Unsent messages to JJ

you were just like the rest of them

it’s so hard to read you and i overthink.

I finally found that black notebook

u best link up w me soon

I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you when you needed me

I wish we had more than one summer to spend together

i wish i didn’t still love you

I fell in love with you so rapidly... you're too good. ♡

I wish u knew that I liked u:(

Your smile will always be the prettiest thing I’ve ever seen.

Im always gonna love you a little, i’ll try to not let it get in the way of our friendship again though

I love you more than words can describe, but I fucked it up. I’m sorry. I love you I do. I’m sorry. I miss you.

I don't understand how someone can fall out of love with someone they once promised their life too. you hurt me.

I realize now you weren't really in love with me, just the idea of having a girlfriend. I was the idiot who fell for your plastic love.

i never thought i would have to get over you. i did at some point mean what i said about you being the last person i dated. now? not anymore.

i am glad you found something that gave you more purpose. please remember its okay to not be perfect. No one will think less of you. Your human, dont forget emotions exist aha. But in all honestly it is okay, and it will all be okay in the end.

you've changed, but understandably, your incredibly stronge i am in so very proud of you. Alana and I are cheering you on to the fullest. I am always here for you even when you feel alone. Love ya.

i finally understand what we meant to each other. thank you for loving me, but i hope i never see you again.

you’ve had a part of me since the 3rd grade. i’ve loved you for 8 years from a distance. i’m so incredibly dumb for thinking you’d ever feel the same. but i’m also so ready to move on. so pls stop going out of your way to put yourself back into my life everytime i try taking you out. you’ll always own a piece of my heart. it WAS up to you how you used it. now it’s up to me. good bye jj

i just want to tell you that i hope everything turns out alright for you. you’re a good person and the people that have you in their life is very lucky, and if i did something wrong to fuck anything up or disappointed you in some way i’m sorry. just remember how great you are and take care (:

i hope you realize one day why i spent all that time trying to convince myself that you were gonna stay

i miss you so much. how is your sister and mom doing? is she loving college? how’s your moms new boyfriend?

You were my first love but you hated me for no reason. You treated me like shit. Why? I didnt do anything to you. I wanna hate u but i physically cannot i love you too much.

i know we're not meant to last forever and i've known that from the beginning, but recently i've been scared of losing you. and at first the feeling was good, because i had never felt this much love and care for someone but then i realized what if the day i lose you is tomorrow or the next day. and i've been so blinded by the fear that i forgot how much maybe you do actually care. i've never loved someone as much as you, i've never shown someone so much love to another person. that why i'm so scared. i love you more than i've loved anyone outside of family. you're my favorite person and one of the only people i have. please don't leave.

i still love you and i’m afraid that i always will. i wish you could have just told me what went wrong.

i hate you. i know you never did-did anything to me but you tried to. i was so fucking scared of you. you ruined me. i was fucking 12. and then to try and get to my sister? they told me they interviewed you. i hope you get what you deserve you sick fucking dickhead and i hope that i never have to hear from you again

Yeh the grass no longer reminds me of you. My only regret is not being able to break your heart the way you broke mine, you lying piece of shit. I hope you never treat a girl the way you treated me, what you did was not okay, and it hurts me. But I dont miss you, I hate you. ml Z

I’m sorry I wasn’t strong enough to hold onto our relationship. You deserve so much better. I love you.

I believe that we weren´t destined to be together. It wasn´t our time and it´ll never be because I´m finally letting go of the one memory I had of you. I wish you well j.

i hope that whatever version of me i become, you will accept me still. because i'd do the same for you. ily.

I really like you, and every time I see you my heart skips a beat. I know we dont talk but i can feel like I've known you for eternity.

I was obsessed with you, to the point where I couldn't go a week without thinking about you. Don't take this as a compliment, because I regret having had a crush on you. You unknowingly taught me why they use the word "crush" to describe infatuation like this. It's been a year since I've seen you in person, but it pains me to say that my feelings would come back in a heartbeat if I ever got the chance to see you again.

i’ve liked you for 2 years. everytime i try to like someone else it always comes back to you. you helped me so much but you never realized it. i told you everything. i told you things my bestfriend doesn’t know about me. but you left me stranded you left me sitting here waiting. You went on to liking my bestfriend and that hurt. You called me names and very bad things but it’s just because you were showing off. I never said anything about you and everyone who makes jokes i sit there and laugh. What do I do? I cant sit here forever waiting for you to change your mind one day. I need to move one and accept the fact we won’t work out. Thank you for everything- love your least favorite person

hii, its been over a year and we've been through a whole lot. You're still on my mind all the time but the memories we shared no longer make me sad, it makes me happy knowing I have shared all of them with you. I don't miss you, but I miss us and how we were. I've moved on but I can't say I let you go cos that would be a lie. Letting you go would mean knowing you're a stranger to my mind and I refuse to let that happen because it is you that made me the happiest I've ever been. I haven't experienced what I experienced with you ever since but I'm no longer waiting for you, I know that one day we will be because what we had was real.
I'll see you soon:)

