Unsent messages to EMERSON

I don't hate you and I don't regret meeting you I enjoy looking back on all of our memories and hopefully sometime when you're over me we can be friends.

I love you so much and I don't want to lose you. Please unblock me, if were not together I'd still like to stay in touch with you.

Okay, I'm done fighting for you; you obviously will believe whatever, and I can't change that. Like, Idk how more to make you believe that I don't like her. Imagine if I did the things you did if my snap score went up 165,000 in a day if I ft her or any other girl. Suppose I snapped at other girls while I was with you. Literally, ask anyone at my school like you can ask Ella I didn't talk to any like I didn't have an actual conversation with any of them.

IDK how to prove to you more that I don't like her. I can unadd her to get her off my BSF list like idc I will if you want but I just don't know why you don't trust me or believe what I'm saying.

Yeah, she rejected me... in the 8th grade that was so long ago and those feelings have gone away I told you that I wouldn't talk to her ever again, I kept my word you just have to trust me, and even before that I didn't have an actual conversation with her until you blocked me and I asked her to send you that paragraph she would just send streaks and I would leave her unopened, I have given you no reason to think that I like her why would I try so fucking hard to be with you if I wanted to be with her that makes no god damn sense. Like you facetime you ex your fucking ex and you have so many guy friends that you text on the daily why is it ok for you to test all these guys and I cant so much as to ask her where my teacher is because he didn't start the zoom call and I trust that nothing would happen and it didn't because I trust you I know that you'll never do that to me. Just have to trust me I am probably the most loyal guy you'll ever get.

I truly hope someday that we are ready to be together and I hope that our paths cross again someday. I already miss you so much. And if you see this know that I'll always love you and if you ever decide to come back to me I'll be here waiting.

I don't hate you I hate that we can't be together I hate that you don't trust me. I hate that you think I like her. I hate that you think I don't like you after all I've done for you.

You thought that I wanted to be with her. But in reality, all I ever wanted was to be with you and I thought I proved to you how much you meant to me but I guess I didn't show it enough.

Why, why do you always try to end things? I feel like I haven't done anything wrong I've tried so hard to make this work so fucking hard I haven't given up on you, and I know that I never will. I love you so much that you can try to end things a thousand times, and I'll still fight for you. Please just take me back, Emerson.

I still have hope that we can be together it hurts so much that you blocked me on everything like I am heartbroken I hate it so much that you don't trust me or can block me so easily and that you can talk to your ex and all these and I don't talk to my girl BSF because you told me how uncomfortable it made you and I did I stopped talking to her completely took her out of my life and you still end things even though I didn't do anything. Just know I will never give up on you I love you so much you have no idea the impact you have had on my life like you will always be in my memories and for the past month and a half I have not stopped thinking about you all I think about is the next thing we could do the next thing I could do to give you the relationship you deserve and please take me back.

We have not spoken in 3 months and even tho I drive by you all the time, the glances through car windows hurt. It makes me realize how much I lost and I'm having a hard time living with that. Anyways I hate car windows because I still love you and I know that you will never be able to love me ever again.

I’m so glad u were once a part of my life and I’m forever thankful for how much our friendship taught me. I love u and can’t wait to see the amazing things you’ll do.

i wish you didn't have to breakup with me because of religion #istillloveyouandiwannabreakupwithmybfandgetbackwithyou

But why? Tears are falling down my cheek, nightmare after nightmare. Everything doesn’t seem real at all. It’s like a faded dream in my mind and I can’t remember the details no matter how much I try. It’s like a fog. How could this happen to one person? How could everyone hurt me so much? I’m so terrified but I can’t even express that, I get attacked.

i was hesitant to dance with you because 1. i dont know how 2. it was intimate and i never had experienced that. thank you so much for asking me to dance with you. i hesitated but i was glad i accepted it. i remember you holding my hand and asking me if we could hold each other the way others did. we werent close. we didnt look each other in the eye. we had a short convo that ended up shocking me about a question you asked. i dont know how our hands broke off and we stopped danxing together. i hated how it ended. i hope in the future i could get another opportunity to do that with you.

Because if i knew, i wouldve danced longer with you. I wouldve looked into your eyes. I wouldve held your hand tighter. Now it might be my first and last but i hope there’s still a chance.

i remember you asking me a question at an event we were at together.... you lied to me or maybe you changed your mind. Oh how I wish to be heather. I wish I was her and I wish it was us.

you used to be the reason why i smiled, i laughed, i was happy, and all the other things being in love or whatever that feeling was meant to make one feel. Now I feel sad and cry whenever. Oh how time changes.