Unsent messages to JOHNNY

I like you but I don’t think you like me back. But you kept staring at me and smiling so idk what that means.

we held hands while watching coco once and since then that is the one movie that can put me to sleep.

i should’ve gotten back together with you when you asked. even if it didn’t work out i wanted to know were we went wrong the first time.

you should be here. i wish we would’ve worked out and although it’s been almost two years i never stopped loving you.

it’s a different type of love with you. almost like an ever growing one. i want you to want me the way i want u.

i love you and i constantly think of you. i know you don’t feel the same but that doesn’t make me love you or miss you any less.

i'd like to think that in a parallel universe we could be together. it helps me cope with never having you

i feel like im gonna fucking die if i dont get this out- i hope you know how much i love and appreciate you.

When I think of who hurt me I think of you and when you do you think of her. Dont pass the pain
on. We could have been good together.

you hurt me more than anyone. you are the reason i am numb. you promised to love me and my family no matter what but you still left and broke everything inside not only me but my mother. you will never EVER know what it feels like to tell your younger sibling how their father will never return again. you were once a father to me but your nothing but a nobody. you may not have been my biological father but i considered you as my father and now your nothing. i hope your happy with yourself and how your life is going.

u absolutely broke me and brought me to one of lowest places in my life. but i honestly hope you’re doing fine.

$300 a month for rent is stupid and i’m sorry you live in a shitty place but seeing you today was amazing

How could you leave us like that. You had so much to live for. So much love in your life. God I am devastated.

I don’t think you realized how many people you’d hurt when you left. Perhaps you didn’t care. That hurts the most.

I really like you. But you'll never know because I don't know how to tell you...you just make me so happy.

Sos una persona maravillosa, estoy seguro de que llegarás a hacer cosas maravillosas dejando tu huella en el mundo y deslumbrando con tu ingenio

I'll always have a piece of you in my heart. I know we're only friends but I'll always love you like I once did.

i wish i never messed up our friendship by you knowing my feelings. i was always afraid you would talk about me the way you talk about all the other people you dislike, turns out i heard you are talking about me that way now. im so sorry i really hope you know that but just because your upset over a little problem doesnt mean you have to ruin my reputation.

hey, i dont think you know how many times i think about the perfect conversation with you. Whenever i want to text you i always hesitate and end up not doing it, i guess i'm just scared ill come out as annoying if i keep on talking too much. I realized that we talk better if there's a "break" shall i say, i'm always scared of talking too much and running out of things to talk haha. Anyways, johnny, i hope you know that i really like you, a lot. I don't think you see me that way though... You know how us these days are just straight up horny and seek a significant other for sexual desires or something like that? And how when you like someone you think they're hot or you want that desires? Well all i really wish i could just hug you and bury my head in your chest listening to music, it's all im asking for really. But i know if you would EVER like me, it would be a different type if that make sense. It makes my heart aches a little but it's okay. i miss you Johnny. even though we just talked a few hours ago. I really hope you see this one day hahha..idk how you'll react to it though. I like you a lot, sleep early tonight too okay you need it, not too early though i still want to talk to you.

I miss you, but it was really for the best. I spiraled for a while after we broke up and I'm better now. YOU'RE better now. You would be proud of me like how I'm proud of you. I've seen what you've done and I've heard of what you've done. I'm trying, but I still think of you every now and then. I wish I could tell you everything, but I'm scared of what to say to you. I'm scared of what we had. But I loved it all at the same time because it was you and us. You were my home. I told you everything. I find myself reaching out to you whenever anything happens only to find you not there. I'll always have love for you and I hope we can reconnect. I'm moving on.

for what it's worth i hope it was us from the start. i hope u meant everything u said since it made me fall in love with u.

look , it hurts because i thought you were the one. knowing you might not be .. that shit is breaking me.

i'm sorry i loved you more than i loved myself. i'm sorry you didn't show enough to care about me. i'm sorry you lost me.

hey so sorry i didn't talk to you. i was always super nervous.
-think back to 7th grade and you'll know lol

I know you have someone else on your mind, but it's okay I'm an idiot for liking you anyway..my feelings will go away someday right?

I hate it so much that you are so far away. I wish we live closer somehow, that way I might have a chance with you...

I don't know what your fav color is so I'm just gonna choose this. Anyway, I can't stop thinking about you and it makes me smile everytime, but I know you're to far away and you have someone else on your mind already..it's okay I'll continue to like you until my feelings go away some day...

I really don't know if I love you or not but all I can think about for the past 4 months is talking to you. I hate that you're so far away.

