Unsent messages to CALEB

I'm sorry I overthink everything. It's not that I don't trust you. Or that I think you'll cheat. I'm scared to open up about myself. I don't want to get hurt. I love you

that night when we were talking about our lives together you looked up at the sky to admire the stars and when I glanced at you I knew I had loved you

i thought you would be different but no, you used me and i thought you cared about me too much to do that.

I saw you once while walking down the street, fate or some shit brought us back together, and then life tore us apart

I wish I knew how to talk to you. It’s been so long and we’re probably two different people now and I still regret it

if you see this i just want you to know that i stopped liking you when you accidentally spit cheese in my hair

i love you for everything you’ve done for me. and i hate myself that i’m so unstable that you worry about me so much. i’m sorry. i’ll never leave you. i love you to the moon and beyond dumbass. forever and always.

Why did you lead me on? You got me to admit that I liked you, yet after that you brushed me aside. You flirted in front of me with other people after, and I'm sorry if I sound clingy if we weren't even technically a thing, but why would you pressure me into actually admitting it when you were going to go out of your way to talk to other girls in front of me literally the next day? I'm sorry if the feelings I had bugged you, I truly am. I just wanted to know why you were so persistent to get me to admit it when you would act like that the next time you saw me.

I'm not mad anymore, I'm not sad. Things are just different now and that's ok. you turned to a whole different person. I sometimes miss the old you, but with the old you comes all the pain, heartbreak, and stress. I am finally doing better now and you can't just appear out of nowhere and expect us to pick up where we left off. I am over you now, all the pain slowly went away as we were drifting further and further. you were MY person now you're just a person to me.

We were supposed to be together forever. I guess things don't always go as planned. I hope you do well in life, but just know I won't be there for it.

thank u for being my person. ur the first person i tell everything. please dont forget me, i wont forget u. i love u so big

I'm sorry, I was never enough for you. I fell out of love with my best friend. I miss you more and more each day. I hope you're doing well and you've moved on. I love you and I always will.

god i hate you, sometimes i wish i never met you but when i’m alone at 3am there’s a part of me that wishes you were here

um you were a really sweet guy, but i just lost feelings for you so i'm sorry. ik that you're over me but whatever. i'm kind of glad that i ended things with you tho bc you strongly disagree with feminism and BLM and everything else and are a trump supporter so yeah. i would say fuck you but my mom taught me to respect others opinions so whatever

The moment i first knew: We were in year 5 or 6, and i was just sitting at my desk, i looked up and you had just walked into the room, and we instantly made eye contact and the biggest smile formed across your face and i felt butterflys in my stomach. Seeing you smile from then on was something i looked forward to. Everyday I hoped that we would somehow talk, or something would happen between us, but i mean we were just kids. fast forward, and I still like you. its been 5 years, but i was too afraid to tell you how i feel, and when i did i didn't even say the half of it, i said "Yeah, i like you". and you said "sorry, I don't feel the same way". Those words kind of tore me apart. I acted like it was cool, everything was fine and i didn't care one bit, but reality was i cared way too much, so so so so so so much and honestly I wish I didn't. But here it is, the message that I never sent, that I really, really wish I did. Okay look you make me happy, seeing you everyday puts a smile on my face and honestly I think you're really cool, your so chill, and nice to everyone, so friendly and positive. Don't even get me started on your smile again, and your eyes, they glow in the sun, everything about you is so perfect. At least that is what I would've said back then, all those months ago. I'm slowly getting over you, and I guess now that I am not obssesed I am starting to see the flaws in you, it's stupid to think that i'll ever be truely over you. Anyways, If you ever come on here which is probably very rare I hope you know that you broke me. It wasn'y your fault in any way whatsoever, but I think i'm ok now. I hope you're happy and that you find someone special that makes you as happy as you made me. :)

I liked you for so long to the point where i thought it was love. I never liked anyone as much as i liked you, you consumed my life for 5 years, but im done. no more. I hope you know what you could've had. Anyways i understand that not everything is gunna work out in life. I'm moving on, peace out, hope life treats you well :)

You make me so happy and I don't really know why. I love how I can talk to you about anything and I don't want to lose you. I'm not going to lie I will probably be upset the day you get a girlfriend because that means you like a girl better than me. I like it just being the two of us. I know I'm your favorite out of our friend group. I guess I don't want us to get older. I want us to stay like this forever. I love you, dork. I want to tell you so bad but I don't think you would ever say it back even in a friendship way.

Thank you for being my medicine. You somehow just magically make me feel better about anything. That night when we talked on the phone for hours I knew I loved you. I don't know if I mean it in a friendship way or in a romantic way but I love you dork and I am too scared to tell you.

it’s hard to interview you as if we’re strangers when my mind is focused on how much i wish i could lean over and kiss you.

I will never love anyone the way I love(d) you. I hope one day you’ll see how much people care about you.

Never want to loose you and everyone. You are always there for me no matter what and I appreciate you so much. One of my best friends.

I’m sorry I didn’t return your love enough. I’m sorry you gave up on me, even though you said you wouldn’t.

