Unsent messages to JONATHAN

you will never know this is meant for you but.... i do love you. you have been the only person that i can talk to with out a care in the world. your smile is what I hope to see in heaven

You were my first love. I loved you. You never loved me back. When I tried to move on you came back to me just to fuck me up. Now you are happy with someone new. It hurt at first because I begged you to treat me like how you treat her. Hope you and your new girlfriend last. Love,...

I’m sorry i wasn’t able to be that special person in your life. If i could start all over again and make it better, i would.

You showed me what a happy and healthy relationship was like. At one point I thought I was falling in love with you, but you still broke my heart.

Creo que no demostré lo mucho que te quería por miedo a que te aprovecharás, lo siento pero eras mi prioridad me enamoré tanto de ti que me olvide de cómo era sin ti, ahora que ya no estás se siente un gran vacío quisiera verte una ves más, a cada lugar que voy anhelo que estés ahí aunque sea imposible, y la verdad no sé porque si tu me lastimaste tanto aunque me quiera cegar yo nunca te hubiera hecho lo mismo y si lo lograste, me derrumbaste, al fin siempre fui una más que conseguir y lo hiciste, que mediocre que eso te dé algo de felicidad, y aún así te sigo esperando pero sabes tengo que seguir como tu hace tiempo que lo hiciste, tratare de dejarte ir pero ya no eres lo mismo para mi, y voy a lograr salir de esto, créeme.

i miss you sm. i miss talking to you. we haven’t talked since november. i just need a sign... i need to know you still care.

Jonathan, I'm so sorry, I miss you so much and I need to tell you that I love you, I'm sorry I didn't I was too scared. I love you.

I liked you for months, i forgot how long but i knew you would never like me back. i cried over you many times especially when you texted my friend calling her pretty, now i don’t even think about you. once the clock hits 12:00 tonight, you will officially be in my past. fuck both of you.

You ended it terribly. You acted hella petty, and that just ruined it for me. I gave you a god damn chance, but you just ended it dramatically. I hate your petty ass, fuck you jonathan! ???

hi. i’ve wanted to tell you for so long, but i love you. more than you could ever know. for the longest time i didn’t realize how important you were to me, but now i realize it. and i’ve never felt this way about anyone before. i was always scared of love and getting hurt. but now i realize that even if you don’t feel the same, it’s worth the hurt. i hope even if nothing comes of us, that we’ll still remain friends. i don’t know what i would do without you. you’re all i think about. and i don’t just want you, but i need you. when it feels like everything’s wrong, you make it feel right. your hugs, laugh, your contagious smile. i chose this yellow because it reminds me of happiness and sunshine, and you are like a beam of sunshine, always keeping me happy. you are so kind and loving towards everyone. you may be a little weird sometimes, but you’re my weirdo. and i adore you for constantly being yourself, no matter what anyone thinks. you keep me happy constantly. sometimes my laugh and smile are fake, but not when i’m with you. you just make me feel safe, and when your arms are wrapped around me, it feels like home. i don’t know how else to describe it. but sometimes i just feel like you were put in my life to make sure i’m safe and happy. i miss you so much, and i really hope we can talk about this some day. even though you won’t feel the same, i just need to tell you how amazing of a person you are. you saved me and you didn’t even know it. so yes, i love you. hopefully one day you’ll understand how much.?

my jinji, i still think about you, my heart physically aches. soon enough my mom will stop asking about you and so will my heart.

i still dont know if i liked u fr or not. I still think about u, and i wish i wasnt so mean. You did not deserve it. I know u have moved on, but i havent.

i knew you manipulated my feelings against me but I still followed you into the deep end and dove heart first

you leaving wasn't what hurt the most, it was you turning all my friends against me which keeps me up at night

thank you for actually caring. it means the world to me. you will never see this but that made me feel like i have something. thank you so much for checking up on me randomly today. the only person who has asked if i was okay. and you really really wanted to know. but thank you.

i still carry hope in my heart that u will come back to me one day. i haven’t stopped thinking abt u since the day u left me for her.

why did you have to make me feel so comfortable on ft? why did you have to smile at me when i was looking away... why?

I don’t know if we were supposed to end up together in the end or not., but your my person and I’m Always here for you .

