i know you don't know how you feel, nor are you capable of a relationship right now. everything was a non-starter between us. but most importantly, i know you would've chosen her in a heartbeat because you did exactly that in september. and i can't even explain to you in full the amount of trauma i have because of her because then it would just seem vindictive and selfish, and there's a reason i didn't do so a year ago. i wish we got to experience friends to lovers but it wouldn't have worked anyways. i don't think we can even still be friends. in two months ill tell you goodbye, forever.