I know you're hurting, those 2:30am walks don't mean nothing. I need you to stay here with me. Please

i hate myself everyday for not realizing. im so in love with you, you hurt me so many times but i can’t stop wanting you.

You hurt me really bad, some things you’ve done and said are unforgivable. But even though you’re with someone new there’s a part of me always being pulled into you, I think I’ll miss you forever

Why did you have to leave me, when all I wanted to do was love you? I prayed for you ever single night, how could you take my faith too ?

hey.. u might not see this, and i don’t want u to bc that would be too embarrassing. but, let’s get to the point. my feelings for u r kinda awk- sometimes, i think i don’t like u and others i think i do... it’s so weird- idk if i like u or, i like the idea of u liking me.. awk right? when u send me pics of ur hair just to make me feel better, u don’t know how i can’t stop smiling. i don’t want u to like me some reason, bc if u did, ppl would be like “oh date!!” and i don’t like that, at all... but, if u do like me too, don’t tell ANYONE, nor me.. i don’t wanna write n e more. i’m smiling too much.

i wonder everyday what your final impression of me was, i hope you're happy now. i wish we could meet again as new people.

You're so fucking mean. Me and my friends tell you we forgive you but we don't. You outed me Nate. You were one of my bestfriends and you fucking outed me. I don't bring it up because everyone knows you're a homophobic piece of shit. I hope Serenity doesn't like you back. Good luck with life babe.

Love, the gay girl.

The night we met you were constantly on my left, I even commented on it. Now I expect you whenever I turn to the left only to be disappointed when you aren't there

You made that night so special by just existing, I loved every part of you, the way you did the stupid smile, the way we practiced that handshake, the way you helped her stay safe, the way you squeezed my hand, the way you leaned against me, the way you hugged me as many times as possible before I left. I can't stop thinking about you.

When you said your favorite color was purple I couldn't help but smile, but when you put wonderful on your wall my heart melted, when you told me Goodnight Beautiful I knew

I can't even comprehend my feelings for you, all I want is you, and I know you like me, so why don't you talk to me

Halloween night 2020 was the best night of my life, not because of the party but because I met you and for that, I will never forget it.

That night you were on my left, constantly. I even mentioned it to you. Now, whenever I look to the left I expect you to be there smiling at me. I can't even describe the feeling I get when you're not there.

I know we were meant to be with each other but It just didn’t work out. Maybe in another life. I love you.

i had another dream about you last night. in that dream, you held me in your arms. i wish it wasn’t a dream.

I know you hate being called Nate and probably will never see this but I miss you. I miss what we had, our beautiful friendship. I know I’ve been a bitch the last few times we talked, you didn’t deserve that treatment at all. You unfriended/unfollowed me everywhere and I understood why you did it, I’m not mad. I wish we ended things differently. –S

I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner that I loved you. I’m sorry that we will never know how things could’ve been.

I dont know if you felt how I felt too even though I thought you did. but i truly think it was a right person wrong time thing.

