Unsent Messages

i send these messages in grey because it was one of your favorite colors btw. one out of the three. red, green, grey. not sure if they still are but that’s what you told me in february last year when we were playing 21 questions. i just don’t understand, you tell me i should remember my worth but it’s hard. i watched the person i loved so much go from looking at me like i was everything they ever wanted to looking at me and not feeling what they used to. it hurts so bad because i still love you and i think i’ve made that more than clear. i just wish i could get a chance to redo our relationship because maybe this time i’d try harder to be what you want. that’s all i want is to just be what you want again. i remember you telling me in may that i was all you wanted, and that youre very in love with me, and now in november you told me you don’t want me, that you want no contact with me and that i’m weird. i cried for hours after that. i know it was my fault but it hurt so bad hearing you tell me you don’t want me. cause i already knew but hearing it from you broke my heart all over again because you wanting me is all i ever wanted since i fell for you in that stupid cave at school. i just wish you would come back. i can’t stop thinking about you i can’t stop missing you and it’s driving me insane. you probably think i’m better off but i’m not.