Your concerns are 100% understandable and I don’t want you to feel stress. When you’re sad I feel sad.. I have so much to say but to be honest, I can’t even formulate the words right now. I’m just too exhausted and my brain won’t work properly from this dumb crap.

what do you want? Just say it! I have no idea why you’re being this way. I want to understand but I can’t because we don’t communicate. You expect me to decipher your mind. That’s what makes me believe you’re not mature enough for me. It’s heart breaking to say that, but I don’t know what else to think liesl. Yet when I’m around you you’re so damn mature and hard working and you push yourself through the day no matter what you’re going through. You dress well and you deal with mean jerks all day with grace. I just don’t get it? Maybe I’m out of touch.. I hate this feeling of confusion and I hate questioning myself. I just want to talk.. it’s not much to ask. I feel I’m not being listened to when I can’t be anymore clear and open on my end. If I played the same way as you, and made you have to guess what I was thinking you would get what I’m feeling.. I share everything and in return I have to read your thoughts. Please Liesl.. I’m willing to meet you half way and then all the way from there. Love is a two way street and we all have needs. Let’s work it out so we don’t have this disfunction anymore.

I swear I said I would never end up like my parents and I’m not going to start now. I want a healthy relationship. The thing that scares me most is investing time with someone for years, having kids just to separate and have my kids end up like I did growing up. Parents that feuded and fought over their kids. I was a troubled kid because of it.. brainwashed from garbage rap music. I had so much resentment and anger at the world because of it. And an ego to match. There are reasons why I am me and why I left a lot of things behind. I feel you misunderstand this part of me.

I can’t believe you didn’t know.. I don’t even know what to say. Not going to lie, I’m beyond disappointed, but it’s on me. I should’ve known.

You’re young and you don’t really know what you want in life. You’re still figuring things out and you probably have fomo. It is what it is..

I’m really not okay, but it is what is. This turned into a complete disaster. I don’t even know what to say.. I want to leave this life behind. Leave and never look back. Maybe I’ll move to the west coast when this stuff ends. I’ve been thinking about it for a while now.. It might take some time to get over you, but I’ve been through worse situations. I do really love you and it’s sad we never got a real chance.

You’re seriously the only girl I want in my life and I’m dead ass about that, but I understand your decision. It might take some time for me to feel better.. I’ll keep your present in case one day I see you again. It was just a few gft cards.

Ps. thanks for not ghosting me. You’re sweet for that..

my numbrs on my profile if you want to talk, but I don’t think you do. I love you with all my heart and soul. I wish you were here or I was there with you. God I do.. sorry for everything.

You’re probably mad at me and think I’m some asshole. You’re the only girl I want and I would do anything to make it happen, just for you, but it’s not that simple now. Tell me what you want me to do and I will do it, but I’m not going back THERE. Now I’m stuck in between making you feel comfortable and trying to make it happen. I need your help here. We don’t need to waste another day..

There’s too many people with my name so I don’t know if you write here. I’m sorry if I did anything to scare you and I’m sorry if I mixed things up.

I didn’t want you to feel anxiety so I tried to be up front and expressive and I feel it only made things worse...

If I’m wrong you have every right to bust my balls over it. We may not be on the same page and I tried to avoid this but...

Hey btw getting over you really sucks. Hope ur doing ok u deserve it. it gets better. pinky promise.

I’m sorry it ended like it did. But I hope that by now you know how wrong you were

I should’ve told you it was hurting me instead of keeping quiet. I was scared to lose you.