hey nate. it's riley. today simon accidentally introduced himself as barry. it was funny, but then it got all quiet and no one talked for a while. we all miss you. mostly me and simon, well mostly me. but ill never tell them that. it feels weird without you here. it's a lot quieter, but not really in a good way. I definitely laugh a lot less. there's this new guy that has to work with us for a few days and he made a sex joke and alisha accidentally called him nathan. you're still with us. at least in the ways that matter. the new guys name is ivan. he's okay. his presence seems to be enough to distract everyone else from you being gone. but i know when he leaves it'll just go back go sorting clothes in silence. it's only been two weeks since the accident, but it feels like its been a year. everyone keeps asking me if i'm okay. what do they expect me to say? yes? i'm sorry I haven't visited you yet. I keep going there and then just not taking the final step. I'm scared. i know that even if you're there in spirit it will never be the same. i know you would have wanted me to move on. and i've thought about it. but i've decided that i'd rather wait for you my whole life than to find someone who will never be able to make me as happy as you made me. for a while i thought you would come back. i thought you were pranking us. kurtis told me that if you were pranking us he was gonna beat your ass wheelchair or not. speaking of kurtis. he tried to help too. but it doesn't work like that. god a group of people like us and somehow none of us could save you. i'm sorry. i cant stop thinking that if i was there i could have helped you. i could have pulled you back up. or something. i dont know. i feel like its my fault. if i hadn't been with alisha and kelly. kelly says its no one's fault and that what's meant to happen will happen. which would be helpful if i believed that this was what was meant to happen. i don't know. i guess some part of me still thinks that you'll show up here one day and make a joke about wanking and we'll all laugh and it will go back to normal. this can't be the way this was meant to happen. i promise i'll come visit you soon. i know it must be pretty lonely down there. did you find our friends? they let me have your stuff. i dont know why they just did. someday i'll wear it. but right now i know i can't. anyways. i think you would like ivan. he's real easy to make fun of. that always seemed to be your favorite quality in someone. you'd probably say he looks like one of floops fooglies. he kinda does. i think kelly likes him. i don't know. i miss you. i wish you would come back and make fun of me for being whispy. and by the way i am not whispy. my body is just a little confused on what state of matter it wants to be in. i'm sad that we never got to see what you could do. some part of me thinks you can come back. but i think you would have done that already if you could. i don't really have much more to say that hasn't already been said. but i'm scared to stop writing this. i feel really close to you right now and i know as soon as i stop i'll lose that. maybe i'll go see you tonight. im sorry that we never got to see where this would have gone. i miss you.

i keep thinking you'll come back. i'm sorry i wasn't there to help you. no ones been the same since the accident. please come back. i miss you nate. we'll definitely be having a communal crank. the old circle jerk. - casper (riles)

i keep asking myself why i love you, and i don’t know the answer. i just want the best for you and for you to be happy and loved, but my feelings aren’t reciprocated.

I’m glad we met, and I’m glad we kissed and had fun. And I cannot wait for all of the days we have ahead

our love story ended the first time because no matter how hard we fought it, time was against us. it ended the second time because you became a different person after losing me the first time. i only wish you the best

i hate how u say u like me and want to be with me but then see u talking the same way to other people. Even if it’s a joke, you don’t know how much u can hurt someone w that.

it is actually your fault that your a P.O.S dont blame it on me hun. figure yourself out:) then get back to me

I miss you. more than you know. more than I wish I did. idk what happened, I just want to know if you're okay. imy

i feel like you’re gonna leave me again. i’m sorry for being so over emotional around you, it’s just the only way i feel you’ll care about me.

i love you & always will , i didn’t mean to hurt you , & we don’t talk anymore bc you’re gross & they stuff you joke about isn’t funny to me ❤️

i always check my name to see if you wrote anything for me. do you ever read these? do you know which ones are to you?

I love you and I can't not think about you, but I have to forget you. Even though I thought breaking up was a good idea I didn't think losing you completely would be an option. This is the only thing I didn't want, that's why I was in with breaking up and healing, but in reality I didn't want to lose you. Even though we aren't good for eachother and we influence eachother badly I still long for you, your smell, voice, hands, or even your presence. I don't like you at the same time. I can't think of our good memories without seeing the bad ones. You weren't who I thought you were. I don't know if I can ever forgive you even though I love you. I am sorry for that, but it's how I am gonna get over you.
Sophia

no matter how bad you treated me i’ll always welcome you with open arms. i wish i could fix us but it will never go back to how it was, i hope you’re happier now more than anything.

if u really loved me like you claim you do, why would you cheat?
why can’t you just leave me alone to move on.

