hi angel. im sad we never talk anymore. i miss it so much. school took over for me, and i kept getting in trouble for staying up so late, just to talk to you. did you know that i stayed up until 6 am to talk to you once? of course you didn't know, i played it off as if i did that everyday. at least, i tried to. i know you're going through some hard times right now, and i so wish i could be there for you. hug the life outta you and tell you that i'm here for you. i'm so confused right now haha before i met you it was just guys guys guys. but now, i don't even know. am i bi? sometimes i want to tell you how i'm feeling but sometimes i don't even know if it's worth it. what if you don't feel the same? what if i'm really just confused? fuck. why the fuck do you have to live so far away angel? right now, our conversations feel awkward and forced and i wish it wasn't like that. i can't imagine what you're going through and i have no clue how too make you feel better. it's driving me crazy. i know you have someone right now, which is part of the reason i can't confess what i'm feeling. you're in my head all the time, i can't stop thinking about you. when your name pops up on my home screen, i can barely wait to respond. i keep trying to convince myself that it's just because i've never met someone like you. i keep trying to think of more and more ways to make you laugh, but i think i'm being unsuccessful. also, if i did tell you, what would happen? we barely know each other, the real person behind the screen. both of us would have to either stay up late, or wake up early to even talk to one another. online relationships are so stupid. relationships are stupid in general, but i think i would try my hardest to make it work with you. ah what the fuck am i even saying. you have someone right now. did you know that i thought you were lying when you told me about him? yeah, i'm that selfish. i thought he was a fake story because, i don't even know, you wanted to make me jealous? i know, it's stupid and i should've never thought that. i'm sorry. i feel all of this shit but i can't decide on my life what to do with you.