I’m drowning. I need you to help me but I can’t reach out to you, my heads telling me the worst things about myself and what to do and I don’t know how much longer I can ignore them.

I want the best for you and I know that I’m not the friend you deserve or should want but I really wish I was again cause fuck I miss you and I’m really struggling

you’re not my first love but i really have to get things off my chest. i’m in love with you, like, horribly in love with you. and it’s so weird because i once told myself at the end of my last relationship a few months ago when we were getting closer that i wouldn’t ever let myself have feelings for you lol. um, i’m kind of very upset? idk, i don’t think you’ll ever like me back and that really fucking sucks, because i like you more than i’ve ever liked anyone and so yeah...whatever though it’ll be fine. we can be best friends if that’s what you want

thank you.
i miss you.
i love you.
my life is agonizingly torturous without you.
you were everything to me.
I hope he loves you as much as i do.
you deserve nothing but love and happiness.
-Jay, formerly known as JR.

hey this is part 2 sorry not sorry xoxo gossip gril
bro im so over life like fuck school and shit im so over it its just a bother to get up at 8am ish every fucking day like god damn, is sunday even a fucking this like can the weekend please be longer its uneven and makes me sad saugfuasgfiusegfiupsgefpiugsefpiugwefpiugwefipugwepifugeqwipuf god part 2 of a lot from ........

ur probably literally never gonna see this and i don’t think i even want you to but. even though you’ve probably changed i can’t bring myself to stop disliking you for what happened. it’s not like i even remember it that well i just remember what we had wasn’t that great and it was pretty toxic for me. i don’t know what i’m trying to say here but i guess i feel like i should write this because you were the first person that came into my head when i had the option to do this. so, “kitty,” what we had wasn’t great, but you know, it was fun while it lasted. i wouldn’t want you back now but i hope you’re doing well.
-“fishy”

im only writing this because i feel like i should since you were the first person that i thought of when i thought “first love.” i don’t know if what we had was love, and i know i wouldn’t go back and do it again, and i know i definitely don’t love you now. every time i see you i think of how much i dislike you because of what happened to us. i think of when you posted to your story covering up the whole thing. i think about the fact that you never said you loved me. i think about all that, even though megan says you’ve changed, i don’t think i can look at you in a positive way again because of that weird hell of a relationship we had. i was obsessed with you then, and you barely seemed to care. it’s fine though, i’m not mad at you for it, i just can’t force myself to forgive you. i wish i could. megan obviously could. and now she’s left me too. take care of her i guess.

You hurt me and a part of me will never forgive you for that. It seemed like you threw it all away so easily and that was so fucking shitty of you. And speaking of shitty you made me feel not like enough a lot and I thought that was just what relationships did.
I hope your future partners feel the same hurt I did

your curls, glasses, smile, laugh still make my heart flutter every time I see you. but you're not mine and I can never have u

Seeing you married, to a man, hurts in a way I cannot explain. I wonder if you ever think back on our sapphic love.

I know you don’t know it, but I would’ve killed myself if it wasn’t for you. Thank you for showing me the beauty of life and that I deserve to be loved.

I still think about you sometimes. Usually when something related to love happens in my life, my thoughts skip back to you. I'm at a point where I remember the good parts more than the bad but I still don't know if I could ever fully forgive you. I still miss you sometimes though

18 agonizing months, I waited for you. For nothing but pain. You're carrying his baby now. I was nothing to you but a cheap fuck and attention. Fuck, it hurts so bad.

hey! this is for J who keeps writing these to Courtney... are you okay? I keep sending messages. if you want to talk ill keep checking -from another Courtney

letting you go.
not because i want to, but because i need to. for my health, my sanity and my future. you're happy with him now, and your happiness is all that matters. i will always love you.
-Jay, formerly known as JR.

I miss the nights we spent together, the hours in each others company with the dulled sound from the screen between us. I opened up and you took advantage of that, now I'll never know who to trust with the deepest parts of myself.

I've only ever wanted to be with you. I think about you all the time. You make me the happiest I've ever been

It's 4 a.m. and I haven't slept for 3 days. I now know that I shouldn't have held on to someone that wasn't holding on to me. I truly love you, and that means that I need to let you live your life. Even if your life and mine are very different.

I care about you more than I’ve ever cared about someone. I love you so much and God I wish I could tell you that.

No matter what happens. I will always choose you. Always and forever <3

The older i get the less i desire and the things i desire i cant live without

I love u and wish I knew how to tell u but im scared you wont feel the same because of the past.

I wish you would text me how you truly feel

i liked you. u made me bi. i didnt tell bc i didnt want to lose you, but turns out i lost you anyway

I miss you chick.

I love you but please stay away from me. I love you too much

I wanted us too. I wish it had worked out. I hope youre doing well now and are happy.

My August

i didn't mean for our last words to be in anger, i'm sorry

why did you do that to me?

Why did you tell me that you still love me, just to ghost me, again? What did I do to deserve that?

Come home please. The void is to vast. I need you

I waited for you to come back. I thought you had. I was foolish to believe that you still loved me.

It was so meaningful to me to see you again for a while. Its good to see you happy

It’s your bday soon and I won’t ever speak to you again but I will always wish the best for you. ????

I miss my best friend, and I’m sorry for whatever I did that made you want nothing to do with me.

I really want to catch up, but it'd ruin years of me trying to move on. I doubt you'd want to either

I miss you 2 years later, I hope your happy.

i'm just a train ride away!!

I miss that smile. Glad I got to see you still have it with him.

Passion and purpose does not always align. I just want to see you happy and successful

i have to keep my distance for the sake of losing these feelings I should not have. You'd understand

i hope we work out, ill always love you baby

I’m sorry

I miss you so much but ik I mean nothing to you

i am deeply in love with you

I missed that smile. Glad to see you still have it with him.

Im done my love. maybe in another life you’ll change before i was too tired. <3

im sorry i can’t give you the love you deserve

When I said I like you, I didn't mean it as a friend.