I wish you knew how I felt about you after all this time it's just been enough. You've nonstop talked to me about who you are actually in love with and it hurts a lot, it really does. I hope you have a good future.

Dear Caleb,
I still care about you. I've never met someone sm like me. Sincerely, the dinosaur girl ♡

I love you with all of my heart. I never thought I would ever find someone as good as you in my lifetime but here you are. I can’t imagine a life without you

You have no idea about the pain and heartbreak you put me through. I wish there was a way to make you go through what you did to me. I never want to see you again

caleb, i genuinely hope that you are happy. i think that you were my right person, wrong time. i'm sorry, but i needed to, and still do, need to work on me before i can make anyone else happy. you were my first love and i will always love you.

caleb, i genuinely hope that you are happy. i think that you were my right person, wrong time. i'm sorry, but i needed to, and still do, need to work on me before i can make anyone else happy. you were my first love and i will always love you.

you ruined me. i was head over heels in love with you. when she dmed me and told me i wasn't the only one, i lost a part of my soul.

i love you, the things i would do to be with you. you are my first love and i lost you so fast. i wish we lived closer :/ i cant stop crying theres so much i wanna tell you buti dont wanna bother you and i really need to get over this and move on unfortunately. ill never forget you, you brought me out of my shell and ill never be able to tell you how much i appreciate you. you deserve the world im sorry i couldnt be the one to love you but im always here for you ill love you forever.

i’m so sorry i can’t fall in love with u like that. pls fall out of love with me. it breaks my heart to break urs.

You think that I was too scared to tell anybody about you because I didn't love you, but really it was because I was scared of reality.

caleb, i hope you know i would cry if you were my soulmate. you treated me like shit and didn't care. fuck you. fuck you. almost cheated on me twice but knew I was so goddamn in love it wouldn't matter. fuck. you.

I loved you but you couldn't see it, I tried to show you how much you meant to mean idk if our memories will even last.

You mean so much more than words can ever explain. Your the first guy that ever made me feel confident about myself. I’m writing this the day after you told me you love me. I hope things work out. I hope we end up together like I dream of. Thank you so much

I’ll never be able to fully explain it or show you, but you really changed my entire life, I never thought I’d make it this far. Everything just seems a little brighter, a little nicer with you.

I wish I knew why I grew so attached to you after a couple days. You’ve been gone for months now and it’s still hurts.

And no matter how much I tell myself I’m over you, whenever I see my phone light up, a part of me always hopes it’s you.

thank you! i appreciate everything you have done for me. i hope you are happy with what you did, sure as hell i not lol but its fine ig

I cut off most of my personality because it reminded me of you. I cut off my friends because they were always around you. I cut myself because I needed something to calm me down from you. Yesterday, I saw a girl wearing sweatpants that were the color of your eyes, and I had a panic attack. You know, you're wrong. You're wrong because I don't deserve this. I don't deserve this. You're my brother, and you were my best friend for so long. You used to be the only person I could even talk to. But that doesn't matter anymore. It's just one year until you move out, and then I can stop doing this. I need to stop talking to you, for my own good. You know, our eyes aren't the same color. They're both green, but yours are too green, too intense. Mine are lighter, more gray. And I'm so fucking grateful that I don't have to look at your eyes every time I see myself the mirror. I might act like your friend, but it's one more year and then this is over. I hope you're okay out there, I really do. I want the best for you because you're my brother, and I love you so much. But you hurt me more than anyone else has. I don't deserve this, and I don't deserve you.

i love you with my whole heart. u made my heartbeat u were my life support. u were the one. u are the love of my life. my one and only.

no matter how long i go without seeing you, every time i do all the feelings come rushing back. too bad i will never get to love you the way i want to because you don't feel the same way

Thank you for showing me what love is really supposed to feel like. You'll always be my first everything

you’ve hurt me more than once. you’ve chose her every time. i wish you felt the same way. but after sending this, i’m letting go.

I want to get over you I really do but you make it so hard how am I supposed to stop loving those eyes and that smile.

If only you knew how much you hurt me. You could’ve just said that you weren’t ready instead of choosing to ghost and block me. I still seem to love and care for you though.

why did u have to do that to me i have done everything in the world to be everything for u and u just break me again and again and yet still want to be apart of my life? but i can’t say no because no matter what you do to me I’ll always take u back a million times over

you're my soulmate, we both know it. right person wrong time couldn't have been any more true. ill see you soon

I gave you a part of myself that I didn't give anyone else, so I could receive your attention. That's the only part you've ever wanted and that has caused me so much pain.

You piss me off so much but then I see your smile and your personality and I cant help but smile and forget all of the stupid times and stupid things you've done. I dont know how you do it or what. You are not the most attractive person, you have your flaws but your personality makes me not see them. Your personality makes me see YOU. People say that your screwed of you smile at their texts. So I guess I'm screwed because the littlest text from you (maybe even something really stupid) makes me smile and laugh. I can't describe how you make me feel or how you make me feel this way it's weird and indescribable.