This could be the last time that we're gonna fall in love. It could be the last time of making it up.

We'll call it a night, and we go to bed. And think about how we're happy instead, of being apart-- the way it should be.

Masakit kasi ang bilis eh. Huling "I love you" na pala natin. Huling halik. Huling yakap. Hindi ko manlang nalamlaman.

I'M SO SORRY. I WISH I DANCED WITH YOU AT HOMECOMING. I WISH I NEVER SAID "I LOVE YOU" IN A WEIRD, AWKWARD VOICE. I WISH I HELD YOUR HAND MORE OFTEN. I WISH I SHOWED YOU OFF MORE OFTEN. I WISH I SHOWED YOU MORE OF MY FAVORITE THINGS. I WISH I COULD TURN BACK TIME.

I wish I lived with you so I made sure you're eating well everyday. Well, I wish I knew how to cook for you.

I still wanna be your favorite girl. I wanna be the one who makes your day. The one you think about as you lie awake.

Yung nakakasakit sa puso ko ay yung never na kita mayayakap sa dibdib ko habang nanonood tayo ng pelikula.

I'm sorry I couldn't tell my mom about you.

She loves you though. And she still thinks you're gwapo.

Two years is longer than you and I thought we'd ever get with anyone. I will never forget the heart-shaped cookies. I hope it's true that the first few weeks of us being together will always hold a special place in your heart.

Hey, remember how you borrow my Spanish book? I give it to you as soon as we get out of 1st period because ours were literally right next to each other. I put a neon pink sticky note in mine, just for you. Today, I went and dug up a note that you gave me. "Have a great day and keep your chin up ♡" I'm keeping it under my pillow, along with a card that has a drawing of a rocket on it and it says "I love you to the moon and back." I'm keeping it to make me smile, and remind me of love. Your love. Even if you ever stop, but I doubt that you will. Mahal kita.

"No I just don't wanna make promises I can't be sure I can keep" and after everything you would ask me about nonstop.

I regret all our arguments now. I'm really sorry. I realize that now. I'm sorry. I'm not saying this to get back with you. I just realize how stupid I was now. I'm really really sorry. I'd tell you but you'd just ignore me anyway.

Did that video apply to me? Did you sit down and think about wanting a life with me? Did I challenge you? What changed?

I am so hurt because I'm so confused. I don't understand how all that can change in a few minutes. How could you be making promises about being with me just a few hours before all that? How could YOU throw it all away like that? You were the one who believed from the beginning.

I Still Love you, but your stubbornness makes me So ANGRY. And you wouldn't even give a proper apology for accusing me of blackmail. Because you don't care. You think your point goes over MY head??? My point goes over YOUR head. I guess... I guess we will never truly understand each other. We're just too stubborn to listen. And you say we have nothing in common. So now tell me, what's the real reason that you don't want me to hate you?

I'm rewatching it so I could feel like I'm not good enough. But all it told me was that it did apply to me. You told me all of those. But I was always beautiful in your eyes.

By the way, I had this bad idea to put the note you wrote me in my phone case. I didn't like any of the polaroids we took, but I don't know why I only thought of this now, when you're not mine anymore.

Not about you, I just wanna rant. You didn't make me depressed and hopeless. You made me heartbroken. But that heartbrokenness made me realize how no one talks to me, which caused me to feel hopeless and depressed. It's not your fault. I just... don't know how to deal with this. Just tell me that you love me. Maybe you don't need to. Your actions tell me otherwise.

I wish I didn't speak when you asked me which of K's rocks looked the prettiest so I have one last thing to remember you by.

I'M REALLY REALLY SORRY I COULDN'T EVEN GIVE YOU THE BARE MINIMUM. I'M SO SORRY I BROKE THE CONTRACT. IF ONLY I HAD IT WITH ME EVERYDAY. Fuck. I really wish I did. One thing I know is, I'll never break the last one.

In my own little world, you still want to be with me. I'll just pretend everything is fine. I'll just pretend that you're still mine. I'll just create another you. He'll have all your qualities, the only difference is that he still loves me. I'll just live in delusion from now on.

I learned that nothing lasts forever when I was only 11.


That's why I was a nonbeliever when we got together. I knew that already, but if I did then why does it hurt so fucking much?

I never understood why bitter people were the way that they were. But now that I'm hurt, every wholesome meme, every couple that I see, every happy person that I see, hurts me. I wish I could send them to you. I wish I can tell you about them. I wish we were still like them. I miss you.