I thought we actually had a bond nobody could ruin. But you made one girl ruin it just because you've known her for 4 years. 6 months of trying my best to keep you in my life, to make you happy, but I was just one of those people you used to get over her. You promised me there weren't anyone else. That I was the only girl. Why didn't you tell me the reason why you left. You left me in pieces wondering where I went wrong. Months of trying to figure things out, wishing we could still be together, wishing for a second chance. You left me figuring out myself that you were just using me to forget about your ex. Wasn't 6 months not enough rather than 4 years. I made you feel what she made you feel for just 6 months but you still wanted her. 4 years doesn't mean anything when she left you. I was there for you when she wasn't. I kept you company. I checked up on you when my world was falling apart and you didn't even bother asking about mine. But now you're gone. I was afraid this time would come. I'm still hoping and wishing you were still here with me as you promised. You felt it too, I know you did, but you still picked her and I'm still in confusion. Please come back I need you by my side. I'll forever love you bum as I promised, I won't leave.

Im so sorry for what i had put you through i love u sm everytime we hang out it makes me realise how much i actually love you just looking into your blue eyes and ur weird laugh that makes me laugh and when we will walk to class alone make me jjust know how much i lost i hope one day u forgive me i love u

I've liked u on and off since i first met u almost 2 years ago. i'm too scared to say anything bc i know u still like cara but i hope you know i like u a lot a lot.

hi my love, i miss you so much, you were my first love, the only person i trusted i miss what we had. we were so young yet so in love, i couldn’t stay away from you. you were the only thing keeping me here, i stayed because of you, i strived to be a better person because of you. there wasn’t a day i spent not thinking about you, you gave me such joy and made me feel loved when i had felt nothing at all. maybe one day we’ll cross paths again. i love you

i miss you a lot and i haven't missed you in a long time but I hope that maybe you miss me. you hurt me in ways that I couldn't explain and I would sit for hours waiting for the phone to ring for maybe a call or a text but you never came around I see you and its like we were never separated then you kissed me and I had no idea how I was supposed to feel because that had never happened before but now we are back to where we started and I might see you again soon and idk what to do because on one hand I want to love you and I want you to love me but then I don know if you want the same.

hi lol, this is kinda weird because i dont even know you like that. but when you don't talk to me it hurts. i don't blame you, i get attached easily. you made me feel warm. it felt nice while it lasted. i knew this was going to happen. i just knew it. it's funny cause i don't even know your actual name yet here i am crying for you. it's just that i never get shown love, you gave me affection and made me feel wanted in a way. but now that's all gone. you have no idea how many times you made me smile through my phone. you told me things other guys never mentioned before. you liked my beauty makrs. you found them pretty on me. you actually repected me. who ever steals your heart will be very lucky.

I know that I can be mean and take jokes to far but I genuinely want to include you in everything the group does. It doesn’t feel right if I don’t, even if we aren’t friends in your standards.

My feelings matter. But to you they don’t. Your feelings always came first. In every situation. I can’t.

I hurt you again. I want everything to be okay but I can’t try anymore. I did all I could to give you reassurance. This is a grey love.

I miss you dearly and hope that one day we'll find our ways back to each other, it's been 3 years I think now and you cross my mind every day, u mean so so much. I bet you don't even think about me anymore :/ I'm okay with that i guess. you may have just been a summer fling but there was something about u thats stuck with me for so so long. I could never seem to get u out of my head. I'll see you soon (i hope) lots of love, n

I’m sorry for hurting you. I wasn’t at my best. I put you in a place I said I could never put you. Forgive me.

I’m hurt by the past. I don’t know I can move on just yet. Us being together is the best but the worse still pulls me.

Im doing fine without you. i’m talking to so many other guys that i’m fine and all i want is for you to see all the guys im talking to and for you to be so jelous... but see that’s the problem. i shouldn’t want you to be jelous i shouldn’t want you to want me but it’s like i can’t let you go and i can’t be with you but the thought of you with someone else breaks me.

you bring it up all the time! saying that there could of been an “us” making it seem like my fault, but i distanced myself to give you your space to work for your family, and why? because i care, but you don't know that because sure you never liked me in that way anyway, after all that happening, me being your first kiss. But to you it means nothing!

you chose her. After everything. Why? I let myself believe you loved me. You promised you would stay. You left
Why ?

Jeg savner deg så uendelig mye. Du var mitt alt og gjorde meg til en bedre person. Takk for alt, det fineste mennesket på jord. Håper vi møtes snart igjen i et nytt kapittel.