Unsent Messages

hey. i think it's time to let you go. we talked yesterday and you didn't ask for me back like you usually do after fights. so i know it's over. i was holding on to this idea of us speaking after weeks and saying how we can't live without each other and how we love each other to much to be apart. but that wasn't what happened... and it's not going to. i keep thinking back on the night you gave me that playlist you made me. you asked me to be your girlfriend that night. i remember listening to our song just smiling so incredibly big at my phone.. and then like you could read my mind you said you loved me. it was the perfect night. i fell asleep the happiest i have ever been. i remember you playing with my sister and she turned to me and says "hes a good one". she asked to play with you yesterday.. i had to explain to her that sometimes the person you love isn't always meant to be in your life forever. But i owe you so much. you made me believe that i could be loved. you made me feel like there was not anything wrong with me. you made me feel safe. i got butterflies just thinking of you. now when i think of you my heart aches. i remember you always said the right things. whenever we got into fights and i would think you stopped loving me you would say "don't think i don't love you please. because i do" it was like you could read my mind. if you could read my mind now you could never look at me the same. i am in so much pain. josh you.. i love you. i mean it with every fiber in me that i am so in love with you. remember that time you said " i mean its not even that i like you, its quite obvious im in love with you." i remember. but im not yours to love anymore. and your not mine. think of me whenever it rains okay? find me in the stars at night, find me in the pink sunrise. i love you. goodbye josh.