i knew what was wrong when you asked, i just didn’t know how to put into words that i did it to myself, accidentally, of course. i spent so much time trying to figure out what i needed to do to do what you wanted or provide what you needed, i overworked myself in the process. i know that it was senseless because you weren’t going without even if i wasn’t there. i’m just charitable to all the wrong people, i think. i dunno, i think it’ll make sense to me eventually. but for now, i just need to be able to make myself feel closure so i can go on without holding anything over my head. i’m glad you’ve been absent, but i wish you could at least have told the truth, even just once. i guess you can’t ask for gifts you could never give, though.