Unsent messages to ROHAN

I really think we could’ve been something

Don't be scared to admit that you loved me, imy alot dummy

i love you always.

Man, you really broke my heart. We could've been something.

Hey brother from another mother I hope you are living life to the fullest. You are bound to do amazing things :)

u were the only one that stayed when you found out my true self and i fucked that up and now you're gone :(

it's rare enough that i'm alive at this time, in 2021. but you, being alive, at the same time too? that must mean something to you. it's like a phenomenon that out of the 7 billion people on this earth fate brought us together. why can't you see that we're perfect together? stop changing who you are to conform to what you think will be good enough for me. i fell in love with you, not someone that constantly shifts character to match mine. i wish you could realize how much i want to get back together. i'm in such pain right now and my heart is unwilling to accept the fact, maybe, just maybe, even if you are my soulmate, we won't end up together forever. i know we're just teenagers who don't really know shit about love and life and this crazy insanity of the world but the world doesn't feel crazy when i think about it with you. you give me such a sense of care and peace. you are the only person that understands me and constantly matches my energy. you give back all the love i give you and more. in a perfect universe i'd end up with you. in a perfect universe i'd wake up next to you and our dog and cook and bake with you. in a perfect universe you'd show me how to skate and surf and i'd show you how to paint and make clay art. in a perfect universe we'd bake a cake together and go to the beach to watch the sunset and eat cake while telling stories about our lives and our childhood and our dreams and our future. but all these dreams will simply stay dreams. i know i should let go. but if i let go, what happens if you don't come back? does that mean you were never mine to begin with?

I still love you. I do. And you reached out to me yesterday. You said you still loved me, and you had loved me since we broke up. So why did you hurt me. And why are you hurting me now. All you want is my body, and you'll be over me in a week. But I still love you. Maybe I'll let you use me. I need to feel loved again.

i loved you and it fucking ruined me. fuck you for lying fuck you for leading me on. i’ve never fucking gotten over that shit and i still don't know if u meant any of what you said.:(

i wonder if things would've been different if i was good enough. you were nothing but an angel to me but all i did was push you away because i was too scared that you'd leave. it wasn't supposed to be your job to decide what i needed and i got so caught up in my problems that i couldn't give you what you needed. i love you so much. i would do it all over again if i could. i just wish i could be in your arms again.

hi rohan . you prob wont read this but i want to write it because idk. we broke up 3 weeks ago and i honestly feel a lot better than i thought. but it gets worse every day and i miss you so so much. i don’t think il ever feel this way about anyone else ever but that’s okay because i don’t think il want anyone apart from you. it’s kinda sad bc a part of me still thinks we are gonna get back together lol. i think that us still talking as friends is probably not a good idea since it makes me stay in love with you but i don’t want to lose you so idk what else to do. it kinda sucks bc it felt like you gave up at the end of the relationship and that hurt a lot. but il always love you rog

i fell out of love because i created so much doubt in your feelings for me that i created a wall to block out mine.

i did have feelings for you it was just hard for me to tell you. you waited so long i know and i was about to tell you. but fuck you, one interaction with one girl and you left. i can never trust again. i hate you.

i wish we never met. i wish i wouldn't have to see you everyday. i forgot about you but now... you're back. i hate it.

I don't think you know this website and if you do well, that's embarrassing, anyway open ur eyes dummy.

There are so many reasons why we can't be together. One of those is that you are a senior, and another is that we both don't want to hurt her. But even if those obstacles didn't exist, you only see me for my body. You knew I liked you and you used that to your advantage. I still wish that we could go back to that week at the beach before we hooked up and you saw me as a friend instead of an object. I really miss being able to talk to you genuinely without feeling that tension. And the worst part of it all is that I still like you even through all of this. When will it end?

stop wasting your time with those pricks in our math class. i'm the only person there who actually wants to be your friend and you've yet to approach me. what a joke.

i wish you knew how much you truly mean to me. my feelings are so strong for you because of the way that i laugh when i am with you, the way you always check to see how i am doing, and how safe and loved you make me feel. i hope that there is a day where we can maybe try, but until then i can only be so grateful for you giving me one of the best friendships i've ever had.

There are 100 reminders of you in my life and although our chapter has ended, I'm not sure if I can handle another one.

u have been my bsf since childhood. idk why it's taken me 13 years to figure out i like u. but ur in a relationship. too late ig