emma i hope you know how much of a great friend you are. i could say so much but i don't know how to say it but i want you to know ily and i really appreciate you

i still sometimes read your cute daydreams note.
i really want tiny versions of us. we’ll talk later, ok?
forever & always.

i wish u knew how much pain u caused me. i will never forgive u for that. at least u don’t have him anymore

i love you so much i honestly don't know if i could have gotten through things without you i don't know how I'm gonna leave you when i go to college the thought scares me because i need you so much i love you

you saved my life multiple times without even knowing it, i really need you right now but can’t say anything.

I'm sorry I was a bitch when we were younger, I said things to you that you somehow managed to forgive. I will always be grateful that you found it in you to forgive me because you mean so much to me. I'm sorry for the pain you're going through now, I want to help you but I don't know how

I always looked forward to our hugs in math. Thank you for being there. You may never feel the same, but just know I love you.

I don’t believe you really meant all the things you said Monday. when you said you don’t see a future with me at all. that this is forever and there is no way you’ll ever come back. I really hope you didn’t truly mean it. Because I still see you in my future. I have this strange gut feeling i’m still gonna get to see you in another white dress.

I think you just said it because you knew you had to cut the tie all the way to actually get me to leave. Because I told you I’m only ever leaving if it’s truly what you want. and I don’t think it’s what you want but you barely have enough energy to love yourself, and you put other people ahead of yourself so until you learn to take care of yourself, you won’t be able to love someone else in a healthy way.

I don’t want you to give up on your dreams and hopes and aspirations. I fell in love with the Emma who didn’t want to take her husband’s last name. I mean I still think Emma S sounds good but you can keep the C if you want. I want to encourage you and support you as you aspire to live your dreams.

I know officially we broke up but my way of thinking about us is more like we’re just on an actual break. a real break.

and I still don’t want anyone but you. that hasn’t changed.

I can’t get you out of my head. and I don’t want to.

I know this feels like we threw our hearts through a garbage disposal.

I read all of these to Ian every day and sometimes I worry that one of the hopeless ones is from you and you didn’t sign it. but then I find yours.

I don’t know how to do this either. I still want to text you about every little thing. but also all the big hard things I don’t really know how to say.

and I want to hug you and play with your hair and hold onto you really really tight and never let go.

I know it just feels like a black hole right now. But I see light at the end of the tunnel.

I think God is giving me peace in reminding me he loves you somehow even more than I do. and it might be selfish but I think i’m your soulmate and we’re better together in the long run then apart or with someone else.

I’m going to keep wearing my ring everyday.

and I’m going to keep writing you a letter every week. and I still have my vows on my dresser with your letter. and all the photos you gave me. I wish you had kept some for yourself.

I think i’m just scared that if I be your friend right now, and only your friend, that you’ll lose all the other kind of love you had for me. and I really don’t want to be in love with my best friend who only sees me as a friend.

I’m sorry if that’s selfish. I still haven’t made my decision. because I want to be there for you however you need me to be. you’re still my best friend. but I also put everyone else before myself and i’m learning to get better at taking care of myself but idk what I need right now.

I’m gonna write you a letter soon. one that I hope you can read and re-read, and hold onto when you feel like things will never get better.

I don’t mind waiting for you.

I found an article that was talking about situations where a breakup actually leads to a much stronger and healthier relationship. and I believe that’s what’s going to happen with us.

I still get scared sometimes. but it’s weird - I think I finally get what “peace that surpasses all understanding” means.

I pray for you constantly. and for us.

I wish you knew what goes on in my head but I don't think I'll ever be able to put it into words. I hope you're okay and I hope we get past this. I love u

I am sorry and you know that i am. Our story wasn’t supposed to be like this. We were such great friends and we should have continued to grow up together. I miss you and I hope one day I can show you all the real letters I’ve written.

Aquel 9 de septiembre de 2019 me rompiste el corazón. Espero que a ti todavía te duela como me duele a mí al verte.

I’m sorry i didn’t appreciate you when i should’ve. but you hurt me, and i know we don’t talk anymore but i really cared about you.

We had some really good times Em. We we're getting so close, I loved you a lot. Why did u have to fuck it up? I don't miss you, only the laughs we had.

my precious baby. the future is ours and we're gonna make it beautiful. two days till i'm home forever

You. Need. To. Stop. With. The. Toxic. Boys. ?
Ok but literally you’re so pretty, kind and just like the way you are is so amazing:)) most people don’t see it because you don’t act 100% yourself. I mean you do your really out there but...actually idk you are mostly yourself with other people but idk when I see you talk to other people it doesn’t give me ~Emma vibes✨~ you know? But yeah anyway you’re great ???

emma, i called you my best friend after stella. I had trauma and it felt like everyone i got close to would leave after her. But you stayed for me and i felt a bestfriend's love again. But of course, you are leaving now too. Please just explain it to me. Why are you lying and avoiding me? Why are you pretending like i dont exist? I called you my best friend.

