Unsent messages to AVERY

I know it seems like there’s no reason for me to be the way I am. But if you knew my life maybe you’d understand. I’m trying to be better.

you will never know that i'm in love with you, but know that you're so perfect in my eyes. wish more than anything that we were more than best friends.

I’m not sure why you put up with me for so long. I really thought you were the problem back then. Your smart for moving on and cutting me off. I’m not mentally healthy and you can probably tell that. I’m trying to be and I really do care. I wish we could talk but I get it if you never want to again.

I know it’s selfish of me but a part of me hopes you didn’t fall in love with someone new. I want you to be happy but I just wish it could be with me.

You seem happier now. You seem like you fell in love with someone new and stopped pining over what we had. The bitterness between us was only because we cared. But that doesn’t mean it was right. Maybe things weren’t meant to be between us but I’ll always remember you in the back of my mind. I’ll always be looking for for you in a crowded room.

We both had feelings for each other at some point. You don’t have to tell me but don’t lie to yourself. I get why you do though. I wouldn’t wanna have feelings for someone like me either.

You love more than anyone I’ve ever known. Don’t be upset when people don’t give that love back, it’s not your fault

I was dumb for thinking you ever really liked me. I wish you would’ve just told me you were messing with me.

when my kids ask me what love looks like I wanted to bring them to you but you left...where did I go wrong?

i love your eyes. my favorite thing. so dark and perfect. it’s the only thing i remember about you that i could put into words

You don’t know this but I’ve already been through enough suffering in life. I don’t have anymore strength in me to push through someone who doesn’t allow me to learn to love my self. I need to keep moving forward and the way you treated me was only pushing me back. I wish you a good life but we just aren’t meant to be.

I wish I could show you the physical impact that night had on me. I couldn't stop for a year. And I've got over 60 scars to prove it. Take a step back and focus on someone other than yourself.

I blame myself a lot but you really hurt me & it doesn’t even seem like you care. At least not enough to own up to it.

Let me sniff your feet they probably smell like cheese oh my god i cant stop thinking about smelling your sweaty toes im so fucking cool ahhh im a dad let me sniff.... do it stink

Haha, I really really like just as a friend but I’m jealous of you. You and Evan are so happy you have so many friends and you are so pretty but it’s ok because you don’t like me as much then I like you I love talking to you

I didn’t mean to hurt you. I wish you knew how much I was hurting inside back than- I’m sorry for putting my pain into you.

i’ll never forget our 3 hour talks while watching the stars and laying down on the air mattress we stole from walmart.

I wish you would have told me how you felt, cause I felt the same way but I was too scared to ever tell you. I miss you, come back

I really wish I could tell you how sorry I am for everything. I wish I could explain it all to you. I’m glad you seem happier.

I get it if you’re confused about where things went wrong. But do you really believe that this whole time you didn’t do a single thing me wrong?

I wish I knew if it was really you leaving the messages under my name. I commented back to them btw- I just think it takes time to show up. I’ll tell you the reason if it’s really you. Can you leave a smiley face under my name so I know.

I wish I could tell you how sorry I am. I’m confused and hurt by some of the things you did but I handled it in the most awful way. I was in a really bad place and I didn’t even know it myself. I hope you’re doing well.

Why are you so perfect when we're a lone, but when we're with anyone it feels like you're a whole different person?

I wish I could just get up in front of the school and tell everyone how much I love you. You're an angel, darling.

We were never best friends, u replaced me the first chance u got. I don’t trust u at all, but I miss u so much

i dont know how i fell in love with you but i did. youre the first thing i think about when i wake up and the last thing i think about before bed. the way you get so enthusiastic about your video games is adorable. i truly do love you so much and i wish i could tell you that.

i am so in love with you. every time i see you my day immediately gets better. the way your eyes sparkle and the way you smile when you’re happy is something i love. i'm so sure that you’re my soulmate regardless of the situation we’re in right now. i love you so much.

hi!!! i love u!!! im in love with you!!! i appreciate you!!! so very much in love with you!!! ok bye i love u!!!

