Unsent Messages

I'm sorry for not committing. I have issues with trust, and commitment for absolutely no reason. I really did like you a lot. I'm not sure if I like you right now, but I wouldn't be surprised if I did because you're all I think about. it's sad. all of this my fault, I force myself away from the people I care about. maybe it's because I don't wanna hurt them. you moved on though. I don't know if I did. I should. the other day the song you learned on guitar for me came on and I considered texting you. I didn't because I didn't want to bother you, but it was my favorite song. you asked why I only have had one boyfriend before and I told you I guess I never had the opportunity. that was a lie. boys liked me. sometimes I liked them back sometimes they were creeps. I tried to make an exception for you, in fact, I did. I hate facetime but I liked face timing you. I could tell you were getting bored with me though. we hung out I had fun until you kissed me. I realized u were soon going to ask me out. I wanted you to be my boyfriend, and yet after that kiss, I distanced myself. trying to slow things down so I could truly get myself together for you. I told you what I was doing and you said you understood. but when I was finally ready to be able to be with you so I wouldn't end up hurting you or leaving you alone, you were gone. you were still there but hadn't even bothered to answer the text I sent 5 days ago. shit. it was all my fault, I'm sorry. I miss u.