Unsent messages to SOPH

I've written poetry about you; good and bad and warm and cold. You were worth poetry.

you're the most amazing person to ever exist i'd literslly do anything 4 u

If I reached out, would you care?

i remembered your birthday but you didnt remember mine

Reach out and show me you're the one

not everything is as deep as you think it is

it doesn't bother me that we don't talk anymore but I will forever yearn for you

do you feel ashamed when you hear my name?

Too much and nothing happened because you wouldn’t let it

:/ still want to talk to u

even if i didnt do what i did, we wouldve stopped talking

why did you lie to me.

i miss you.. <3

i loved you with everything i had and i still do, i know i've distanced myself but i had to. it was for my own wellbeing and for yours as well. i have so much love for you and i always will have, however i can't go back, i outgrew the past already.i love you forever b, there's not a day that goes by without me thinking about you, but since what happened you've made me feel ashamed in a way no one has, as if no one ever does mistakes and it ate me up alive. i'm just human and that pressure that i bottled up inside of me from the situation was let out, and since then i haven't seen anyone or anything the same way. i don't feel the way i used to around you anymore, the pain always find a way back to hit me when i'm in your presence . i love you forever b, you're mine. you're one of the best things that happened to me and i'm sorry it had to end this way. i hope you're doing well.

-

A part of me is still holding on to the memories of what once was but I’m truly happy for your relationship. I think you two bring out the best in each other and you absolutely deserve that.

I long for the simpler life I enjoyed with you. Although my past may be rose-tinted, I'd swap all I have for another lazy weekend with you...

I honestly don’t know what to write, just that I want to talk to you again. Proper talks, those deep talks we used to have. I miss you even though you’re still here, I think you see that you’re not right for me anymore but I know you’re right for me, and that hurts the most.

I hate u , urve changed and I hate you for it . U showed ur real self and with that I leave ur life for my own worth .

i know no matter what ill keep falling in love with you over and over again and theres nothing i can do about it.

I sent video messages just so I’d get to hear your voice when you’d respond.
It was my favorite sound

when i first met you, i thought i was looking in my dream. you laughed so softly and your smile seriously made everyone so happy. your so angelic. everyone loves you, how could they not? your long golden blonde hair, raging eyes and strong willed stuborness is hard not to become attached to. your beautiful and I've become consumed by you and your presence. sophie, you will forever be my first love. i hope someday we will work out.

i love you. thank you for always being there for me. you’ve made such a positive impact on my life and i don’t know where i’d be without you. i love you so much. thank you for being you.

i am beyond thankful thank we are friends again. i really think there are friend soulmates, i also really think you are mine. you make me laugh so hard i piss myself. piss. on. the. floor. you give me the best advice, you are my sister you are my best friend. i never am actually nice to you in person so if you find this it will prob make you uncomfy. you are still a little hoe bag but i love you more then you will ever know. thank you for being my safe place, thank you for coming back. i love you dumbass.

i'm trying not to let my brain trick me but if it keeps saying it maybe I don't actually like you. I wish I liked you as much as you seem to like me. I'm scared to be happy.

i wish you all hope to get through all the things you may be struggling with and i hope it all ends well i love you :)

i dont think ive ever said soph on one of these before because it hurt too much. im always gonna regret breaking up with you even though it was the right thing to do. you probably wont even see this but i wish you would. i still cry i dont thinking i ever or ever will stop caring about you. it hurts to know that you think i fucked you up because i did my best to make sure that didnt happen. you didnt do anything wrong. lets clear that up. it was me. i only resent how our friendship after fell apart. i really hate you for that. but unfollowing you on socials helped. im not fully over you. if i was i wouldnt talk about you all the time. you know how much it hurts to get a message off you every once in a blue moon and its like were strangers. i dont love you anymore but i still miss what we had. if youre still reading, reply to this just so i know someone listened. i dont know if you remembered but it would of been 1 year last week. the fact its not is all my fault. till next time, anon

Hey even though I'll never know why you ghosted me just know I thought of you as a good friend and I don't hate you for it. I'm sure you had your reasons and if you ever did wanna reconnect I'd probably say yes. This isn't a "first love" type post as much as a lost friend type post but hey it works

In these pink pajamas all I can think of is your hand between my thighs and your lips on my neck as your body laid on top of mine.

youre sticking around and staying during the hardest times of my life and it doesnt go unappreciated. i love you more than i can ever say. you stayed when i first opened up and youre staying when im loosing myself. i dont even know whats going on or who im turning into. you saved my life and i will be endlessly grateful. you mean everything to me

i feel guilty about how much i think about you. barely knew you but still in my mind. i hope we're still going to greece.

I’m sorry I push and pull. I’m a wreck.I don’t want to drag u down with me, but I’m selfish and keep you

My Elio,
How many times do I have to tell you that I'm in love with you, for you to realise that I'm not joking? I wish it were easier. I wish I could take all your pain away, every bad thought or emotion you have, and just keep you safe. I wish I could protect you.
Sincerely,
Oliver.

You were special. But the thought of you will remain as nothing more than the remnants of what once was and what could have been. Echoed throughout the hallowed halls of my past.

I'm happy that you're out here growing and going for what you want. Keep at it and don't stop. Regardless of whether we're by each other's side or not.

i don't think i'll ever forgive you for what you've done to me and i'll never forgive myself for letting you do it.

fuck you you're such a piece of shit I cant believe how much you hurt her. I just want my friend back you asshole, why did you break her like this