Unsent messages to JIMMY

i started wearing my seatbelt and looking when i crossed the road, but why did it have to go so wrong?

Every time I think about you I get this weird feeling. It's the feeling of being stuck between the knowledge that you hurt me the entire time we spoke, and the amount of care I had for you. I don't know how to feel honestly. The chaos of your existence put me in a situation where I thought it was my job to fix you. I miss the laughs, no one makes me feel as loved as you did. But I don't miss the hurt. I couldn't be responsible for you I just wasn't ready for that. You loved to say absence makes the heart grow fonder, but with you gone my heart doesn't want you as it did before. Without you, I learned how bad our relationship was and how much I lost myself. The only problem is I can't find myself anymore baby, I don't know where I am. Maybe you changed me? All I know is that I'm better off without you, but without you, I am lost.

i hope one day you come across this and know its for you. ive been in love with you since eighth grade. because of you i look forward to life

i've talked to you once in my life, but your smile in chemistry class when the teacher jokes is the highlight of my day

the song Loose Ends always reminds me of you. i wonder what would happen if i finally got the nerve to text you.

Dear Jimmy,
I tried so hard to make us work. I wanted to make you less sad and depressed, but in reality, the place that I pulled you out of, was the place that I went. I wish you were the same caring boy I knew over the phone, and not the cold and disinterested one in person. I will still always think of you because you were the first boy to make an impact on my life. Love, A