Unsent messages to DAN

God, why do I still love you? You have moved on, I haven't. I'm so sorry I'm still so deeply in love with you.

When I told you that you used to upset me and that it didn’t happen anymore, that was a lie, it still does. Whenever you’re mad at me I still get upset, like right now. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, maybe I have attachment issues but whenever ur iffy with me it upsets me and negatively effects me so horribly. I just want our relationship to be smooth, with no bumps and I want to be with you forever I can’t imagine my life with another person.

Hey, I will always love you. But f you for telling me you needed me and then leaving me without warning

You said we’d get married and then one day you stopped. It was like I embarrassed you - I knew. You ripped me up inside and out. You chose her not me but I can’t blame you because I would too.

I thought you were my first love, I was wrong you were merely an amazing friend. I wish I could still talk to you but I don't want to hurt you more

I’m finally over you. I hope you find your Prince. I wish I could hear about all that’s happened in your life since I broke it off. Wishing you good health and happiness. Thank you for being a light in my life when I needed it most. I cant thank you enough.

You felt like home to me, now I’m stuck in this place wondering how can I save us, but I know we fell apart long ago

i wish i understood how i felt about you before i ghosted you. it breaks my heart thinking of what i did. you mean more to me than you'll ever know

No matter what we went through, I’d go through any amount of pain to have you back in my life. I love you

i used to think about you all day, every passing moment i thought about you. Now's there's nothing to think about.

I saw your message and I don’t really know how to respond because I can’t remember the last time a guy has been so kind to me and understanding about my mental health and trauma. I’m glad it’s not as one sided as I thought! Next time you’re down and the lockdown is over we’ll have to have a big sesh! And I don’t agree with that in the workplace!:p

i love you and i hate that i don’t know how to stop because i feel like i’m hurting you by getting so jealous of other girls and by hating kay so much

I hate you, a lot. I don’t know why I still talk to you but sometimes I had wished you death. It’s not your fault though, but mine, I believed you lol

u were the first boy to ever care for me and make me feel safe, thankyou for ruining it and giving me major trust issues now bro

I know it didn't mean nothing to you. It scared you that we got so close and I'm sorry I couldn't do better for you.

I'm sorry. I hope your gender appointments come in soon. I just wish you the best, and will never contact you again.

i love you and i want to spend my entire life with you but i know that will never happen. loving you caused me so much pain, i have to move on. i never wanted to leave you but i think i have to. i'll miss you so much and the thought of never seeing you again hurts so much but it's time, goodbye dan x

dan. u where my best friend, my closest friend i thought it was always gonna be us, everyone around me said that it was us. but i guess not, all things r ment to be ans we r just ment to stay friends.

I hate you. You broke me, you broke our friends and then you thought you could come back? I wish you all the best, truly, but I cannot say I like you.

I thought I was over you. Then I saw you, and all of a sudden it's like we're on my lawn again talking about the stars.

where did i go wrong. why did u leave. why did u choose her. i thought we were in love. was i just a game to you.

Llevo tantos años deseando ser alguien para ti que ya olvide como fue que comenzó todo esto, en serio me gustaría recordar... Soy tu amiga y he decidido ignorar todo lo que siento por ti. Pero me atormentan los latidos de mi corazón, o cuando mi respiración se entrecorta al escuchar tu voz.
Estoy segura que no es tu físico, ni siquiera sé si sea tu forma de ser...solo es una sensación extraña.
Eres mi primer amor, un amor tan unilateral que da pena, pero no puedo hacer nada más que ignorarlo ya que al parecer de rehúsa a irse de mi. Seguiremos siendo amigos, seguiré negando mi amor por ti pues aún tengo la vaga esperanza de que llegue otro amor que sea aún más fuerte que el que he sentido por ti todo este tiempo. Todo esto me lástima mucho pero al menos estás, al menos puedo consolarte y ayudarte a conquistar a las niñas que te gustan, al menos puedo verte feliz con algo que yo no puedo poseer, algo como el amor correspondido.