It’s not that we weren’t doing great. You were , I wasn’t and I made you feel like you weren’t either.

i read our messages. everyday. everyday since u last left me on read. everyday i feel so alone, i look back at how safe u made me feel. how u instantly knew when something was wrong. where did i go wrong? i tried showing u how i felt but u never quite understood. u found me when i was at my lowest, and i rlly miss talking to you. fuck the things i would do too be able to text u, and let everything out. to feel so worthy of love again. u made me feel at home, when my home wasn’t safe. u’ll never see this, bc u always questioned what u meant too me, so you’d never guess this is me writing this, but if somehow u see this. i miss u. sm. u don’t understand the way my heart aches re-reading our texts. when u would spam me as i fell asleep early, wake me up making sure i slept okay, making sure i ate. i miss u johnny.

i don’t know what i did wrong. i wish u would text me, i miss u more than u think. i just wanted to let u know that i love u, and i wish i would’ve told u that the last time we talked but i didn’t think it would be. i wish u nothing but the best and i hope u go to LA with a person that u love.

i don’t know what i did wrong. i wish u would text me, i miss u more than u think. i just wanted to let u know that i love u, and i wish i would’ve told u that the last time we talked but i didn’t think it would be. i wish u nothing but the best and i hope u go to LA with a person that u love.

everyone thinks it’s stupid that i still love you like i do but i can’t help it. you saved my life and i miss u

hola! soy yo otra vez, si, la chica tan pesada que esta obsesionada con tus rizos, tan perfectos ahhh dios que bien desahogarse para poder respirar mejor porque la verdad creo que me estaba ahogando por no decirte nada, la verdad es que no podría porque me pones nerviosa. Hace días que no como ni duermo porque la ansiedad puede conmigo, la verdad es que no es por tu culpa sino de la maldita física, me han dicho que se te da bien, a lo mejor, algún día, puedas enseñarme.
Hoy te he vito en el pasillo, Marta Sanz sabe que me gustas pero la he dicho que no haga nada porque me da miedo que hables conmigo y que la cague y pienses que soy una rarita, aunque si ves esto, que espero sinceramente que si, quizá pienses que lo sea.
solo una cosa mas, te ves muuuuuy guapo por los pasillos paseando con Alex Lavin y el resto de tus amigos. Sinceramente espero que tal vez algún día tu te fijes en mi y, por lo menos, seamos amigos.
Paula

Hola Johnny, se que nunca leerás este pero necesito desahogarme, soy Paula, Paula Farto y te quiero desde primero de la eso, se que nunca me has visto como nada y si ha sido así, soy lo suficientemente tonta para no decírtelo, la verdad es q me gustan mucho tus rizos, tan rubitos y perfectos y q ya seas mas alto que yo, la verdad es que nunca he sentido algo así por nadie pero tu haces que en mi estomago hayan mariposas, creerás que es una broma pero no es así, la verdad es que llevo soplando las velas de mi cumpleaños durante tres años pidiendo el mismo deseo, que algún día podamos estar juntos, se que nunca leerás esta carta pero no creo que sea capaz de decírtelo a la cara,
Te quiero, te quiero mucho,
Paula

I know you'll never see this, nor will you ever care but I really loved you. I really wanted you for longest time but I now realize that there are bigger things in life than you. I think about you every day and I sometimes wish I could go back to how things used to be. Just to feel it for a little bit. It took a lot to stop loving you and you'll always have a place in my heart, but you no longer have my whole heart.

I never realized how much I loved you until you were gone. i was young and foolish. maybe, someday, we can make it back to each other. xo

you don't know that i like you and i don't know how to tell you. maybe one day i'll have the courage, i'm sorry that i can't tell you. i so badly don't want to get broken. L X

I wish we could have been more. You always made me laugh and it honestly always made my day. I felt like we were meant to know each other.

u r the only thing bringing me happiness these days & u dont know how much i appreciate u but i really really do :')

I still love you. I miss you I feel so alone without you but I’m still mad but I need you in my life.

I miss you. I didn’t know if you liked me or not but i loved you. i still get butterflies thinking about you. you probably forgot about me but i won’t forget you.

I miss you. I didn’t know if you liked me or not but i loved you. i still get butterflies thinking about you. you probably forgot about me but i won’t forget you.

i love you so much, please stay strong. youre so much better than people say you are. i love you and im proud of you.

but look johnny! i’m finally writing back! isn’t that enough for you? please come back. i need you. i can’t do this without you.

im sorry for what i did. im starting to forgive myself and im trying to become a better person. i hope you will forgive me too, i miss you. wish you the best in life and maybe i could be apart of it again soon

u made me feel like that one moment when youre driving in pouring rain and u go under a bridge for a second

You're the best thing that's ever happened to me, and I'm forever grateful to have you in my life. um chile anyways... love ya

you were truly the first person I ever really fell for. I cared so much about you, and I miss you, but I know i’m better off without you. I wish you nothing but the best.

Sometimes I wonder why I wasn’t good enough for you. I changed everything about myself and I’m still not good enough for you