It's been 2 years since you hurt me. I never told you but that night I found out what you did, I couldn't sleep next to you, it felt like sleeping next to a snake, so I went outside and sat on the beach till the sun started rising and I whatched as the fisherman started reeling in their daily catch. Judine, I don't think you'll ever understand how much you hurt me, sitter there on the cold beach I felt empty. I wasn't angry, I wasn't sad, I didn't cry, I didn't scream, I didn't speak, I couldn't even bring myself to actually think, I just sat there with a blank mind through the night. I felt broken. When I read all the lies you told him, I could literally feel my heart shatter, and till this day it will be the most pain I'll ever feel.
When I confronted you about it, you said you were sorry and that things whould change. But you made it worse. You spread rumours and turned every single friend againt me, and you kept taking to him... All the while stil being my best friend.

A piece of me died that night, that I could never regain so I tried to fill it with other things... Guess you can kinda say I lost my childhood too. My depression got to a point where I could get out of bed anymore. I can't truly trust anyone anymore, I can't truly get close to anyone, I always push away before they can do that to me. You did not only turn my friends against me at school, but there at the beach, those friends I've known since I was 2. For many of them that was their last year there, because many of them graduated. But it's not your fault, I was too dependent on you and I fell apart.

Before any of this even happened you made me choose between you and L, I chose you because you were my best friend and i believed you when you said that L was trying to turn me against you, that when L begged and pleaded that I should listen to her and that you were manipulative... That she was just jealous of our friendship. You promised me that we'll stay friends.

You truly were my first best friend and we have so many happy memories together. I just want to know that I've forgiven you and I hope you never ever have to feek that type of pain.

Judine just please don't hurt anymore people, you did exactly the same thing to K, you hurt her SO MUCH that she had to leave school, you tear apart Clau and Z, please please please I beg of you that you won't hurt the people you are close to now because they are such kind hearted people.

If by some miracle you read this, and it is you (because this is probably the only entry with your name because it's so unique) I hope you are doing well and truly have changed for the beter as some say.
x x Thanks for the memories Eugene