I’m not mad that you don’t want me. I’m mad that sometimes you act like you do to take advantage of the soft spot I have for you because you know in the end I’ll come running back to you.

i still make scenarios with you in my head, and it feels like you still here.
it's better this way x

I don’t blame you for leaving, I blame myself for creating an idea of you in my head that didn’t exist

is it that hard to be honest and jus tell the truth?. u rlly have to hurt someone to the point that they have tried comitting 3 times so that u can have 2 females at the same time, that fucking childish

when i kissed you i thought i loved you. but then i saw you with her, and realized i’ll never be good enough for you :(

You came back to me when she left you. You left me when I needed you. I still try to forget your face, but the image of your eyes is engraved in my mind

To jonathan (aka daddy shark) in the hopes that you see this one day , I miss you so much and I wish we could talk, obviously after everything that’s happened I know we will never be able to have what we had again but I hope yk that I will always be there no matter what when you really need me and that I truly did love you so much and everything is out of my control right now. Forever and always, D (aka mommy shark)

Ya ha pasado un tiempo desde que nos separamos, todavía no sé porqué no podemos estar juntos, ¿Qué nos pasó? ¿Por qué ya no lo quisiste intentar?, ¿Te volveré a ver?, no sé pero realmente te extraño, ya había olvidado este sentimiento, y si sufro es porque realmente te amé, no sé si te sigo amando, no sé si me sigues amando, no sé cómo olvidarme de ti, no hay un día que no estés en mi cabeza y eso me duele mucho, porque ya no estás en mi vida, y yo te amo demasiado.

No matter what I'm always gonna be by your side. Thank you for always pushing me forward. Thank you for always understanding me. Thank you for reminding me that my past doesn't define who I am today. Thank you for making me a stronger person. I love you to the moon and back

I am over you. I’ve been over you. There are days where I don’t miss you at all. There are days where I wish I had never met you. There are days I wish you had gotten hit by a bus. There are days I can’t stand even the thought of you. There are days where I can’t hold back the tears, there are days where I pretend you are still laying next to me. There are days I can’t stop thinking about you. Every single day, I miss you. I miss the bad and the good. You have left you-shaped holes in my heart and I miss you so much. I miss your stupid faces, I miss your laugh, your shitty jokes. I miss the way we got each other so easily. I miss you. I miss you so much. I wish you would’ve cherished me as much as I cherished you. I wish we could’ve met sooner, I wish we could start over. But it wouldn’t work. You are an idiot. The biggest idiot i know, in fact. But you were my idiot. I love you, asswipe. Treat her right. When I say I’m here for you, i mean it. I love you.

I miss you every day bubs. I hope it gets easier for you, you deserve it. Treat her right. I hope we’ll meet
again soon. I love you, asswipe

where do I even begin? nobody ever loved me like you did, and i never loved anyone the way i loved you. i was not the romantic type, i never did any romantic gestures, til you. the way i poured my heart out into every single one of those letters i wrote you, all those plans all those gifts and poems, better left unsaid.

i miss u. i’m too afraid to admit it but i do, but u act like we don’t even know each other anymore. it hurts

Sometimes I feel like I'm just a chase to you. But what exactly is it? What exactly does it mean to be drawn to the “chase?”

my heart aches so bad thinking of you finally coming back. it’s gonna hurt so bad when you leave. plz stay.

sometimes I wished we could've finished the last episode of that anime together so I don't have to think of you when I finish it