I was never a bitter person. I was just edgy, not bitter.


I'll try not to take my pain (forgot that word existed lmfao) out on everyone else. I let the people who do that affect me and our relationship.

I love every single bit of you. Thank you for showing me yourself. Your true self. Your naked body. Your nerdy self. Your vulnerable self. You. I will always love all of you.

Goodnight. I always waited until you went to sleep because that was our routine. You slept at 9. This virus fucked everything up. I'm sorry. And I'm glad you biked here at 5 am. Please take care of yourself. I need you. I love you.

I know that you left me because I wasn't everything that you wanted. I was almost. I wish I was perfect for you.

Your "sorry it wasn't blackmail" was so half-assed that's why it doesn't count bitch. You refuse to even do it properly. What the fuck is wrong with you I'm just asking you to take care of yourself

It was also Thursday that I looked forward to every single week. It was the day where I had 2 classes with you. It was the day I got you alone to myself.

I was so confident we'd last forever because we got through everything... and I started out not believing in us because I wanted to be realistic. I never should have turned to my fantasies.

LMFAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO YOURE LITERALLY MORE UPSET ABOUT THE CAPITOL GETTING RAIDED TODAY BYE IM OVER YOU

I'm so sorry for letting what people might or might not even have thought of me affect our relationship.

I just want to be with you. I want to hold you. I want to hold your cheeks. I want to hug and smell you first thing in the morning. I want to wake up to you.

I don't want to lose you. I am so scared of you finding someone better. You used to be the one who told me all of these things. But I would never leave you. You were more than enough for me.

I was free all the time but you weren't. I always waited for you to be. I'm sorry. I just didn't want to bother you. I'll do better now.

Remember when we held hands the entire time during the first play that we watched? Remember when we sat in the back row to kiss during the second play that we watched?

I'm really really sorry I don't know how to be a good girlfriend I just. This is my first real relationship ok? I regret believing all those toxic stereotypes about how it's normal not talking to each other. And how it's always the guy's fault. I thought texting was enough for you. I always bugged you until you got on. It wasn't enough. I'm really sorry.

I AM LITERALLY SO DOWN TO COSPLAY WITH U AND IM NOT JUST SAYING THAT. DRESSING UP IS SO FUN EVEN THOUGH IM 16

I really wish I left you alone the first time because every single time I talked to you it backfired and I kept fucking everything up.

I miss every little part of your sensitive body. I was good at expressing affection that way (hugs, tickles, not sex lol). I thought we were going to turn out okay through this pandemic. But we didn't survive.

Mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita mahal kita MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL NA MAHAL. MAHAL KITA. ILANG BESES KO PA SASABIHIN SAYO? LAGI KITANG MAMAHALIN.

This is all my fucking fault I fucking deserve all this I'm sorry I'm really, really sorry this is all my fault

Sorry. I was annoyed because you say "yeah I'm fine" so I'll leave you alone but you're not sleeping, you didn't attend class today, and you literally told me how you're sick of everything. But then again, if you told me "I don't want to talk about it," I probably still would have bothered you.

The crying stopped! Yay! I don't cry every time I read your messages of "it's over" anymore!

But I don't know how long I'm gonna be unable to let you go for.

I still have hope.


Because I know how much you loved me.

I don't know how you're gonna get rid of me that easily, even if you hated me. You were always the clingier one. Which was the whole problem. I was tok afraid to be clingy and didn't show it enough.

I'm your first love, aren't I? And your best friend.

I wonder what kind of lies you tell yourself right now.

Like you know, "nope. This is the truth. This is what's happening right now," in your head maybe, but you know in your heart that it's not.

I know you're lying. We were literally fine A SECOND before it was brought up. You can't tell me "I stopped loving you as soon as we broke up." You were always the clingier one. I know you can't get rid of me that easy, even if you hated me. You can't just THROW AWAY TWO YEARS IN TWO DAYS AND BE FINE!

I'm so sorry. I really am. I don't know how many times I'm gonna say that. I promise I'll never do it again.

Yes. I would love to watch Star Wars with you before the Civil War begins. I just wanna hear you talk over the whole movie.

WOULD YOU HAVE HUNG OUT WITH ME IF I ASKED WHILE YOU WERE IN A GAMING TOURNAMENT??? I WANTED TO TALK TO YOU SO FUCKING BAD, BUT YOU WERE BUSY.