It is easier to despise you than to actually admit that i loved or possibly still do love you. I dont hate you. I just wish you hadn't fucking changed. I wont forget how you made me feel but i have to let you go now because whats done is done and I cant put any more of my time or tears into an image of you that no longer exist. I wish I wasn't scared when i liked you, right person. Wrong time x

I disagree...we're not on any specific terms. I don't know about 'being friends again,' but I will say it's odd not knowing you anymore. You were a best friend and now a stranger. I blocked it all out so well. Too well. I feel like I forgot it all.

I know how dumb this is but i’ve liked you for forever and I just want to thank you for existing at the same time as me. You’ve changed and i’m glad you have, i hope you find her, i appreciate the strength that you give me every time we talk. say hi next time you see me in the corridor please, you’re the only bit of normal left.

I have no other words for you other than love. When i’m with you even if it’s only a minute it feels so perfect and so right that i just want to stay in your arms.

My heart will never love anyone the way it loved you, and it breaks me everyday that you don't want it.

I still think you're my soulmate, even though you took my heart and shattered it into a million pieces.

I wish I knew if you felt the same for me as I do for you. You deserve so much better than her and I know could show you that if you’d let me.

you destroyed ever inch of myself worth.
why as i never enough for you?
why did you say u loved me when all you ever did was hurt me?
you never loved me just loved how much i loved you

I had a real quick crush on you but honestly, it was your personality. I didn't feel good enough to match it

I miss you and every time I think I've moved on, I see you and realise I haven't. it's been over a year.

I love you, and I wish from the bottom heart we could be together. Never felt this way about anyone before :(

you weren't supposed to get over me for a 12 year old with her tits hanging out and no top lip. come on dan

You made me feel so special, staying up till 3 am to talk about life. It was the validation from you that I needed, it’s what I wanted. It’s crazy to think about how that all left when you ignored me the next day. Was I no longer good enough? Was just I joke?

When strangers in the street smell like your cologne I feel my 17 year old heart break all over again

i cant even say i don't know you anymore because i’ve known all along i just didn’t want to believe it.

i still want you as bad as i did when i first met you when i should want nothing to do with you. i wish you loved me still the same. i know nothing will ever be the same and that not only kills me but eats me alive really. i think about you almost once every day time and time again, i wish i could get you outta my head.. but at that i've become so numb to the feeling of missing you and i've gotten so good at hiding being sad about you. time seems so endless without you here & days just seem to drag with no meaning sometimes i wish i could talk to you about how my day was and what's going on. i wish i had the words to fix this, to fix us. i know we will never be together again but my heart thinks other wise.. i know whats meant to be will be. in the end i went in not knowing what true love was or having someone care more about me than i do myself felt like and i couldn't have asked for anyone other than you to be that person. my soulmate that i may or may not have lost.. i love you still, with every fiber in my being.

fuck you for what you did to me and her, and to think you have the audacity to come back with a shitty guilty apology a year later. just fuck you lad, fuck you.

you were my yellow, i rlly thought you were my soulmate but then you broke my heart, you left me, broken and alone. you broke me but it´s okey i think. i forgive you if you forgive me to not be enough.
love you forever
M

I wasn't falling in love with you, I was falling in love with a version of you that only existed in my brain and you played along with that.

i was wrong about you. i loved you with all my heart but that wasn’t enough. it won’t ever be enough. thanks for teaching me love isn’t easy. goodbye

you are the only person i could ever hate. the only person who has broken my heart, it shattered when you r@ped me. we didn’t date. i didn’t love you like that. but i did love you.

i put so much effort in to get nothing back. i treated you like a fucking god and you threw that away

I know that you don't feel the same way as me and that kills me because i know that i don't deserve you and i never well and even though you've made that clear multiple times i still can get you out of my head.

i hate you, but i’m in love with the idea of you and can’t let go of the memories, please get out of my head

Remember the time when we were drunk, sitting by the pool, listening to music and talking about the universe???

You mean the world to me but I know you don't feel the same way. whoever you end up with is going to be lucky to have you.you will always have a special place in my heart.

i dont know if its worse that i wont ever see you again or that i still feel this way about the idea of you

I never told you but I did fall in love with you. I still think about you and dream of the day we can reunite.