i’ve always wanted to be loved so unconditionally by someone and i truly feel like you do. whether or not you’ll ever admit i know you love me and everyone sees it. i love you

i am so in love with you. you are the person i want to spend the rest of my life with and i mean it. im convinced youre my soulmate no matter what the circumstances are. i love u

We both fucked up so much with each other. I’ve grown so much and have become a better person from reflecting on my mistakes. I put in work to change. I’m just worried you haven’t done the same. I’m scared that if you haven’t you would put me back in the dark place I was before. I want to try understanding each other instead of arguing. I want us both to put down our “defensive walls” and I want to grow together. I think we just hurt each other because we’re too scared of letting each other in. But it takes strength to be vulnerable. I can’t leave things so bad and it’s clear you can’t either. I know I’ve hurt you so much and I never wanted to. You’ve hurt me too but I genuinely believe your a good person, you just need to accept yourself and understand you’re bigger than what’s hurt you. I pushed you away before because I was scared you were gonna put me through the same shit again that you did for months. I’ve been through a lot of pain in life but am now learning to accept it and grow from it. I hope you can do the same because I know you care about others. I miss you. I can now say I forgive you. I wish you the best and I hope we cross paths again because it wasn’t meant to end like that. I don’t want us to hate each other. You can always contact me- just be honest and vulnerable and I will too. I finally feel like Im strong enough to show you I care. I’m genuinely sorry for how I treated you and I forgive you for everything.

you get mad over the stupidest things and u take everything too serious. ur a self centered bitch who only cares about herself. start having emotions bc no one will like u when u have no personality.

your not as pretty as you think you are. tbh ur kinda ugly. your personality sucks ass. looks can only get u so far. You're so stuck up and a bitch. no one really likes you.

sometimes when i don't like the way i look in my glasses, i remember how you told me i looked beautiful with them on. or how whenever i felt insecure about my looks, you'd always reassure me that i was your perfect girl. i guess that was a lie..

i miss you, and i don't want to admit it to myself. i don't really know why i miss you. i don't really have anything to miss. but when i sit back and think about ev everything that happened between us, i can't help it.

I want you to be the person I finally let in but I lose hope in myself everyday. I think it's best for you to move on because I don't think I can be the person you want me to be.

You're my best friend. I love you so much and I hope you know that, but I'll say it here too just in case.

hey avery just want you to know that you mean the world to me and you're the best thing thats happened to me in a while. love u so much

You are my best friend but sometimes it feels like I’m only important when you need me and I wish that wasn’t true.

why did you leave me? it still hurts so much. i miss you please come back i promise things will different this time

honestly, i've completely moved on and I don't hate you anymore. I kinda wish we could just be chill but I feel like it wouldn't end well. also I got dumped haha vibe check

i'm SO glad we aren't friends anymore but just curious.. do you think of me when taylor swift comes on? i bet you do

I wonder how you are and if you remember things the way I do. I miss the blue light and the way your guitar echoed through the house. I miss your hand on the small of my back during my night mares. You always made sense in the strangest way and I’ll never know if you truly loved me the way I loved you. I know we were young but I thought it was us. I really did. Tell pretty boy he’s loved.

everytime i see or read something with your name, i think about what we could have been. I think about how even though you didn't love me back, it should of been us in the end.

You never appreciate what you have till it’s gone. I wish you’d actually have feelings and not fake them.

I know we don’t speak much anymore but I want you to know that I still think about you all the time. I still love you and I wish I could have you back but I know you don’t even think about me anymore but I do all the time and my friends say that I shouldn’t but I can’t help it, I truly felt like you were my soulmate but you moved on pretty quickly.

you used me. you broke me to the point where i didn’t want to live anymore. it’s terrible that i’ll always miss you.

Hey. You don’t know it still, but you were my first heartbreak.i’m not mad at you for it. you had no clue. I was so ready to love but you weren’t. i can’t blame you for that. i understand.

i love you forever. you have saved me and completed me in ways nobody has before. thank you for being my best friend, i hope i can return your goodness one day.

I'm sorry. We both just wanted different things. And I was trying to be someone I was not. You deserve to be happy :)