Unsent messages to EVAN

i know i treated you wrong in the past but I just wanna make you feel special now i love you so much.

if you never wanted to speak to me again, why unblock me? this time it’s up to you, show that you care and get over yourself and your pride or let me go, if you ever cared then at least stop giving me false hope

I don’t know how you feel about me yet. but i really am hoping you feel the same way i feel about you. you make me feel so safe and so comfortable. you’re so rare in my eyes.

6 months, spent together every second, every minute, every day spent together and yet you were never in love with me.. I wish I could believe you

I gave you all of me and you left without a thought..
And yet I’d go through it all again.. that’s how much I love you

my love, I can’t let you go because something always brings me back to you and everytime I’m thankful it does

my love, I can’t let you go because something always brings me back to you and everytime I’m thankful it does

I want you and I have wanted you since the first time I knew you. Thank you for being you and never change no matter what anyone says about you.

I hate you. I’m not mad that you don’t care or that I don’t mean much to you, I’m mad that you take advantage of the soft spot I have for you. Regardless of how much you prove you don’t care, you always come back telling me you’re sorry and I let you back in hoping things could be the way they were. I don’t miss you, but I miss who you were when we first spoke. Maybe I was too naive to see you for who you really were but thats the person I miss. And every time it ends the same. Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result is the definition of insanity. And I know we’re bad for each other and it would never work out. Idk why I care sm abt you and Idek how to define what we what, but it was something.

You made me happy when I was depressed but now that your gone I fell back into the world of depression but I still love you.

thank you for teaching me a life lesson. but now im scared to love again. idk what im going to do. you were the reason i woke up every morning and you were my motivation. my heart still stops everytime i see you or even when i see your name in my phone. i will always love you no matter how bad you hurt me though.. ?

If I could choose the brightest colour to describe you I would -you radiate positivity. Everybody who knows you loves you. You are so good. But the best thing about is that you are unaware of your effect on people. On me. You lift me up and take me to the side where the grass is greener. I don’t know if I could live without you. I’m so dependent on you and your love that I don’t know if it’s such a good thing sometimes. But I don’t think I’m wrong about you. I hope you’re here to stay. I hope I’m not too much for you. I really hope so.

And here I am, almost two months later. I will always be here for you when and if you come back but i cant let the thought of you consume my life anymore. I’ve tried, I’ve done what I can but our fate is no longer in my control. I will always have nothing but love for you, please dont forget about me and what we had.

even tho we haven't talked in months i still think of you. how much you hurt me. i truly wish i had never met u.

my heart aches for you. I hope that you know that all I want is for you to find peace within your mind

why are you complaining to me that you can't talk to julie. i'm your fucking girlfriend she's just a girl you met like 2 months ago

I’m sorry that I wasn’t good enough for you. I still care about you & love you.. I hope you’re happy with her.

you treated me so bad and when i got over it u wouldnt leave it alone. u shouldve known what u had when u had it.

I’m sorry I wasn’t ready to be with you, I wish you would give me a second chance. You are the only person I’ve ever loved and it hurts me...

I took it personally when u stopped talking to me because I never would have done it to you. when u stopped talking to me it was like you died because I knew that was the end somehow, forever. I know if it was meant to be it would have been but part of me still hopes you would come back. every memory seems fake though because now I know all you wanted was sex, and not that you genuinely cared about me. I thought we were gonna be friends for at least awhile, but all good things come to an end. I didn't want to hookup with you though I never had the courage to tell you because I didn't want to ruin a good thing but unfortunately that didn't change a thing. at first I wanted to go off on you, but then I realized you wouldn't give a shit because this was all just a game to you. you were right, you aren't a good person. at all actually. you did a great job hiding it though.

Do you think if we were to meet again in a different place and at a different time in a different life maybe we could do things properly?

im sorry but i didn’t love you for the last 6 months of our relationship, i just didn’t want change. (elsie)

I’m so sorry I got your hopes up and let you down. I hope she makes you happy even if I never got the chance.

i can’t help but wonder if you think it’s weird that i remember the little things you’ve told me in the past

i’m so sorry for everything. i miss you every day and not a day goes by where i don’t think about you. my mum still asks about you. i know you don’t love me anymore but i will always come back to you

I feel like this 2 year crush on you is going absolutely no where and it breaks my heart.. i feel like i fucked it all up, like you never wanna talk to me anymore... maybe its just me being upset with you, i don't even know.. one day you're texting me and the next week or so, my phone is a ghost town. I feel like a burden when i text you because you always say you're too busy or tired.. i feel like giving up on this,on my chance with you, it doesn't feel worth it anymore and i love you so maybe it is....