Unsent Messages

i sometimes sit and think about just how much of myself i lost along the way because of how much i loved you. sometimes i wish we'd never met. sometimes i want it to be like it usually is in the movies and for you to wake up and realise you love me. you've hurt me so so much it's crazy i'm still alive. but what's even crazier is that i don't hate you. and i can't, no matter what, hate you. you're far from perfect and i know it but i just love you for who you are. and kills me to know that you don't even want to be my friend. what did i do wrong? where did we go wrong? i'm still waiting for an answer. and the worst part is i know i'm not getting it soon...no, actually, no. the worst part is that i will never lovr anyone as much as i did and still do love you. and yet i still don't hate you. i just don't. hate. you. and that is so stupid.