Unsent Messages

alex, i will honestly never understand why you wouldn't give me a chance to love you. you kept me around for so long. i thought you weren't like everyone else, but how could you do that to me if you actually cared about me. i told you i didn't believe anyone could love me, that every relationship is going to turn bad. you told me to read some romantic novels, but why couldn't you have shown me what it feels like to be loved? you were the problem, i always apologised for getting upset, but you never apologised for making me upset. i would have done anything for you, for a year a half i lived my life for you. you consumed me. i wait all day for you to message me when you're ignoring me for hours. when my phone buzzes and i see your name my heart skips a beat, it still does. i get so excited to see what you have to say to me, but its never enthusiastic, its always a dry reply because you just don't care. i try so hard to keep the conversation going by saying something you can reply to. but i just don know how much more i can give you of myself, where did it go wrong? why did you lose your feelings for me? why do i like you so much if im not even allowed a chance with you?