Unsent Messages

Talked to Torin today and i can’t get him off my mind. I'm so scared to say I love you, yet I'm so tempted to say it. When he sent me those videos of him a while back, his eyes appeared very prominent. Not protruding, rather a look in his eye, like he has something that’s holding him back. Fear, anguish, distress is what I see in his eyes. Maybe that's why he appears so cold. No emotions come from him. I feel so bad for him. I know and am fully aware of the fact that Torin has to cope with emotional trauma, and I hope I can help him find a reason to stay here on earth and in this life. Torin has an ethereal soul, which is what I think others fail to see. Cold, but the more you get to know him, the softer he becomes. He has these beautiful coloured eyes, like a mix of grey and blue. I just know they glimmer in the sunlight. I've come to the conclusion that he copes by not expressing emotion. He seems like the quiet kid in the back of the classroom. He’s so so smart, but he just doesn’t try, because in his mind hes been able to convince himself that what he does is so fucking pointless. He feels of no worth or value. That kid is kinda all i have left, i don't think he’s aware of that. Torin is why I wanna keep on living. I really really hope that that feeling is mutual. I wanna see a smile. I love you.