Unsent Messages

I got a notification that your birthday is tomorrow but i already knew that. i still think about you everyday. you fucked me over so bad. you lied over and over but you were so manipulative and good to it. i didn’t know what it was like to have someone gaslight me until you did it three years straight. i did everything for you and got absolutely nothing in return. you made excuses for everything you did and made me believe them. i still think the best of you and want the best for you. the last time i saw you you told me you loved me but i don’t want you to love me i want you to respect me. you did not care about anyone’s feeling except your own and only did things for your convenience. we were such good friends too. you know you fucked up this time. i forgave you so many times and made excuses for you and defended you to my friends and family. you called me crazy but it’s bc i knew all of your answers were lies and you were just using me. i don’t want to argue with you i just don’t ever want to talk to you. i asked if there was another girl and you said no but what about the 17th and what girl came over when you “fell asleep”? i still love you and care about you but i know you can’t say the same about me and i now love myself more than i love you. i will never let myself go through that again and be treated like that but now i never want to love anyone else. the feeling of love so rewarding and peaceful but it’s never worth going through the feeling of heartbreak and pain.