Unsent Messages

Hey, how are you? Lol doesn't matter you prob won't even respond. Gosh, why do you have to play around so much. I told you I liked you as a joke and you admitted your feelings for me. I developed feelings for you truthfully because I felt freaking bad that I would have to reject you. Now, I kind of wish I did instead of crying over something you started. You're such a good guy but you're always giving me mixed signals that make me want to hit my head with a pan and get a concussion. Remember your first girlfriend? Yeah, I've seen the way that you still look at her and as much as it hurts, I know that you would be happier with her and that I'm probably just a possible cure to your boredom. As much as it hurts for me to be writing about her, 3 years after you broke up, I have a gut feeling that you will always love her and I'm okay with that as long as you are happy. It all started in 4th grade, you with your ugly blue lined glasses and your weird hair. Why do I like you? I don't even know lol. It hurts so much that you left me so quick just like I thought you would. It really fcking hurts. I hope that you come back and prove me wrong because I need a break from getting hurt. I wish you knew how bad you hurt me but I don't trust E anymore. I saw the screenshots of my chat with him that he sent and it makes me rethink my trust issues all over again. Thank you. Thank you for giving me happiness and sadness at the same time. I'm going to try and focus on myself more now that you hurt me. If you choose to text me, even just with a "okay", I would go crazy while you're sitting on your bed with your phone in your hands thinking about that other girl. All the well, the girl who somehow likes you.