u and spend the rest of my life with u not just us but with our kids too. i love you.

nosé talvez me hubiera gustado conocernos más pero ni tu y yo fuimos capaces de hablarnos ,aaa si también eres un imbécil (no se juzga a una persona sin conocerla )

Cambie mucho por ti, tanto fisicamente como emocionalmente. Fuck you.
Jodete en tu propia mierda. :)♡

You’re like so polite and the compliments you give are really touching. I appreciate how considerate you are and I’m glad to be friends with you! Oh and it’s always great to have u on VC, Also stan BTS

dear gabriel,

i'm sorry for what i did to you. i embarrassed you, especially myself. if anything, i regret doing everything so much that i can't even describe it. i know you have a girlfriend now, and i know your probably happy with her.. i just want to apologize. i know right now i'm just nobody to you. i'm sorry.

Idk what it is about you that I just can't let go. I hate the way you ended things. It's been about 3 months. It hurts.

well, idk how to start. Im a cold nonopen person un less i really like you i hide my feelings about everything but you, make me feel difrent. ive known you for almost 3 years now. I haven't seen for a year but i can remember your smile perfectly. That smile made me smile makes me feel happy warm safe. If love n soul mates are real i would say i have met them and is in denial of being in love with them. You know i cant seem to get my mind off you. When im out in public i see YOU everything is you i cant get my mind off you. It hurts when i see someone on your story lol. We're young but i feel like we are right for each other. I feel blocked off like you something isnt right. Youve changed a lot since me faught, but so have i. I ruined our friend ship by making lies and belieing the wrong people. You were in love with me. I had mixed feelings. now im in love with you but you probably don't feel the same. is it just bad timing? I get what i said and did was wrong but we both need to open up to each other I need to know how you feel about me or ill forget you. You send mixed signals like your bi poler i don't get you Your all over me one day then well the total opposite the next are you playing me? should i have listened to my friends about you? All i know is i miss the old you. I miss waiting on the swing for you. I miss the random things I would talk about and you listening and smiling looking up to the sky I miss that. Now your cold n dry i don't get it. yester day i was going to tell you all this but u left me on delivered lol :) and now u added back your ex so i feel like its time to let you go. its gonna hurt but im probably better off without you but idk if i could feel this way about anyone else.

you've taught me wha real love is . i love you more and more everyday your the reason i'm still here .

i dont know where you are now but 4th grade was a blast with you. you made me feel amazing. i will never forget how nice you treated me. you were the first boy who didn't judge me because of my body. you saw me for me and because of that my standards are high making me be able to see what i truly deserve. Thank you

im scared to open up to you because of how people have treated me in the past but i really do like you i want you to know that