Unsent messages to RAZEL

I love you, please be strong. I know that you can get through all of these. Please be happy:)

why are you waiting for me?

are you still waiting for me?..

I’m getting bad again. I’m going to be 16 soon. I feel alone all the time. I miss talking to you.. I miss being able to tell you things. I don’t tell anyone anything anymore. This sucks.

Are you really happier? I’ve haven’t seen you smile the way you did with me.. I can’t stop watching you with her. Is she really better? Does she make you feel safe?
I’ll never understand. I wish I understood. Does she know about your mole on the corner of your jaw? And the mole on your collar bone? Does she know about your beautiful hands? Does she think your soul is beautiful? Will she love you the way you deserve to be loved?
I’m sorry, bub. My sweet handsome boy. I just want you to be okay.

you’re a liar. you told me that i had this idea of you in my head that you couldn’t live up to. you put that idea there with your fake promises and plagiarized poems. you’re selfish. instead of taking the time to work on yourself and actually get better you go into other people’s lives just to fuck them up. you’re the most hateful & judgement person i’ve ever met. i’m sorry we didn’t work out. i’m sorry i used the hole against you.. but now that we’re broken up i realized that you were the hole.

You were my best friend and you introduced me to so many new things. I’m glad you’re happier with your new girl.