every time i think that i can recover from what you did to me i fall into another pit of reliving that night over and over and over again. i can't tell you how many years it's been because that entire month has been blocked from my mind apart from that night. i wish i had never been on that couch. i wish that i could get justice for what you did but it's been far too long for that now and i'm too far away. not that anyone ever believes me when i talk about it anyway. i can't even visit my mom without the fear of running into you and even the thought of your car makes me want to cry. you ruined me and i wish that i could forget you.