i think this will be the most mature thing i've said about you. i'm finally at a better viewpoint: not in love with you, yet not bashing you to make myself feel better. for starters, i made the background white because i feel like i was pretty blinded when i liked you and i don't know what color would represent our friendship. anyways, its strange, you show up in my dreams often, but i don't think about you. i won't have thought about you for a week, 2, maybe more, but suddenly we're dating in my dream. i don't get it. i mean, i've liked people since you, i've moved on. why are you still there? i've started to consider our relationship (friendship), and why i was so in love with you. it was only a crush, yet it lasted years. sometimes i felt like you just understood me, you read me without me explaining myself. it was new and it made me feel loved. remember the staring contests? you had the prettiest eyes ever, i hope you know that. i remember facetiming a lot before we really stopped talking. i was so awkward and so scared but i loved being around you. you had the best humor, it was dirty but i thought it was hilarious. i miss that. i don't know if you remember, but you had a nickname for me. it was annoying when you'd call me it, but you know i secretly loved it. i guess a lot of the time you gave me a sense of worth. not a lot of guys took interest in me, but you seemed to. yet even with all of that, and so much more, you still made me lose my identity and my confidence. you, among other things, just brought me down. i can't entirely make it your fault, but i was fragile and the way you made me feel sometimes just broke my heart. i one day decided to stop talking to you, i don't know if you noticed. we used to snap a lot but i stopped because you said something on a yolo about me and it stung. i guess i realized i was better than that, so i decided to let you go. looking back on it, i'd never change what i did that day. i needed to love myself without the approval of others. losing you and a few other people let me do that. anyways, i'm not sure why i'm doing this, i just got on the website, got distracted, and you came to mind. i doubt you'll ever see this, or realize it was from me, but if you want to, give me a text. you're a good guy & i hope you're doing well.

i just want you to mature and figure out whats important who is really down for you. i want you back but not if your going to treat me the same. how did you let go of those past and our special bond like no other. you were my person. your family was mine. ive never felt safer than i do when im with you. everything has memories with you we did everything together. how am i the only one effected by this. i dont know if i will ever stop loving you.

you always seem to make me remember all the feelings and memories. though our time is up, ily forever

I had a dream about you after your last text. It's been two years. Please let me move on... I sometimes look up my name on here and imagine that you're finally being honest.

you used me. we were best friends and i loved you. i still do. but when i think about that night i feel sick. you may be used to pulling that shit, but on me? when i was that drunk? i hate you.

I always deserved better than you. I forgive myself for not seeing that until you were already gone. -the summer girl

sometimes I miss you. I miss being your friend although I know it will never happen again. I know we've hated each other ever since but I cant help think of how things couldve gone.

I just want you, but I know that’s just hopeful thinking. I wish things were different between us I wish you saw me how I saw you.

I feel empty when I think about a life without you. But I also feel empty when I think about a life with you. What do we do?

i would tell you i miss you but i was never what you wanted in the first place. i love you, i’ll always be here if you ever need anything. im proud of how good you’re doing.

i am so beyond in love with you still, i would do anything to be with you cuddling watching 90 day fiancé right now and just being happy together. but we are five hours away, and in two months we will he seven hours away. as i am going to have an official boyfriend later today, i would like to let you know even though we were fwb at first, and kept it that way, there is nobody in this world that compares to you. i always said i would end up marrying you, especially when i left for college and we still talked regularly and it was amazing. i absolutely love you, nate. i wish you the best. i will still talk to you, but not with the same light and hope as i did when i knew i had a chance with you but didn’t want to ruin what we had at the time. you mean more to me than you will ever know.

i legit started talking to you three days ago...i have never fallen in love so fast in my life. you make my heart flutter

The last time I was in your arms, I almost told you I loved you. But I didn’t, because our friendship is important to me.

you knew me so well. for an entire year. we were like best friends. i could tell you anything. eh oh well i wasted a year of my life oopsies

i hope she breaks you in ways you didn’t think you could be broken. also biden won, no need to butt fuck trump anymore

i really liked you. it hurts me to see the way your not affected by this at all. do you not care about me at all? i miss you
-.

Every day I wake up and all I want to do is talk to you. I miss you so much. This is heartbreaking. Please text me.

sometimes i go back and try to relive the moment i fell in love with the u i loved now i don’t even know who u are.