Unsent Messages

idk man. do you still think of me? what happened hurt a lot more than i let you see, and it sucked for you to not even register or realise why it hurt and why i stopped texting. in the nicest way possible, i think that you should at least know that guys like you are the reason why girls don’t want guys with girl best friends. no matter how hard you try to imagine the situation flipped, i guarantee that you will find that you have no idea how much it hurt. i felt so betrayed and naïve and stupid. i never questioned your friendship with her, i feel like i was so calm and respectful about it, i encouraged your bond and was happy to see you happy. i hope you understand that now, because of what happened, i will never be able to date where there’s a girl best friend. you pushed and broke my trust. you got too comfortable. i stopped texting so that you could reflect and that we could fall out of habit from talking the way we did. and if you never did reflect or think about me at all, please understand that what you did should never, EVER, happen to anybody. i told you that i was happy when you were happy, but did you not think about how i felt, outside of what i was saying? after all those months and promises and ‘i’ll never drop you’s, you couldn’t even begin to imagine the betrayal i felt. when you still texted me after it happened, i really was shocked by the audacity. i hated the way that i had no time to step back or to remove myself from the situation and could only do so after a week, after the texts stopped coming. what happened was inconsiderate, isaac. i hope you never put another girl in the situation that you put me in. especially during my own quarantine, when you knew that i was at home in a bad mental place. i started to feel so empty and alone and betrayed that i could die. how lucky i am to be alive.