you left... i don’t think you are gonna come back. i miss you, i barely even knew you. i didn’t know what you sounded like i had never seen you in real life but you made me happy. you cared

I loved you so much and I would do anything for you but you wouldn’t do the same for me. I really thought we were meant to be.

fuck you really hurt me. you made me believe you loved me. you knew how hard it was for me to trust and open up. you told me you would never hurt me. yet you did the exact thing I told you would hurt the most.
why? why couldn't you just leave me alone? why did you do that to me?
ik I'm just another name on your list, but you knew how much u meant to me, and you made me believe you felt the same way.
was it all a lie? when we hung out together every single day for hours? when you said I'm your favourite person?
was it all just a lie to take my virginity? ig it worked.
how could you do that? you knew how insecure and scared I was ab loosing it and letting a man see my body like that after my past, and yet you took it and left. you made me believe we were doing better than ever, you kissed me goodbye and after that you acted like I never meant anything. like what we had was nothing. you said that we could be friends, and off I said yes bc I can't stand the thought of loosing you, but it fucking hurts. going from being in love and together to barley talking and only seeing each other when I buy from you.
you fucking suck.
the worst part is that you'll never know how bad of a person you are and how much u hurt me bc I will never tell you. bc every time I did you looked at me like I was an annoying kid, and you acted like I was crazy and childish.
I was always scared that you'd stop liking me bc I'm younger and more immature so I stopped telling you when you hurt me. bc I didn't wanna loose you for being to childish for you.
and as much as I hate you I can't loose you. so I won't say anything. but I hope you get hurt like I did. I hope someone uses you and makes you question your worth, I hope you give up on love. bc that's what you did to me.
fucking hell you're a fucking loser, you're 20 and unemployed, you don't go to school, you live at home, youre short. I'm doing more w my life and I'm 16. fuck you fr you hurt me so much.
but "you didn't plan to fuck me you just got too horny" so its fine right? I never even said yes.... you just did it.
J

i miss you so much. i don’t understand how a person can exist one day and then just as suddenly... not. i remember all of our conversations in high school about how you were going to grow up and make a woman so happy, and it pains me to know i’ll never get to see that happen. i wish i had accepted your spam request. i wish i had seen those posts while you were still writing them and told you how much you mattered to me. i wish i hadn’t distanced myself from our friendship after the eddie thing, but you were his friend first and i felt like i was protecting you from feeling stuck, like you were with the whole alex situation. you were one of the best men i ever knew- i wish i had told you that. i wish i could hug you. i wish i could talk to you, not a stone on top of a box that used to be you. i wish i never knew what this kind of pain was like. i miss you so much and i think i will forever. i don’t think i’ll ever be able to be okay on the second of the month, i don’t think i’ll ever be able to see the american flag the same way. i love you, g. i hope paradise is being good to you.

I'm sorry. We were children and we were both at fault. I think about how different life could've been if never met, or if we met later in life. I hope you are in Costa Rica or San Diego and you left the east coast for good.

i dont know what happened. all i know is being friends with you made me the happiest ive ever been. i know we probably cant come back to that now but i just want you to know that you mean a lot to me. you deserve so much more than this world and sometimes i'd like to think you deserve me but you really dont, and i definitely know u dont want to deal w how complicated and messy i am. i hope things with ur gf goes well, shes really great. i love you gino.

tell me you felt something

I think about what we lost almost every day. Forever sorry. I wish I could hate you.

I cant love anybody else,I still love you and my love for you takes away from everybody else.

i don't know if youre being real with me. you're confusing but i want you.

Last night I dreamed about you and you looked so radiant. I miss you, I think I always will.

i can’t see you after what you did

im so sorry i couldn't reciprocate your feelings, i was feeling scared and insecure, i love you.

I love you gino, why can’t you love me the same.

to the first boy who lit me a flame, does your heart still remember my name?

We could’ve been something a lot more. But I’m not over my ex, ur not over urs, and u have a gf

Not a day goes by where I don’t think about you. I’m sorry, and I still love you despite everything

i want to move on, but i’ll always love you.

I don't know why I'm having a hard time moving on from you when there was never an us.

You will forever be my favorite person. I love you

come back bae

Do you even love me like how I love you?

why would you say that about me… i wouldve never said that about you, i wish i didnt love you

I miss you. I tell my friends I’m over you but the truth is I am not. I wish we worked things out.

i tell people im over u but i lie, ik it was barely anything but it was never nothing

Sorry I was a mess our whole relationship. I'll always love you, and I'm sorry for everything.

I don’t understand if you have feelings for me. Are we just friends, or are we something more?

i love you. you brought my spark back. you make me not hate myself. i’ll forever love you

i hate that i fell in love with you, we’re supposed to be friends but I can’t help but stare.

i never got over you as i said. i still think of you every single day, i hope that someday i hug u.

2 years later and im still not completely over you. ill always wonder what changed.