je ne sais pas trop comment l'exprimer en anglais donc je vais écrire en français, je suis désolé à l'avance. si tu veux, tu pourras essayer de le traduire sur internet (malgré le fait que je me doute bien que tu vois ce message un jour). jonathan, malgré la distance qui nous sépare, je suis tomber en amour avec toi. enfin, je crois. il y a jamais personne qui m'a traiter avec autant de gentillesse et de douceur que toi. tu étais dans mes pensées tout le temps, je voulais crier ton nom sur tous les toits tellement que j'étais heureuse, je voulais devenir quelqu'un d'important dans ta vie. honnêtement, je ne sais même pas si c'était réciproque. je crois que oui car quand je repense à toutes nos conversations pendant l'été, elles allaient parfois au dessus du niveau d'amitié. on parlait du fait que tu allais venir me visiter et vice-versa. mais après, tu t'es détaché de moi. sans me donner d'explications. tu avais l'air plus froid et moins intéressé. tu gardais tes réponses courtes. je ne sais pas pourquoi tu as fais ça. était-ce à cause de moi? le jour que j'ai appris que tu étais revenu sur le site de rencontre où on s'est rencontrer, j'ai eu l'impression que tout a chamboulé. je sais que nous n'avions aucun statut officiel entre nous deux et que rien ne s'était passé de spécial mais je veux que tu comprennes à quel point ça m'a blesser. je voulais être la seule que tu trouvais jolie. je voulais être la seule que tu faisais des blagues avec. je voulais être la seule qui te faisait des playlist. je voulais être la seule dans ton cœur. je n'aurais jamais dû m'attacher aussi vite et ce, aussi fort à toi. je sais que "je t'aime" est un terme un peu extrême mais je t'appréciais beaucoup et je pensais déjà à des plans futurs ensemble. est-ce qu'elle te rend plus heureuse? est-ce que ton humeur va mieux? je ne crois pas avoir réponse à ses questions. je veux juste que tu sois heureux. c'est tout ce qui m'importe. malgré ma jalousie, je veux que tu saches que je t'aimais. je t'aime jonathan. je ne vais jamais t'oublier et j'espère que c'est de même aussi.

ik i was such an asshole to you but jus know that I actually loveyou and i always will and im always here for you no matter what...

I wish i never begged you to stay. now i wish i could tell you how glad i am that you left. i’m finding myself. finally.

I loved you when we were in elementary but you left. I saw you again in middle school but all you did to me was to laugh at me and make fun of me, it made me so insecure. Then High school came along and I thought you were more mature but no you were the same person that was in middle school was. Then we entered college and you finally gave me a chance and we started to date for a couple of month then became years. But last year was the worst year ever because I found out that all those years I was lied. I also found out that those years we were dating was all for a dare. a FUCKING DARE. we broke up the next day and then a year later from the break up you called me to tell me that it was a dare when we started to date but he ended up loving me but I didn't believe you. you kept insisting so we got back together but that was the worse decision ever, our relationship became toxic and fucked up my mental health was also fucked up. We broke up months later because I had enough of it and I don't regret breaking up with you. I am doing fine now, I learn how to love myself, and that I don't need no man to make me feel better.

I still think about you everyday and how happy I would’ve been with you. It hasn’t been the same since

i am sorry I am not all you wanted and you hurt me so much bc u turned out to be everything u promised not to be. you'll always have special place in my heart cuz u were my first love and I'll love you no matter what

i really loved how we used to play games together for hours on end. do you still wanna play sometime?

You are truly a good guy and no matter what I will always love you. But I have been dwelling on you for so long and it hurts knowing there is no chance. In another life I think we were meant be soulmates but not in this one. You will forever hold a special place because you are my first love but here is the thing you are not my true love and that is why I need to let go.

i miss you and the cuddles and ur humor and spending time with you but things happen for a reason ig :/ u seem fine without me so i'll let you be :)

you help me break down my walls and see me for my soul and not just my anxiety, but i know you dont feel the same way about me

when we went our separate ways i realized how ugly you treated me but i still love you and nothing will change how i feel about you.

we've known each other since we were kids. You were my childhood crush, always asked me if I was okay. But we lost connection and now you have a gf. I'm happy for you, honest. But I question myself, what if we never lost our connection? Would we be something now?

although it’s not my fault i really wish we would’ve met at the right time, and that you would’ve been patient. but i’m happy now, you’ve helped me figure out what’s good for me. his names kyle and he’s the one.

Hi jonathan, i know your straight which is what makes this whole thing harder but i just wanted you to know that i fell in love with you the first day i met you, and when you got a girlfriend it broke my heart, but i got over it because that sorta thing was bound to happen anyway. I love you, but you are not mine, and i cant control that so i have to let you go.

So we haven't talked in forever and that's okay. You messed me up I trusted you and loved you but here we are. We were family and you betrayed me. Its understandable to some extent but come on you didnt have to talk about me when I wasnt there to defend myself. I thought you were better someone different but i guess I was wrong. I hope your happy really I truly do. I just wanted to say this because I never got to say good bye so this is what this is Good Bye.

hi, i really dislike you, but i still keep finding a way back to you. I wish you felt the way i did for you but you don't :,).