That night you cried over your ex and I held you close, I wanted to tell you I still loved you. Now it’s too late. But I still do.

I don't miss you. You were awful to me and while I did love you, I don't anymore and I'm glad you're not a part of my life anymore. I'm better off without you.

i don’t think i’ll ever look at anyone else in the same way i’d look at you and be in awe of your beauty. falling for you was one of the best and worst things i did. oh

When we cuddle on the couch I wonder if you can feel how fast my heart beats or if you can sense my gay panic

hey emma, im sorry we are not besties anymore. hope your doing well. love you always, even if we dont talk anymore.

I love you sm... i don’t know how to say this.. i know you used to like me but you said you didn’t anymore... i’m just scared that wasn’t a lie. i was going to ask you out in october so the song “we fell in love in october” could be our song. i guess i’m not doing that.

dude, where do i even start. the first time i met you in 6th grade camp, i knew right away that i wanted to be your friend. you’ve always been so funny and sweet and charismatic, even if you didn’t or don’t notice, everyone around you admires that. you’ve honestly helped me through so much and i really do hope i can be more like you one day. you’re so easy going and i hope you find all of the happiness you deserve because life sucks, but i swear it’ll get better. i truly did mean it when i said i’m scared of ft anyone but you because with you it’s comfortable. so thank you for that :) i don’t know if you know this btw but you’re so pretty, if i were you i wouldn’t let anyone tell me i wasn’t the main character. LOVE YA

hey em, i know we dont talk anymore and im sorry, i still remember all of our memories. but i guess in a weird way things are meant o be the way they are. it kills me sometimes to not talk to you. wish you the best and will always love.

your my bestie forever and I love you so much. You have brought so much happiness into my life and I could never thank you enough. You’ll never understand the impact you have made on me. Your also wise beyond your years, even if you don’t know it yet. Chase your dreams Emma your gonna do great things. Also stick with that dragon tattoo, It’s gonna look sick ;) love you more than you’ll even know. Your beautiful inside and out

Honestly don't know if I'll ever forgive you. But thank you for helping me see that I was surrounding myself with toxic people who were further harming my mental health. I was trying so hard back then to help other people and forgot that I needed to practice self-care as well. Thank you for letting me see that you only cared about getting close to the guys in my life and not being friends me. When you stabbed me in the back, it honestly broke me and created more trust issues than I previously had, but I've built myself back up with the help of true friends and am finally on the path to loving myself and being happy. I promise myself that I will never let myself get back to the person I was during our friendship, who stayed with people who hurt me and didn't care about me or my happiness, only their own and what they could gain from me. I will strive to live my best life, so thank you.

I want to share your address

I seriously mean it every time I say Forever & Always

p.s. if nightmares become real life please fill me in

stop being a fucking try hard your not funny ur not cool omfg i hate how perfect you try to act but sometimes i want to rip ur head off i’m not even kidding

You were my crush when I was "straight". Can't imagine a day without you. Love you forever you funny funny girl.

dear bestfriend, i miss you so much that it hurts... we dont talk like we used too... i cant lose the only person that helps me forget the pain i feel.

I don't know if what I felt for you was love. Even though our friendship didn't turn into more, I miss you

i don't know whats happening to us. i still love you, but you don't seem to love me. i have a feeling things will be over soon. why do you always leave? why do you always get scared and freak out and blame someone? i wish i knew, maybe i could've helped.

I know we haven't known each other for very long but god I'm grateful to have you. I just want to eat Skittles w you at 2 am and watch old movies and talk about life and shit. You're the best. I've been hurt a lot and I'm always so worried I'll scare you off but you're such an amazing and funny and creative person and I feel like you really get me. Love you. ⛄

i miss you & im sorry for all thats happened. I feel like i ditched you and that wasn't my intention. I needed space.

How did we get so distant? Our friendship meant the whole world to me and now we barely talk :( wishing you the best in everything you do though

ur straight so u won’t ever like me. and i don’t think i love you. but there’s something about the way you exist that’s so mesmerising.

I want to thank you for showing me what a true friendship was. but I also want to tell you that I am better off without you. its just sad that such a good bond can be ruined because of parents

I’m just gonna keep writing to myself when I’m feeling upset over him.
Drunk again because that’s the only thing that makes you happy. It’s going to get worse before it gets better I think. I need you to stop loving him. Please.

you broke my heart. i want to be mad, but i know you didn’t mean to. it just really sucks when it doesn’t work out.

i thought someday we’d get married and adopt a couple kids and paint the walls neon green. i guess not.

