loving you was the most brutal, beautiful thing I've ever done. and it hurt even more because you lived 2,245 miles away from me. even if you didnt think what we had was real i committed to you and made a promise to you that i would be there for you are care for you. and now over a year after our breakup i desperately have this need in myself that you can only fulfill. i know you live in the city where dreams come true but every morning i look out to the east, to nyc, i look out from the vast desert i am stuck in; and at sunrise at 7am in the morning, i think about your laugh, your habit of sleeping with no sheets, that one piece of hair that always tends to fall in your face and i think about how you will always have someone. even if i hate you, i will always love you. i hope our paths cross again.