Unsent Messages

i hate what happened between us. the worst thing though is that i still miss u so fucking bad. it’s been months but i still think abt holding u , ur laugh, and how safe u made me feel- for the first time i had someone i thought genuinely cared for me, but you just... let me go. i don’t think i will ever stop loving u and i hate myself for that. i wish u knew how badly u hurt me and how much i need u right now- with all that has happened this year i just wish i had at least one person who could be here for me bc i’ve never felt more alone. i still check up on u and i still listen to our song.
you were the first person i have ever loved and the first person to break my heart and for that i can never forgive u but i some how still find myself pining over our memories, late nights, christmas lights, driving through our shitty town blasting the playlist i made for u. angel- you won’t ever see this but, thank u. thank you for those memories, they are all i have now and they keep me hanging on. i hope i can find someone to make new memories with, and i hope u can find someone who will love u as much as i do.