I came back to write one more of these and then never again. I honestly don’t know why I keep on doing this and writing you these, I hope you will someday see them as I know your friends know about this site. I hate myself for everything and I wish I could turn back time and change this mess I’ve made with you. When we saw each other recently, you looked so different so beautiful. You’ve always been beautiful but your hair was longer and you were a bit taller then the last time I had seen you. I could tell we were both anxious and I felt tongue tied, like I didn’t know what to say to you anymore. I should be telling you this in person but I just don’t know how, I know you don’t want anything to do with me anymore. I can tell you’ve changed and are more closed off with me and I understand. I am just happy I got to see you one last time like that, too see you, too have you around me. It calms me. I’m so selfish when it comes to you, I want you all to myself even though you would never expect that of me. I’m sorry I stopped talking to you, I realized that I am not good enough and never will be. It is so hard to have to force myself to stop thinking about you. I am trying to forget everything that happened between us, I want to forget it all. Because it’s easier that way. You probably think I don’t care but it’s the opposite. I need to forget but I also hope you might text me and you tell me you love me. But you’ve never been good with emotions and neither have I. I just want to talk to you, I don’t know what we would talk about but I just want to talk. I tried calling you on the last night of communication but I saw you ended it before the second ring and I realized that I needed to just stop. I hope you know that when I left you, I was at war with myself and my life. Now I’m changed and I hope you see it in me. I know I will see you in the near future but we probably won’t talk, it sucks because we have such limited time until the end of school . I hope that maybe one day we can meet again and we can explain to each other what really happened. Maybe then you and I will understand better and we will understand each other but until then I will have to try to forget.
2 y

I came back to write one more of these and then never again. I honestly don’t know why I keep on doing this and writing you these, I hope you will someday see them as I know your friends know about this site. I hate myself for everything and I wish I could turn back time and change this mess I’ve made with you. When we saw each other recently, you looked so different so beautiful. You’ve always been beautiful but your hair was longer and you were a bit taller then the last time I had seen you. I could tell we were both anxious and I felt tongue tied, like I didn’t know what to say to you anymore. I should be telling you this in person but I just don’t know how, I know you don’t want anything to do with me anymore. I can tell you’ve changed and are more closed off with me and I understand. I am just happy I got to see you one last time like that, too see you, too have you around me. It calms me. I’m so selfish when it comes to you, I want you all to myself even though you would never expect that of me. I’m sorry I stopped talking to you, I realized that I am not good enough and never will be. It is so hard to have to force myself to stop thinking about you. I am trying to forget everything that happened between us, I want to forget it all. Because it’s easier that way. You probably think I don’t care but it’s the opposite. I need to forget but I also hope you might text me and you tell me you love me. But you’ve never been good with emotions and neither have I. I just want to talk to you, I don’t know what we would talk about but I just want to talk. I tried calling you on the last night of communication but I saw you ended it before the second ring and I realized that I needed to just stop. I hope you know that when I left you, I was at war with myself and my life. Now I’m changed and I hope you see it in me. I know I will see you in the near future but we probably won’t talk, it sucks because we have such limited. I hope that maybe one day we can meet again and we can explain to each other what really happened. Maybe then you and I will understand better and we will understand each other but until then I will have to try to forget.
2 y

i hate how things turned out . i still love and miss you everyday. we hurt each others hearts in ways that were unbearable. i know it wasn't supposed to end like this . you were the first person in my world that could make me genuinely laugh out loud uncontrollably. i wish we were still best friends . i hope you still think about me as much as I think about u. if you see this text me so we can do molly together again ily.

if i could take it back i would im so so sorry i know its been so long and i havent apologized yet but i feel like i have to forgive myself before i can forgive you in the end i fucked up and you did what you felt you had to. hope things are going well for u with him

Ellie misses you

Not as much as I do though.

Judah asked about you the other day and I nearly cried

driving home tonight I nearly turned left onto 216 but I stopped myself. I just wanted to be close to you for a minute. well, longer than that

now i’ve just spent the last hour looking through our photos

i long for the day we can take more together again

sorry for sending another one of these when I said I wouldn’t. you can call me sometime if you want

A&F
ian

you don’t know this, but you’re my first girl crush. you’ve shown me what real forgiveness and change is. thank you.

i know it probably won’t work between us but i would be down to give it a try if it means i could be close to you.

I know it’s in the past now and we’ve moved on from it but if that night didn’t happen, would we be strangers again?